I'm Sorry William
folder
-Buffy the Vampire Slayer › Het - Male/Female › Buffy/Spike(William)
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
11
Views:
8,187
Reviews:
82
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
-Buffy the Vampire Slayer › Het - Male/Female › Buffy/Spike(William)
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
11
Views:
8,187
Reviews:
82
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer (BtVS), nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
I'm Sorry William_5
Thato Celestria, Gillian, KD, Holly, Mandi, Petra, Mari, Jess, Draconiansrock, Jen, E.F. and Tcjmfan. For your reviews. They are what keep me writing.
Song in the last chapter was Phil Collins, Against all odds.
I’m Sorry William_5
“I know the slayer in you is strong and independent. T’s one of the things I love about you. Your strength, and resilience. But sometimes the woman in you needs taking care of and that doesn’t make you weak or needy. It just makes you human. I want to be there for all of it Buffy, all of you. I can’t stand the fact that I made you cry by pretending to be insensitive, and I want to spend the rest of my un-life making it up to you.”
She was trembling. He could feel the soft tremors her body was making. He closed his eyes and inhaled. ~ Buffy. ~ Spike pulled her closer, wrapping his arms around her waist. “Will you stay with me tonight? Let me hold you?”
She raised her rimmrimmed puffy eyes, right into the piercing blue of his. “Yes. I want you to hold me all night. I never want you to let me go.” She leaned forward and kissed him softly, fingers curling into the hair at the base of his neck.
Spike kissed her back, softly, tenderly. He felt her fingers running through his curls. When they broke the kiss so Buffy could breathe Spike was panting too.
She smiled up at him. Her eyes widened. “How come I didn’t know you had this bathroom in your new crypt?”
Spike laughed, a deep melodic rumble. “We’re not in the crypt right now Buffy. Would you like to see the rest of my house?”
“Your house? what do you mean your house?”
“I bought it.”
“You bought it?”
“Would you stop repeating everything I say? Bloody annoying it is.”
“I…how? How did you…and When? Why…What…”
“Maybe you should sit down Luv.” He said steering her towards the toilet.
“Had some help from a friend of mine. He helped me with some documents so I could become a legal person and get my money. I used some of it to buy this house. I figured if I was going to be good enough for you…good enough for the bit, then I’d have to start by acquiring the things that you would want.”
“And what would that be?” Buffy snapped. Spike – her vampire - buying a house when she couldn’t even afford her mortgage payments gave her a major case of the wiggins.
“A home. It represents security. A loving man, who treats you well and loves you. Someone you can share your whole life with, Slaying and all. Some women want families…I don’t know if you do…I want to get to know everything about you, your dreams and hopes…”
“I’m not allowed to have those, I’m the slayer. I was made to die. Young.”
“Not while I’m around. If you let me I’d never leave your side. I’d give you everything…let me show you…”
“I’m scared…I’m scared to give in to my feelings But it’s starting to hurt more not to…” Silent tears rolled down her cheeks.
Spike got to his knees in front of her. He gently wiped her tears away.
“You can be scared. Here with me. Don’t walk away from this just because you are scared. Hell Buffy I am terrified. I love you so much, you make me want to be a better man every day, every minute.”
“I love you.” She looked into his eyes when she said it. Spike felt the tears welling up in his eyes as the words tumbled out of her mouth. He was overwhelmed. He leaned forward and bent his head to her lap, resting it gently on her legs. He lost the power of speech, he was stunned.
Buffy stroked his hair gently. He sat there for a few minutes. Silently. Just letting her stroke his hair, trying to rein in his out of control emotions.
“Buffy?” He whispered.
“Yeah?”
“I…”
“I know. I do love you Spike…I…I want to be loved by you.” Spike sat up and looked into her eyes. He saw her sincerity. He reached out his hand to gently cup her cheek. “Come on luv.” Taking her hand in his he led her to his bedroom.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Why do you think she was so upset?” Willow asked. “I hope it’s not still about where she was…”
“She was jealous.” Dawn smiled happily. They were walking home.
“Jealous?” Willow repeated. “Of who?”
“Spike. She thinks he was on a date.”
“So?”
“So she was jealous.” Dawn said exasperated. “She has a thing for him.”
“No she does not!” Willow protested. Tara stayed silent.
“We’ll see.” Was all Dawn would say.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Buffy walked around the room. She couldn’t believe her eyes. His bedroom was huge. There was a king-sized four-poster bed, beautiful intricate designs carved into the wood. It was draped in a sky blue comforter. all of the walls were painted baby blue. The wall that held the window had thick dark blue velvet drapes pulled tightly closed. She noticed two sets of closet doors, and a beautiful mahogany dresser. There was also a mahogany vanity table with a beautifully framed mirror. “Spike…oh god it’s beautiful” Buffy turned to him with a smile.
