Adult-FanFiction.org : Buffy

Humanity	By : QueenB Category: AtS/BtVS Crossovers > Het - Male/Female > Angel(us)/Buffy > Angel(us)/Buffy Views: 4278 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer (BtVS), nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Tara watched the screen with unblinking eyes, absolutely riveted by the interplay between the characters. “This is a great movie.”
Xander stifled a yawn. “I would have preferred Rush Hour. Something with a little action, you know?”
“I like romance films. They put me in the mood for sex,” Anya responded.
Xander blinked rapidly and hastily replied, “Well, now that you mention it, there is something to be said for chick flicks, I suppose.”
Dawn giggled. “Yeah, you get to look at beautiful women smooch. And that Hugh Grant is such a hottie.”
“You think so?”
“Totally, Tara. That tall, beautiful body, that English accent. He’s got it all going on for him. No wonder Elizabeth Hurley is so crazy about him.”
“English accent, huh?”
Dawn blushed under Tara’s knowing stare. “Well, maybe not the accent so much. But it is kind of sexy, don’t you think?”
Tara pretended to consider it. “Maybe you’re right. It certainly helps that roommate of his get laid.”
“Ewwww, he’s wrinkled, scruffy, ugly and that T-shirt was disgusting!”
Tara laughed, “I know. I’d rather think about Julia Roberts though she’s a little skinny in this movie for my taste.”
“Tara, please! What would Willow think if she heard you?”
“Well, it would serve her right! Sneaking out behind my back with Charlize Theron!”
The two girls dissolved in laughter, while Xander and Anya glanced at each other and shrugged in puzzlement. Suddenly the phone rang in the hall. “I’ll get it!” Dawn cried as she bounded up. “Hi, what’s up?”
There was a moment of silence and then a familiar voice came on the line. “Oi, Little Bit. Is your sister there?”
“No, Spike, she’s not here. She’s out patrolling with Willow.”
“Willow! She’s gone out with the witch and not me?”
“Well, after that scene you made here the other night, can you blame her?”
“That wasn’t my fault. I was a little drunk….”
“Aha! I knew it! You told Buffy that you’d been rescuing virgins but you were really at a bar, weren’t you? Wait ‘til I tell her!”
“Look, she doesn’t need to know about that! I mean…oh bollocks, I don’t care if you tell her or not. In fact, I’ll tell her myself. Where did she and the witch go?”
“As if they’d tell me. They never tell me anything. Just wander around. I’m sure you’ll bump into them.” Dawn hung up the phone and flounced back to plop down in front of the tv set.
“Who was that?” Xander mumbled around a mouthful of popcorn.
“Nobody. Just Spike playing follow-the-bouncing-Buffy. Did I miss anything?”
“The roommate just caught Julia in the bathtub.”
“Oh, yuck!”
__________
Spike wandered around the cemeteries one more time. Just another sweep and then he was heading home. He’d taken off and put on his duster half a dozen times before going into the night. He tried to tell himself it didn’t matter if he met up with the Slayer. If she could stay away from him, he could stay away from her. If he met her on patrol, he’d just treat her with the same chilly contempt she’d shown him.
But somehow he wound up in front of her house, just like always. How wretched was this? The Big Bad once again reduced to hanging out longingly at the door of a girl who didn’t want him. It seemed as if, in spite of the sex, Buffy would never love him. She’d hidden behind her friends, laughed in his face and treated the entire episode as if it had never happened. He, on the other hand, couldn’t stay away and he couldn’t get any closer.
Suddenly, he spotted two figures stumbling towards the front door--Buffy and Willow. He frowned. Something was wrong. Buffy wasn’t moving with her usual confident stride. In fact, she almost appeared to be in pain. Stepping out of the shadows, he did his best to appear nonchalant as he walked behind the two girls. “Evening, ladies. Lovely night for a stroll. Mind if I join you?”
