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Heart's Desire	By : PencilNeck Category: -Buffy the Vampire Slayer > FemmeSlash - Female/Female > Buffy/Faith Views: 9582 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 2
Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer (BtVS), nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 4
- 5
- 6
Chapter 5: In The Flat Field

�So he�s not one of yours?�
Willow looks disappointed.

�Unfortunately for you, he�s not. I only offer the honour of demon-hood to the
fairer of your species, Ms. Rosenberg.�

Well, do you know anything about a hot-to-trot Fabio
demon?� Xander asks, obviously
frustrated.

�Oh, god Xander! Fabio was so last
decade. And since when is that great
hair?� Dawn shot off. Tensions were running high.

�D�Hoffryn, do you know anything about this? Cos if you do, you should tell us. Or I could decide that vengeance demons
become a high priority here.� Xander
could sometimes look very threatening.
Who knew?

�I have heard some things.
A race of demons. They provide similar services to their
clients. But they don�t specialize in
vengeance. So we don�t tend to
socialize.�

�Got a name? An email? Maybe a summoning chanty thing?� Xander is used to being in charge.

�Let me see what I can do for you��

Willow sends him
back through his portal with a very friendly, �Thanks! See you!�

There�s a light beeping sound coming from Xander�s
wristwatch. He puts it close to his
face. Puts his
earpiece in.

�Harris. Aha.
No word? OK, send out a full unit. We need those two back here. Buffy�s very... ill.� Xander looks up at Giles, getting approval
for his white lie.

�I do think it�s best not to
disclose the full extent of Buffy�s� condition, for now.� Giles looks everyone in the eye. �Let�s try to limit...�

The gang nod.

�So now, all we can do is wait?� Dawn looked very scared.

�No, we can�t wait. I�ll
find them, then meet the team.� Willow
starts to clear a space on the floor.

****************************

Not pain? Not yet�

Faith feels warmth on her lips. Hands in her hair. Heat on her skin. Strong fingers weave their way through her
matted hair, down the side of her face. Pulling at the back of her neck. Buffy�s hands? Buffy�s lips? Oh God!
Buffy�s tongue! Faith can�t
remember where she is. Can�t quite
remember what happened to make her hurt.
But she knows she can�t hold herself up.
She�s falling. Sliding
down the brick wall. Except for Buffy�s hands.
They hold her up. Push into her
hips. Pin her to the wall. She wraps her arms around Buffy�s neck. Rests her head against
Buffy�s shoulder with a sigh. Buffy will save me. Isn�t that what Buffy always does?

Buffy�s lips and tongue seek out the places where the skin�s
been torn. Where there�s copper and a
shallow intake of breath. Buffy�s hand
feels under the shirt, pressing over the ribs that were broken. Faith can�t do anything. Anything but feel. Try to breathe. Close her eyes.

Buffy�s hand moves from the broken ribs, up the broken
girl. Under the shirt. Same old Faithy. No bra.
Nipples hard.
Buffy�s hand. Feather
light and intense. Faith can only
feel.

Buffy�s lips. Moving away from Faith�s
mouth, trailing the line of bruises that seems a never ending circuitry of blue
and red on Faith�s skin.

Buffy�s tongue. Licking the blood. Tonguing the cuts on her chin and licking
down to her shoulder to catch the red lines that mark her there.

Faith�s light tank is ripped away. More circuitry. More patterns for Buffy to trace. Buffy licks a line down to the breast, to the
nipple.

Faith can only whisper �Buffy� no� I can�t��
Breathe.

Buffy�s hand traces across her belly. The belly that she cut. That she gutted. She wants to see the scar. Pulls away from the fascinating patterns to
see the apex of the pain she�s caused.
The Rosetta Stone. Unlock it, and you can understand. Traces the scar with her
fingers. Licks
it. Nips it
with her teeth. Kisses the raised white boundary. The map to Faith, and the
wall that keeps her out. This white line, visible from space?

The hand that snakes under, tracing the path by the white
road. Faith doesn�t wear anything under
her leather. Buffy�s hand. Pushing down and into her. Faith can only feel.

Buffy�s hands are delicate.
But not gentle. Never gentle with
Faith. She doesn�t understand gentle.

Buffy returns to her exploration of the blueprint forming on
Faith�s skin. One hand
on the left breast, holding the girl up.
Kneading.
Pinching.

The tongue and the mouth. They go together to explore the right side
where the patterns are subtly changing in front of Buffy�s eyes. She can see the small cuts healing. Feel the muscles slowly returning to
strength. I can do that too.

Buffy�s fingers are small.
Buffy�s hands are nice, and small.
How can she make it hurt so much?

�Buffy? Please!�

Buffy�s hands keep pushing.
Pinching.
Buffy�s mouth and tongue are resting on red wine lips made softer and
fuller by pain. Building
new roads on the map with her nails and her teeth.

And Faith can�t breathe.
Can�t talk.
Can�t hear the twisted cooing from Buffy�s lips. Can�t do anything but feel the pleasure. The heat and the pain. And the trembling. And she can�t breathe.