“If you don’t like the…”
“It’s perfect.”
“Will you stay? All night? I don’t want you to leave…”
“No. I want to stay…I just have to call Dawn.” She said shyly. “I don’t want her to worry…”
“Phone’s by the bed Luv.” Spike went to the dresser and pulled out a pair of black silk men’s pajamas, “Here. Put this I’m I’m going to go to the bathroom to change…” He handed Buffy the pajamas and grabbed another pair. He quickly left the room to give her some privacy.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Hello?”
“Hey Will…can I speak with Dawn?”
“Sure.” Willow replied handing the phone to Dawn. She wanted to ask Buffy about Spike, but not over the phone. She’d wait until Buffy got home.
“Hello?”
“Hey. Will you be ok if I stay the night with Spike? We have a lot to talk about…”
“I’ll be fine. No problem at all, besides Willow and Tara are home.”
“Ok. Just…don’t tell them where I am. Don’t tell them anything…I want to tell them myself. Please?”
“Kay.”
“Bye Dawn. I love you.”
“I love you too Buff.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~ Ok. That was easy. But Dawn loves Spikedon’don’t know how anyone else is going to…wait. I care why? Don’t give a damn what they think. It’s my life. ~
There was a gentle knock at the door. “Are you decent?”
“Does it matter?”
“Yeah. It really does.”
“I’m dressed.”
The door opened slowly and immediately his eyes sought hers. She felt the thrill of anticipation; the desperate need to be in his arms. She met him halfway into the room.
She threw her arms around his neck, clinging desperately. Spike wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her body against his.
He picked her up gently, as if to carry her across the threshold, and walked slowly over to the bed. He laid her down, never brng eng eye contact.
Spike crawled into bed with her and wrapped his arms securely around her. “Spike?”
“Yeah Luv.”
“Aren’t we going to…I mean you haven’t even kissed me…”
Spike leaned over her and kissed her softly, tenderly, as if she were the most important thing in the world. To him, she was. He pulled back and looked into her eyes. “Goodnight Luv.”
“Good night.”
Spike held her, when she moved around in her sleep; his body molded itself to hers.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“What did she say?”
“She’s not coming home tonight. She said she’d see us in the morning.”
“Where is she staying.”
“Out. She wants to tell you herself.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Buffy awoke in the morning curled on her side, Spike was wrapped around her from behind, his body flush against hers. She could feel his hardness pressed into her back. His arm was around her, the palm of his hand flat against her stomach, nose buried in her hair. She could feel his cool breath against her skin.
Buffy ran her fingers over his arm and down to his hand cupping her stomach. She laced her fingers with his and smiled.
“You awake?” He whispered.
“Yeah. I just woke up.” She pressed back, more firmly against him.
“You ok? No regrets?”
“Only one.” She felt him stiffen, his body going rigid. He wasn’t expecting her next words. “That it took me so damn long to realize what an amazing man you are, and how loved I feel when I’m in your arms.”
She felt bod body relax against her. “I’m sorry Spike. I’m so sorry…I should have realized…but I didn’t and I am so glad it’s not to late…I’m glad you are willing to give me another chance at making this work…”
“We are going to be amazing together Luv. Wait and see, we’ll be unstoppable.”
“We already were, and then I had to go and hurt you…” She rolled over and looked into his eyes. “I don’t ever want to do that again.” She leaned forward and brushed her lips against his.
Spike pulled back and looked into her eyes. “All I want… all I want is to make you happy Buffy…”
“Make love to me…” She whispered reaching for him.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Please let me know if you enjoyed this chapter…
Song in the last chapter was Phil Collins, Against all odds.
I’m Sorry William_5
“I know the slayer in you is strong and independent. T’s one of the things I love about you. Your strength, and resilience. But sometimes the woman in you needs taking care of and that doesn’t make you weak or needy. It just makes you human. I want to be there for all of it Buffy, all of you. I can’t stand the fact that I made you cry by pretending to be insensitive, and I want to spend the rest of my un-life making it up to you.”
She was trembling. He could feel the soft tremors her body was making. He closed his eyes and inhaled. ~ Buffy. ~ Spike pulled her closer, wrapping his arms around her waist. “Will you stay with me tonight? Let me hold you?”
She raised her rimmrimmed puffy eyes, right into the piercing blue of his. “Yes. I want you to hold me all night. I never want you to let me go.” She leaned forward and kissed him softly, fingers curling into the hair at the base of his neck.
Spike kissed her back, softly, tenderly. He felt her fingers running through his curls. When they broke the kiss so Buffy could breathe Spike was panting too.