“Get lost, Spike. We’re not in the mood for another round of scandal-mongering,” Willow hissed angrily.
Spike ignored her as if she hadn’t spoken. “Come on, Buffy. The night’s young. Let’s see if we can find some vampires to vanquish and demons to demolish. No need to bring your little friend if she’s not feeling up to it.”
Buffy said nothing. She just leaned heavily against Willow as the red-haired girl struggled to hold her and press the doorbell at the same time.
Spike peered closely at her even though Buffy shrank from his scrutiny. “What’s wrong with you, pet? Did you get into a scrape tangling with the demonic beasties all on your own? That’s why you should let old Spike pitch in. I’m sure I could have been a lot better help than Red here.”
The door swung open before either girl could reply. Tara stared, aghast, as Willow heaved Buffy over the doorstep.
Spike sniffed tentatively. Finding only a faint whiff of garlic, he tried to follow only to be repelled by the barrier erected days before. He pounded against it in impotent fury and yelled, “Okay, that’s it! You bints aren’t shutting me out this time. Dawn! Dawn! Let me in! Your sister needs help!”
Xander, Anya and Dawn came running. Dawn cried out in shock at the sight of her sister, pale and shaking. “Oh my god! Buffy!”
Willow hastened to reassure her. “It’s okay, Dawn. Buffy just got into a bit of trouble on patrol. It’s nothing that a little rest can’t fix.”
Before Dawn could reply, the phone rang. Tara said, “I’ll get it. Dawn, you should stay with Buffy.” She picked up the phone and said distractedly, “Summers’s residence. Who is it?” She stiffened as she listened to the voice on the other end of the phone. “Wait a moment, I’ll get Willow.”
She called out to Willow who had carefully seated Buffy on the couch. “Willow, you should get the phone. It’s very important.”
“Can’t it wait? Buffy needs help.”
“It’s that call we were expecting.”
Willow’s head shot up at that almost whispered statement. She glanced down, gnawing her lip at the silent Slayer. “Just wait here a moment until I get back. Okay?” Buffy gazed blankly at her then nodded slowly.
Willow picked up the phone. “Hello? Yes, Dawn’s here. Spike’s here, too. Oh yeah, she’s here.” She paused, listening intently to the voice on the other end. “Right. See you soon.”
She hung up and walked back to the living room. Only then did she become aware that Spike had been yelling incessantly in the background since she’d arrived with Buffy.
“Oi, are you bints letting me in or not? Look, I’ve been coming here all summer. You’ve got no right keeping me out like this. I promised Buffy I’d take care of Dawn.”
Willow scowled at him. “And you did that beautifully, Spike. But lately all you seem to think or care about is Buffy. We’ve been taking care of Dawn while you’ve been gallivanting around town, getting into bar fights.”
“Stalking after my sister,” Dawn flatly interjected.
Willow chimed in, “Getting drunk.”
“Causing scenes.”
“And behaving like a total wanker,” Dawn ended, wrinkling her nose in Spike’s direction.
Buffy called out to the vampire. “Oh, I can tell you’ve been a real positive influence on her, Spike!”
Tara chided them. “Guys, can we save the blamefest for later? Buffy needs help.” Everybody’s attention focused back on the Slayer. She had leaned back until she almost reclined on the couch. Warren’s jacket had slipped off revealing the ice that still lay over her arm like a plaster cast.
“Willow, what happened? Did she run into that ice demon that robbed the museum?”
“Something like that, Anya. Look, guys, there’s something I have to tell you….”
“Hello, Spike.”
Everybody froze at the sound of that voice. Buffy walked calmly into the house and stared at the girl lying on the sofa.
Willow sighed in relief. “Hi, Buffy. Welcome back.”
__________
The others gazed at the Buffy coming through the front door as if it were the most natural thing in the world. Everyone except Dawn and Spike. The younger Summers girl glared at him. “Oh, I see what’s been going on. You had Warren build you another Buffybot. That’s why you’ve been hanging around her, isn’t it?”