With a low moan, Buffy feels Faith�s body collapse in a
shiver. Buffy pulls away. Buffy�s mouth. Buffy�s tongue. Buffy�s hands. Torn away one by one.

And Faith can only fall.

****************************

�Oh now, look at the mess you�ve made.� Buffy singsongs as she backs up to take a
look at the woman she�

Faith is bleeding, from her face and body in so many tiny
places. Her breathing is shallow,
ragged. Her nose is broken.

She�s not conscious.

Her jacket covers only her arms. But her tank top is lying in tatters beside
her. All the bruises show. Her leather pants, unbuckled, unzipped, expose
her scar. Our scar. We made that together.

There�s something strange about the way her leg lies, but
Buffy thinks she looks beautiful. It
makes her mad.

She turns, and saunters away. Faith doesn�t need her anymore.

Want. Take. Have. It
really has always been that simple.

It�s not about love.
Not about lust.

---

It�s about power.

****************************

She thought she�d been dreaming. A nightmare. Par for the course.

But then she wakes up.

Faith would never cry.

Faith would struggle to find the strength to fit the buttons
of her jacket into the little holes they were definitely not made to actually
go through.

Faith would tell herself to stand up. Stand up.
Stand up. Until she might be able
to really do it. Might be able to put herself back together.

Faith would make herself aware of her surroundings. Even in the dark. She�d grope over old moldy furniture and
greasy pots and pans. Or trip and fall
not entirely ungracefully onto old mattresses stained with sex and sweat and
blood.

Faith might go into an old bathroom and catch a glimpse of
herself in a cracked mirror. She might
recoil. She might stand there, shocked
at the amount of damage two hands can do to a face. She might be shaking, sweating, and then yank
her nose back into place with a scream. She might even vomit. But she�d never say.

She might sit on those mattresses and remember things she
buried. Might stare into space for what
seems like days and days. She might yell
and scream in her hoarse, cigarette flavoured voice until her throat was as raw
and bleeding as the rest of her. Faith
would find a way out. A way through, if
it has to be that way.

Faith would claw.
Scratch. Burn a way out of here
with her cigarette lighter.

But Faith would never cry.

****************************

Buffy sneaks away from her little love nest. Quietly. ��Don�t wanna wake Sleeping Beauty.� A low throaty chuckle.

Ducking through a main floor window, Buffy escapes her
secret hideaway. Feeling
good now. Ready
for some sleep.

Her Slayer senses come a�tinglin�. What
the hell. I can do a few more tonight. She turns the corner.

And she looks up into the faces of her army. Girls she trained. Girls she knows. Some even that she�s kinda friends with. And they�re lookin� at her funny.

�You�re not here for l�il ole me? Are you?�
Buffy asks. But she knows. And she gets into her fighting stance. Once again.

�You�re really not expecting to win this, are you
Buffy?�

That voice is familiar.

Willow.

�Hey Red! Been a while!� Buffy leans back on her hips, and looks up to
see her best friend�s face.

All she sees are sparks.

****************************

Just lying here in this wreckage makes Faith lonesome for
her crappy motels. At least there she
could sleep, shower. Order in
Chinese. Faith laughs to herself, and
then curses when the pain hits.

She has to lie still for a minute. Concentrate on breathing. Just breathing. Like the doc always says.

Am I falling asleep,
or passing out, or dying? I can�t
tell. I can always tell.

And Faith drifts further away�

Red?

****************************

�Damnit. She was there. I felt her, for a second.� Willow
kept searching for Faith�s mind, while the girls kept a quiet watch over the
unconscious and magically bound Buffy.

A crackle over the earpieces. Kennedy�s voice.

�OK, I want ten of you, split into teams of two, circular
search from the exact spot that Willow
is standing in right now. The rest of
you escort Buffy back to base. Don�t
hurt her, but keep her down until she�s back home. OK ladies, execute! Go! Go! GO!�

A flurry of movement surrounds Willow
as the slayers take up positions and begin the sweep. It soon dies down. These girls are quick. Efficient.

Willow reaches
out with her energy and searches again for Faith. It�s easier when they�re dreaming. Harder when they�re
injured. It�s mostly impossible
when they�re�

�Hey Red!� Faith grabs the redhead into a big hug.

�Hey yourself, Faith!� Willow�s
where now? �So, I�m where now?�

Willow looks
around. She�s in Sunnydale.

This is Buffy�s house.

�I thought we blew this up?�
Willow says, mostly to
herself.

�Hey, Mrs. S. Is it
cool with you if Will stays for dinner?�

Willow turns and
sees Joyce walk into the hallway from the dining room. She catches her breath in her throat.

�Of course Faith, we love Willow. Anyone who can explain calculus to my
daughter gets to eat here whenever she feels like it!� Joyce, bright and cheery,
and alive.

Willow shakes
her head. This is familiar, sorta.

