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Daylight	By : addielogan Category: AtS/BtVS Crossovers > Het - Male/Female > Buffy/Spike(William) > Buffy/Spike(William) Views: 9360 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer (BtVS) or Angel, the Series (AtS); nor any of the characters from them. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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They ended up at the Santa Monica
Pier. Spike found a place to stand, looking over the ocean, watching the
sunlight as it danced over the water. Buffy watched him, smiling at the awe and
delight that was apparent on his face at something so simple. She reached up,
touching his arm. "It's beautiful, isn't it?"
"Yeah. I haven't seen the ocean like this in so
long. It's nice at night, but it's not the same. When I was little�when my
father was still alive, and my mum wasn't so sick�we'd go to the seaside during
the summer. The first day there, I'd always stay out the whole time, despite my
mother's complaints and the fact that I'd end up resembling a lobster. Never
much wanted to go in the water, but I loved watching everything, taking it all
in. Just being out there in the sunshine."
Buffy felt her
heart tug at the thought of Spike as a child, visiting the beach with his
family. "Have you
missed it? I mean, all these years have you been wishing you could see the sun
again?"
"Sometimes. Didn't much with Dru.
Thought I'd found something better." The bitterness in his tone when he
spoke of Drusilla surprised Spike as he felt a sudden swell of anger at his
sire for what she'd taken from him. As a vampire, he'd seen what Drusilla as
having given him a gift, but now that he was human again, things looked a
little differently. Still, if Dru had never turned him, then he wouldn't have
met Buffy. Even with all the bad things that had happened in his relationship
with the Slayer, he wouldn't trade a moment of it.
"Was it better?"
Buffy's voice pulled Spike back to
the moment. "Was what better?"
"When you
were a vampire�with Drusilla.
Was it better than this?"
Spike looked at Buffy, cupping her
cheek in his hand. "Nothing's better than this, luv."
Buffy's eyes widened, and Spike
could hear her heartbeat speed up. He knew if he kissed her then that she'd
kiss back, but he didn't know what would happen after that. He wanted nothing
more than to live this new life he'd been given with the woman he loved, but
for the first time in such a long time, he was afraid to take a chance. What if
she tossed him aside like she had before? He didn't think he could handle that again,
not now. If he was going to have Buffy, he wanted all of her. He pulled back
and said with a shrug, "Guess I'm done with the whole vampire bit. Might as well enjoy this new living in the sunlight thing."
Buffy wrapped her arms around
herself, wondering if she'd merely imagined Spike almost kissing her. She tried
to cover up the moment, the feelings going through her too unsettled to deal
with. "The sunlight's a good look for you," she said. "Even if it does make you hair almost blinding to look
at."
Her comment broke the tension
between them, reinstating the precarious camaraderie that they're been sharing
since Spike had woken up in the hospital. Spike turned, looking past Buffy's
head. "Come on. Let's go on that."
"On
what?"
"That," Spike replied,
pointing.
Buffy's eyes grew wide as she
realized what he meant. "Oh no. Ferris wheels are
among the things that are not mixy with Buffy."
"Aw, come on Slayer. You can't
tell me you're scared of a Ferris
wheel."
"I'm not scared! They just
make me�uncomfortable. Besides, why do you want to get on it anyway?"
Spike shrugged. "For
the view. I wanna see how the sun lights up the world."
"Fine," Buffy said,
deciding she couldn't deny him that. "But if I throw up, it's sooo your
fault."
"Lighten up, kitten. Be fun
for once in your life."
"Hey! I'm fun! I'm lots of
fun!" At Spike's raised eyebrow she asked with uncertainty trembling in
her voice, "You never had fun with me?"
"Well, there was some fun to be had," Spike replied
with a leer, letting Buffy know exactly
to what he was referring. Then he added, "But as far as just letting yourself have a good time with me, no. We were more about
secretive, guilty meetings in the dark."
"We're not in the dark
anymore."
"No, we're not."
Buffy looked down. "I had fun
with you sometimes�when I let myself. And not just the kinky
kind of fun."
"Yeah? When?"
"There�there was that night
with the kitten poker."
"You were drunk out of your
gourd, Slayer. Besides, you told me that night 'sucked' if I remember
correctly."
"I know I said that, but it
didn't really. Okay, maybe parts, but there was some fun, too. I�I wanted to be
with you, you know. I wanted to do things with you, let you be more like a
boyfriend, but I was afraid."