Before Spike could answer, the standing Buffy gazed calmly at him and said, “Come in, Spike.”
Spike had been leaning against the invisible barrier staring at her in stunned amazement. When the barrier was suddenly removed, he was caught by surprise and fell into the house. The tension broke and everybody laughed out loud as he struggled up, entangled in his long duster.
“That’s what I like about Chips Ahoy. He’s such a graceful man.”
He flipped Xander a two-fingered salute and slammed the door shut. He looked between the two Buffys. “Neither of them is a ‘bot. I can tell that much. They’ve both got heartbeats and pulses.” He peered at the one on the couch. “She seems a bit off, though.”
“That’s because she’s not the real Buffy.” Tara’s calm statement rendered Spike speechless as he stared at her.
Willow drew a piece of paper out of her pocket and whispered, “Ignis.” The paper caught fire and in moments burnt down to ashes.
The Buffy on the couch remained motionless for just a second. Then her skin began to darken, turning gray, then black. Her hair became ashen, her eyes dulled. Her figure seemed to sag imperceptibly and then, with only the faintest whisper of sound, she collapsed into a shapeless heap of dirt. The only things that remained were her clothes, a sleeve of ice, Warren’s jacket and the diamond that lay winking in the clods.
Willow cringed at the dirty mess. “Oops, sorry, Buffy. I should have waited until we got it outside. Don’t worry, I know a magic spell that’ll get the dirt right out.”
Dawn stared in total horror at the remains of the thing that had been Buffy. Xander grabbed the diamond out of the mess and said, “Cool, Willow! You didn’t tell me this thing came with prizes inside! Just like a box of Cracker Jacks. I take it this is the diamond that everybody’s been searching for?”
Willow plucked the jewel out of Xander’s hands. “That it is. We picked it up tonight from Warren’s place. It turned out he and his two friends had nabbed the diamond in some stupid scheme they had going. When we tried to get it back, one of them zapped the fake-Buffy with a freeze gun. You would have loved it, Xander. It was totally cool, like something out of Batman.”
“It was Warren?” Spike blurted out. His blue eyes turned icy. “But he wasn’t the one who made this…thing, was he?”
“Nope. This was my own idea after I brought Buffy back.”
“You all knew about this, didn’t you. And you didn’t tell me.” At the harsh accusation from Dawn, Willow turned apologetic eyes towards her.
“Dawn, you have to understand. After Buffy came back, she was so distant, depressed and strange. We all thought that maybe a little time away from Sunnydale was what she needed. So when Angel called…”
“That ponce? What the hell does that nancyboy have to do with this? And when did he call, anyway?” Spike snarled.
“It was over eight weeks ago. Buffy decided to go up to Los Angeles to see him. He’d been to Hell….”
“….and I’d been to Heaven. It seemed as if we finally had something in common.” Buffy smiled ironically.
“She’s been with him ever since then. Healing and catching up with him,” Tara finished.
Spike shook his head. “And this walking compost heap you created? What was it?”
“A golem. I created it using dirt from Buffy’s grave, some of her hair, fingernail clippings and her blood. She was so well made with the magicks, she actually believed she was Buffy. It’s another reason the real Buffy had to leave. Unlike the Buffybot, the fake would never have accepted another version of herself.”
“WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME?!?” Dawn screamed.
Buffy reached out for her sister, who backed away, clenching her fists. “Dawn, it was my idea not to tell you. I didn’t want you to think that I was going away and leaving you for good, not when I’d just come back to you.”
He felt as if the world were whirling around him. Ever since she’d invited him into the house, she’d barely glanced at him. Now he felt as if he couldn’t stand it any longer. “You mean, you’ve been in L.A. for two whole months and you didn’t tell…her?”
Me. She didn’t tell ME. I was kept out of it, too. They’d all known and hadn’t told me.