�OK! Why are we here Faith?�

�Whaddya mean, Red? Home cooking, B and Dawnie, Mrs. S. It�s a little piece of perfect.�

�Dawnie! Can you come set the table, please?� Joyce�s voice rings soft but strong through
the house.

�I don�t see why I hafta set the stupid table. It�s Buffy�s night and so what she�s got
slayer duties� Faith!� A thirteen year old Dawn tumbles down the
stairs. She practically wraps herself
around the dark haired slayer. �Can you
tell Mom that I�m SO NOT too young to wear leather pants?�

�Come on Squirt, I�ll help you set the table.� And Faith is beaming, walking Dawn into the
living room. One arm
around the kid�s shoulders. Protective. Like a
big sister.

Willow turns
away. She�s somewhere else� Joyce�s bedroom. Her bedroom, once upon a
time. Joyce is on the bed, scared
and worried. She has a black eye. Faith has a knife.

�She was over us a long time ago, Joyce. Too busy climbing onto her new boy toy to
give a single thought to the people that matter. I mean, you�re her mother and she just leaves
you here to die!�

And Buffy crashes through the window, tackling Faith. They fight like wild dogs.

Willow turns to
escape the violence, and realizes, �I�ve done this before!� With Buffy. When she lost Dawn. When she lost hope.

Some quick flashes. School. Working out. Buffy smiles. And Willow
is at the Bronze. There�s a crowd
tonight, but Willow remembers and
her eyes look straight to the dance floor.
And there they are. Faith and Buffy. Dancing together.

�Gosh. Buffy never
said it was�� Willow walks up
close, and sees the same happiness, the same loose smile on Faith�s lips. Sees the dance for what it is. Even if they themselves
don�t. She watches them� until Buffy goes to
Angel.

Then she watches Faith.
Her smile.

It�s different.

�****************************

Xander is a busy man
today. Very busy. Got Will and the slayerettes workin� her mojo
on Faith. D�Hoffryn
is sending new intel on Rabid Buffy. She�s coming out of her magic cuffs and straight into a nice,
padded, super reinforced cell.. And there�s three
other teams on assignment.

And I swear to Cleveland that if I lose any one of my girls today, I
am going to stab out the eye of every damned demon I can find until one of them
tells me SOMETHING!

Xander�s also not good with rage. Or dealing. But good with�.

�Bring up six on the screen and patch in for audio. Direct to me.� Xander sounds so calm.

�Yeah boss?� Andrew�s face larger than life.

�Anything turn up? Anything?�

�Nothing yet, but I have a team out now. I�m sure they�ll bring something back.� Andrew looks nervous.

�OK. Contact me immediately. And Andrew� Don�t
lose anyone today. That�s an order.�

�Sure thing, Xander.�

�Command Centre out.�

No jokes. No references to things spacey or
swordy. Just doing my
job.

****************************

There are too many places here in Faith. Too many moments she�s clinging to. And it�s getting very jumpy in Willow�s
mind. How long has she been in?

Buffy�s house. Slaying with Buffy. Hanging with the Scoobs.
Hanging at Sunnydale High. Faith with Buffy. Buffy and Faith.

Training with Buffy.

�� I mean, you�re still going to that dance, right?�

�Maybe.�

�You got the tix already.
Why don�t we go together?�

Willow looks at
Faith. Back up? Faith asked�?

Willow looks at
Buffy.

�I don�t know about that.�

And it�s not what Buffy says, but the smile that matters
here.

------

And it always jumps from here to the Bronze.

She has to find the right moment. She�s done it before. She can do it again. Willow
walks away from the dance floor, letting Buffy and Faith grind away.

The sounds of the Bronze fade away. But the music doesn�t. The song stays, blaring and fuzzy. Like out of a CD Player.

She�s in Faith�s apartment.
Faith�s reading a book? Oh, comic.

Buffy is there, too.
She turns off the stereo.

�You gonna feed me to Angel?
You know you�re not going to take me alive.�

�Not a problem.�
Faith and Willow both wince
at the harsh tone of Buffy�s voice.

�Well look at you.
All dressed up in big sister�s clothes.�

�You told me I was just like you. That I was holding it in.� She�s
so angry�

�Ready to cut loose?�

�Try me.�

�Okay then. Give us a kiss.�

Buffy punches Faith in the jaw.

Willow knows she
has to stay. See it through. Cos it happens here. She doesn�t want to see this, but Willow
waits. We don�t have time to circle back again.

They�re fighting on the terrace now. Buffy has the knife.

Faith�s doing all the talking. Like it�s normal to be
fighting to the death. With
someone you�

�Man, I�m going to miss this.�

Willow gasps. Oh god, Buffy. You stabbed her. I mean, I knew you stabbed her. But I didn�t know you like. Stabbed. Her.

�You did it.� And
Faith is smiling, like she�s proud. �You killed me.�

Willow sits on
the floor of the moving truck, stroking Faith�s hair. She can get her home now.
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Heart's Desire