Spike didn't say anything for a
moment. He'd never imagined that Buffy had ever considered him as actual
boyfriend material. He wanted her to be with him, to have her heart belong to
him as much as his belonged to her, but the idea of say, going on actual dates
with Buffy had never really entered his mind. But now that it had� Spike pushed
the thought aside. Just because she'd felt that way back in Sunnydale certainly
didn't mean she did now. He wondered for a moment if the Immortal took her out
like that, and he felt the bile rise in his throat. "Don't know how well
it would've worked anyway," he said. "Would've been
sort of hard to hide us from the Scoobies if we were out on the town."
"Yeah, well, that's another
thing I regret�keeping us a secret like that."
Spike placed his hand on her
shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze. "No point on dwelling on it right
now, pet. Let's just enjoy our day, shall we?"
Buffy gave him a bright smile, and
Spike couldn't help but feel his heart soar. "Sounds like a deal to
me," she said.

***
*** ***
Angel paced his room, looking every
bit the part of a caged animal. Buffy and Spike should've been back already,
and the knowledge that they weren't infuriated him. He couldn't believe that
Buffy would be so na�ve as to just accept Spike becoming human. Didn't she know
that this had to be a bad thing? There was no way that the Powers would reward
Spike like that. To consider him worthy of that level of
redemption� It was ridiculous.
Angel knew something evil had to be
behind this. For all they knew, Spike had made some sort of deal with the
Senior Partners, probably just so he could trick Buffy into thinking he was
worth trusting and steal her away from Angel.
He kicked a piece of his bed frame.
This was not the way things were
supposed to happen. If Buffy didn't see how bad this was, well, he'd have to
tell her�and make sure she listened.
Spike would not get his destiny, or his girl. Angel wouldn't allow it.

***
*** ***
"See, this isn't so bad, is
it?"
Buffy tightened the grip she had on
Spike's leg. "It's very high, and I really wish this thing we're sitting
in didn't keep shaking. It feels like we're going to tip out."
"We're not going to tip
out," Spike said.
"We could. Wouldn't that be embarrassing�a
Slayer being done in by a Ferris wheel." Buffy frowned.
"Maybe it's a demonic Ferris wheel."
"It's not a demonic Ferris
wheel. Just relax, enjoy the view."
"But we're up so high�"
Buffy hated to admit it, but ever since she'd leapt from Glory's tower, high
places had not been on her list of favorite things.
Spike put an arm around her.
"No need to be nervous, Buffy. I'm here�I won't let anything happen to
you."
Buffy was amazed at how his touch
could manage to calm her and excite her at the same time. She looked over the
side, squeezing Spike's thigh as she fought off the vertigo. She leaned against
him, admitting to herself that the view from the top was pretty neat.
Spike, for his part, was beginning
to regret this little idea of his. Buffy's scent was assaulting him, and that
coupled with her nearness was driving him crazy. He'd thought that her scent
wouldn't still affect him like this now that he was a human, that it wouldn't
be this strong. But it was the same as it had always been, still calling to
him. He fought the urge to turn and bury his nose in her hair.
He could feel Buffy's nervousness
draining from her as she settled down beside him. He tried to get himself to
relax as well. This could be the last time he was this close to Buffy, the last
time he was surrounded by her glorious scent. At that thought, he tightened his
arm around her.
Buffy felt the hold Spike had on
her strengthen. Being in his arms again, even like this, was setting her
emotions into a tizzy. That small voice in the back of her mind that always seemed
to throw its two cents in where Spike was concerned was telling her she should
throw him off of her. But she didn't want to listen to that voice this time.
She wanted to be in Spike's arms.
She'd spent a year thinking he was dead, a year believing she'd never be near
him again, and now�
Buffy felt the tears rolling down
her cheeks before she even realized she was crying.
"Why are you crying,
luv?" Spike asked.
"You." Buffy felt Spike's grip loosen, but she
held on to him before he could manage to slip away. "No, wait. Let me
finish. I�I thought you were dust, and here you are, and I can touch you�"
"And that's a bad thing?"
"No! For all
your swagger, you can be really insecure sometimes, you know that? It's
just a big emotional thing, and�" Buffy placed her head against him.
"You're here, and you're real�oh god, Spike, you're real."
"Yeah, I guess I am."
Buffy kept crying, even as the ride
came to an end, and Spike led her over to a bench. He held on to her, quietly
reassuring her until she finally looked up him, wiping at her cheeks. "I'm
sorry. I didn't mean to go all weepy girl on
you."
"As long as the tears meant
you're happy I'm back, then it's all okay, pet."
Buffy laughed,
lighting punching his arm.
"Of course I'm happy you're back. And I would've been just as happy it I'd
heard about it months ago, too."
Spike looked at her sheepishly.