Then something clicked. Two months. That meant that he’d…
“You’re telling me I had sex with…THAT?” Spike looked away in revulsion and loathing at the dirtpile on the couch only to meet the disbelieving stares of the others.
“Whoa, Spike, you mean when you came here and made that scene, you were telling the truth? You had sex with the fake-Buffy?” Willow’s smile did nothing to hide the faint tinge of malice behind it.
“We thought you were just kidding when you said that. You know, stirring up mischief the way you usually do when you’re bored,” Tara added with a sympathetic look.
Xander snorted and then laughed out loud. “Man, Spike, you really know how to pick ‘em. Let’s see, so far your known tally of girlfriends includes Drusilla the Loon, Harmony who gives dumb blondes a bad name, that sex toy Buffybot and now a claymation figure. Why don’t you just buy blow-up dolls like other pathetic single men do?”
“Wait a minute!” Dawn cried. “I remember her telling me Spike was hitting her. She didn’t mention any sex.”
Buffy squinted at Spike. “You hit me? I mean, her?”
Willow wrinkled her brows. “She must have done what the real Buffy would have done. She was ashamed of having sex with Spike so she hid the truth from us.”
Spike stared at Buffy--the real Buffy. “I don’t believe it.”
“That she would be ashamed of sleeping with you? Believe it, tiger,” Xander crowed. “You’re not the kind of boy a girl brings home to meet the parents.”
“No, I don’t believe that I slept with that dirt clod over there.” He strutted over to Buffy, deliberately invading her space. “I don’t think you were in L.A. for two months. You ran home, told your friends and cooked up this elaborate charade to fool me.”
Buffy gave him a disinterested look. “Now why would we go to all that effort for you, Spike?”
“Because you couldn’t handle the truth. You wanted me, Slayer, and you gave in to it. You didn’t want to believe that you could possibly be attracted to me for even a second so you’re all trying to make me think it didn’t happen. But there’s no way I’d be fooled into mistaking lumps of dirt for you.”
“That doesn’t look like it from where we’re standing, Dye Boy. If there’s anything we’ve learned, it’s that you’re real comfortable accepting stand-ins for the genuine article.”
“This from a man who’s about to marry a demon who spent eleven centuries torturing men. Talk about poor romantic choices,” Spike sneered.
“Hey, at least my girlfriend’s sane! And flesh and blood!” Xander retorted.
“Hold it. Let’s back up a minute.” Buffy rounded on Spike. “What was that Dawn said about your hitting the fake-me?”
“That’s right. And it wasn’t a fake, it was the real you, so you can cut the crap, luv.” He plopped down on the couch, deliberately pushing off some of the dirt onto the floor. “I found out I could hit Buffy, we started pounding on each other…and then we started pounding on each other, if you get my meaning,” he gave a shark-toothed grin and continued. “Willow brought Buffy back with something missing and it made her less than human. She’s not batting for homo sapiens anymore.”
Willow sighed, “Spike, we’ve told you. Of course, you were able to hit Buffy because it wasn’t Buffy. It was a golem. She may have thought she was Buffy--that’s why you were fooled. But the fact is, she was a magical creation. That’s how you could hit her without getting zapped.”
Buffy interrupted. It was obvious the conversation was going nowhere fast and she was determined to resolve it. “Look, there’s one way to settle this.” She turned to Spike. “Hit me.”
The blonde vampire was taken aback. She wanted him to hit her? In front of the others?
“Come on. Take one good swing at me. That’ll prove whether it was me you were with. Or that.” She gestured to the clods slowly falling off the couch.
Spike got up and walked over to her. “Right then.” He cocked back his fist and hesitated. The others were staring, waiting for him to make his move. Dawn was glowering at him with a tight expression around her mouth.
Buffy alone appeared to be calm. She stood in front of him without a trace of fear or apprehension. There was none of the old antagonism, no anger, no irritation. She radiated peace and contentment.
And she reeked of Angel.
The smell of him was all over her. Her hair, her clothes, her very skin was imbued with his scent. She’d been in L.A., for two months or two weeks, he couldn’t tell. But she’d been with him. She’d gone racing off to see him at the drop of a phone call and he’d been rolling around obliviously in the arms of another substitute.
Xander was right. He was pathetic.
No! He refused to think that. It was all a trick and he’d prove it with one blow. His fist flashed out and caught her on the jaw, causing her to reel back and then…..
“AAAAAAAAAAAAHHH SHIT! BLOODY HELL!” There it was, the agony sizzling through his skull, setting his brain on fire. It caught him off guard and sent him crashing to the floor. Gripping his head, he looked up through fiercely blinked-back tears at the faces of the Scoobies. Various expressions ranging from glee to barely concealed pity showed up on their countenances.
“Well, that’s that. I’d say we’ve had enough excitement for one night.” Buffy moved towards the stairs without a backward glance and started making her way upstairs.
“Xander, can we go home now? All this talk about sex with dolls and toys has given me some ideas.” Xander pulled his fiancée quickly out of the house, muttering under his breath about personal issues and contributing to the delinquency of minors.
Dawn, Willow and Tara glanced down at Spike who was slowly climbing to his feet. Willow yawned, “If that was all, Spike, I guess you can go now. We’re all really tired and you probably want to go out looking for--what was it you said?--demons to demolish, vampires to vanquish? I’d go with you, but I’d probably just get in your way.”
Dawn glared at him before turning away. “Asshole. You hit Buffy. You really know your way to a girl’s heart, don’t you?”
Spike yelled up at the retreating girls. “This isn’t over, Slayer! I know you and the witches did something! This is all some kind of trick and I’m getting to the bottom of it!”
“Whatever, Spike. Close the door on your way out, all right?” Buffy called down.
Spike stood for a moment, swaying with indecision. He kicked off the remaining dirt and ground it into the rug. He felt a brief surge of malicious satisfaction and then he deflated with defeat. He’d been made a royal fool of, but he couldn’t figure out how it had been done. How could those bunch of misfits have pulled a fast one on him, of all people? He stomped out of the house, slamming the door viciously.
__________
The girls watched him leave from an upper-story window. When he was safely out of sight, they started whooping with delight. Dawn bounced up and down, crowing, “And the Oscar for Best Actress goes to Dawn Summers, formerly known as the Key, most recently known as Little Bit!”
Buffy, Tara and Willow smiled indulgently at her. “Great performance, Dawnie. A definite A for effort. When you started screaming, though, I thought you were overdoing it a little. But otherwise, it was perfect.”
Dawn rolled her eyes. “Everyone’s a critic.”
Buffy yawned a little and flopped onto her bed. “Guys, I know you have a lot of questions about L.A. but can it wait until tomorrow? I’m really beat.”
“Buffy, wait. Was it true--what Spike said? I mean, about having sex with you?
Buffy wrinkled her nose in disgust. “Ewww, no, Dawn! I am not having sex with Spike. It’s just like Willow said. I’ve been in L.A. with Angel for two whole months. When I supposedly came back after being resurrected, that’s when the switch was made. I’m sorry we didn’t tell you, but we had to be certain to fool Spike. He was spending more time with you than anyone else. We weren’t sure you could put up as convincing an act as everybody else.”
“But if it were true, you’d tell me, right?”
“Oh sure, Dawn. That’s just the sort of thing I’d discuss with my little sister. Come on, I didn’t tell you about having sex with Riley, did I?”
“As if I didn’t know about that. Besides, that’s different. Riley’s human. Maybe you’d be ashamed about telling me about sex with Spike, like Willow said.”
“If I refused to tell you about sex with Spike, it’d be because it was shameful and there’s be no love involved, not because he’s a vampire. I wasn’t ashamed about sex with Angel. Even though that turned out rather badly.”