"Yeah, I knows I was a right git about
that."
"Damn straight."
Spike brushed the last of her tears
out of her eyes. "You were the first thing I asked about when I popped out
of the amulet, wanted to know if you were all right. I tried to get back to you
then, too, but I couldn't. And then when I could, well, I got scared, Buffy. I
was afraid that you really hadn't meant it when you said you loved me, and that
maybe you wouldn't be all that happy to see me. Angel said you were doing well
in your new life, and I was afraid I'd just be an intrusion."
"Oh, Angel said, huh? I barely
talked to Angel after the Hellmouth closed, Spike. We went to L.A. immediately
after to regroup, and I gave him a brief description of what went down, but
that was it. No one wanted to trust the new CEO of the Law Firm of Evil, myself
included. Anything Angel knew about my 'new life' was reported back to him by
his spies. I guess he figured with all the money he was getting from Wolfram
and Hart he could finally get someone to do his stalking for him."
"Yeah, I heard about
that," Spike said.
"I still haven't gotten over
him agreeing to run that place. What was he thinking? I mean, taking evil down
by joining forces with it? Is he a complete idiot?"
"Yes,
actually. I don't know
what all that forehead does, but it certainly isn't
storing any brain matter."
"It�s to shield his beady
little eyes."
Spike gaped. "Did you just
agree with my Angel insult�and then add to it?"
"Yep, sure did." Buffy's
mood darkened again. "Some of my girls are dead because of him. His damn
stunt with Evil Inc. almost brought on an apocalypse."
"He had other reasons for it,
too." Spike thought for a moment that maybe he shouldn't spill his grandsire's
big secret to Buffy, but then he remember how much he hated the guy. "Not
sure on the specifics, but it turns out he had a son with a resurrected Darla. The
kid got raised in a hell dimension, came back all wonky
in the head, and Peaches made a deal with Wolfram and Hart to try to give the
boy a normal life, or some such rot. Erased everyone's memory of him and had a
new life fabricated for his son."
Buffy's jaw fell, and for a moment
she said nothing at all. When she did speak, the best she could come up with
was, "You're kidding, right?"
"Nope. Apparently there was
all sorts of badness surrounding it, too, with Wesley trying to get the kid
away from Angel because of a buggered up prophecy claiming Angel would make the
kid a light snack."
"And you say Angel erased
everyone's memory of everything pertaining to his son? That,
too?"
"Yeah."
"How convenient," Buffy muttered.
"What do you mean, pet?"
"I don't know� Just, well, if
there was badness, and Angel made a deal with evil
that made it all go 'poof�' Convenient in a creepy, wrong
sort of way."
Spike frowned, thinking about how
Wesley had said something about how Angel had seemed more willing to let Connor
die than let the memories he'd had erased be released. "You think it was
more about Angel than Connor?"
"I can't say for sure since I
don't know the whole story, but knowing what I do about Angel, I'd say yes.
He's much more likely to try to gloss over problems than actually face them. And
hey, if it 'never happened,' then it's one less thing to weigh down his
guilt-ridden soul." Buffy punctuated the last setence
with a roll of her eyes.
Spike's brow knitted. "Since when were you so down on Angel, Buffy?"
"I'm not really down on him, I'm just�seeing him a little differently these days. Although
I hope he at least learned from this." Buffy looked down for a second
before looking back up, and Spike could see a hint of insecurity in her eyes. "Did
I know he had a son before he did the memory wipe, or did he keep it from
me?"
"Dunno, pet. Never came
up."
"I don't know which bothers me
more�the thought that Angel would keep something that big from me, or that he'd
steal any of my memories like that. If something happened to me, I want to
remember it."
Spike stroked her hair, hating the
fact that Angel still had the power to put that look in Buffy's eyes, even after
all she'd seen him do, that he could reduce her to the unsure little girl she'd
been with him in the past. Sometimes he wanted to shake her, make her see what
he really was, but he had long since given up on erasing all the love she felt
for the other man. "I'm sure which ever one it was, he wasn't trying to
hurt you," Spike said, not sure why he was defending Angel. He figured it
was because he didn't like seeing Buffy upset.
Buffy put on her best smile then,
taking Spike's hand. "I really don't want to talk about Angel anymore
right now. We were supposed to be having fun, right?"
Spike smiled back, deciding it
would be best just to leave things there for now. He knew that there were
several unfinished conversations in the exchange they'd just had, but he didn't
want to ruin this day. "Right. Ready
to get to it, pet?"
"You betcha."
Buffy and Spike stood, their hands still intertwined.

***
*** ***

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