Buffy paused, her eyes distant as if reliving bad memories. Then she shook it off. “Anyway, I’m tired from my trip and I really need some sleep.”
“But Buffy…what about L.A.? How were things between you and Angel?”
“GOODNIGHT, Dawn.”
“God, nobody tells me anything around here!” Dawn tossed her hair and stalked sullenly from the room.
Closing the door on her sister’s protests, Buffy threw herself down on the bed again. “Home, sweet home,” she murmured. Opening one eye, she realized Willow and Tara were still standing expectantly by the bed. “What?”:
[BUFFY, WESLEY DID IT, DIDN’T HE? HE FOUND OUT WHAT WAS WRONG WITH YOU AND FIXED IT?] the red-head conveyed, mindful of listening ears.
[NO, HE DIDN’T, WILLS.]
[B-BUT, WE ALL SAW, SPIKE GOT MAJORLY HURT WHEN HE TRIED TO HIT YOU.] Tara frowned in confusion.
[YEAH, BUT THAT WASN’T BECAUSE I GOT ‘FIXED’ AS WILLOW PUTS IT. WESLEY RAN TEST AFTER TEST. HE SAYS THAT I’M DIFFERENT ALRIGHT, BUT HE COULDN’T FIGURE OUT HOW. HE RAN SO MANY BLOOD TESTS I FEEL LIKE A HUMAN PINCUSHION. THEY SHOWED UP AS NORMAL. HE RAN MAGICAL TESTS. YOU WOULDN’T BELIEVE THE DISGUSTING STUFF I HAD TO DRINK AND EAT. ZOO ANIMALS WOULDN’T TOUCH THIS JUNK. IT WAS NO GO. ALL HE COULD TELL WAS THAT I’M NOT QUITE LIKE OTHER PEOPLE. BUT WHETHER THAT HAS TO DO WITH THE RESURRECTION OR BECAUSE I’M A SLAYER IS A MYSTERY. IN THE END, HE WAS STUMPED.]
[SO WHAT HAPPENED TO SPIKE?] Tara queried.
[I TOLD WESLEY ABOUT THE BUFFY-BASHING PROBLEM AND HE CAME UP WITH A NIFTY SOLUTION. HE TOOK THAT SKULL RING SPIKE GAVE ME AND USED IT TO BIND SPIKE WITH MAGIC. AS LONG AS THAT CHIP IS IN HIS HEAD, HE’LL SUFFER EXCRUCIATING PAIN WHENEVER HE TRIES TO HURT ME AND WON’T BE ABLE TO TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THAT AND ANY OTHER ATTEMPTS TO HURT HUMANS.]
Willow grinned at Buffy. [BOY, THAT RING IS GETTING A LOT OF USES, ISN’T IT?]
Buffy couldn’t help it. She felt a slow smile tugging at her own face. [IT SURE IS. AND SPIKE IS NONE THE WISER. HE THINKS HE HAD SEX WITH A DIRTPILE. IT’S GOING TO BE A LOT OF FUN RUBBING HIS FACE IN THAT. HE’LL NEVER LIVE IT DOWN.]
The girls fell onto the bed, hugging Buffy between them. Then Buffy decided to talk again. “So….tell me about what’s been happening since I’ve been gone? Anything interesting I should know about?
Willow looked questioningly at her. “I thought you were tired.”
Buffy shrugged, “I just wanted to get rid of you-know-who. Come on, spill.”
“Well, I cooked up a spell that had Spike losing at cards. He also can’t get people to play him at pool. Every time he asks them, they get this feeling of major distrust. So, no players. Oh, and Anya called in a favor with a local wish demon she used to know back in her vengeance days. She came up with Bleached Blonde night at the Bronze.”
Buffy’s eyebrows shot almost up to her hairline. “Bleached Blonde night? I bet Spike hated that. Tell me more.”

TBC
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