She smiled up at him. Her eyes widened. “How come I didn’t know you had this bathroom in your new crypt?”
Spike laughed, a deep melodic rumble. “We’re not in the crypt right now Buffy. Would you like to see the rest of my house?”
“Your house? what do you mean your house?”
“I bought it.”
“You bought it?”
“Would you stop repeating everything I say? Bloody annoying it is.”
“I…how? How did you…and When? Why…What…”
“Maybe you should sit down Luv.” He said steering her towards the toilet.
“Had some help from a friend of mine. He helped me with some documents so I could become a legal person and get my money. I used some of it to buy this house. I figured if I was going to be good enough for you…good enough for the bit, then I’d have to start by acquiring the things that you would want.”
“And what would that be?” Buffy snapped. Spike – her vampire - buying a house when she couldn’t even afford her mortgage payments gave her a major case of the wiggins.
“A home. It represents security. A loving man, who treats you well and loves you. Someone you can share your whole life with, Slaying and all. Some women want families…I don’t know if you do…I want to get to know everything about you, your dreams and hopes…”
“I’m not allowed to have those, I’m the slayer. I was made to die. Young.”
“Not while I’m around. If you let me I’d never leave your side. I’d give you everything…let me show you…”
“I’m scared…I’m scared to give in to my feelings But it’s starting to hurt more not to…” Silent tears rolled down her cheeks.
Spike got to his knees in front of her. He gently wiped her tears away.
“You can be scared. Here with me. Don’t walk away from this just because you are scared. Hell Buffy I am terrified. I love you so much, you make me want to be a better man every day, every minute.”
“I love you.” She looked into his eyes when she said it. Spike felt the tears welling up in his eyes as the words tumbled out of her mouth. He was overwhelmed. He leaned forward and bent his head to her lap, resting it gently on her legs. He lost the power of speech, he was stunned.
Buffy stroked his hair gently. He sat there for a few minutes. Silently. Just letting her stroke his hair, trying to rein in his out of control emotions.
“Buffy?” He whispered.
“Yeah?”
“I…”
“I know. I do love you Spike…I…I want to be loved by you.” Spike sat up and looked into her eyes. He saw her sincerity. He reached out his hand to gently cup her cheek. “Come on luv.” Taking her hand in his he led her to his bedroom.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Why do you think she was so upset?” Willow asked. “I hope it’s not still about where she was…”
“She was jealous.” Dawn smiled happily. They were walking home.
“Jealous?” Willow repeated. “Of who?”
“Spike. She thinks he was on a date.”
“So?”
“So she was jealous.” Dawn said exasperated. “She has a thing for him.”
“No she does not!” Willow protested. Tara stayed silent.
“We’ll see.” Was all Dawn would say.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Buffy walked around the room. She couldn’t believe her eyes. His bedroom was huge. There was a king-sized four-poster bed, beautiful intricate designs carved into the wood. It was draped in a sky blue comforter. all of the walls were painted baby blue. The wall that held the window had thick dark blue velvet drapes pulled tightly closed. She noticed two sets of closet doors, and a beautiful mahogany dresser. There was also a mahogany vanity table with a beautifully framed mirror. “Spike…oh god it’s beautiful” Buffy turned to him with a smile.
“If you don’t like the…”
“It’s perfect.”
“Will you stay? All night? I don’t want you to leave…”
“No. I want to stay…I just have to call Dawn.” She said shyly. “I don’t want her to worry…”
“Phone’s by the bed Luv.” Spike went to the dresser and pulled out a pair of black silk men’s pajamas, “Here. Put this I’m I’m going to go to the bathroom to change…” He handed Buffy the pajamas and grabbed another pair. He quickly left the room to give her some privacy.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Hello?”
“Hey Will…can I speak with Dawn?”
“Sure.” Willow replied handing the phone to Dawn. She wanted to ask Buffy about Spike, but not over the phone. She’d wait until Buffy got home.
“Hello?”
“Hey. Will you be ok if I stay the night with Spike? We have a lot to talk about…”
“I’ll be fine. No problem at all, besides Willow and Tara are home.”
“Ok. Just…don’t tell them where I am. Don’t tell them anything…I want to tell them myself. Please?”
“Kay.”
“Bye Dawn. I love you.”
“I love you too Buff.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~ Ok. That was easy. But Dawn loves Spikedon’don’t know how anyone else is going to…wait. I care why? Don’t give a damn what they think. It’s my life. ~
There was a gentle knock at the door. “Are you decent?”
“Does it matter?”
“Yeah. It really does.”
“I’m dressed.”
The door opened slowly and immediately his eyes sought hers. She felt the thrill of anticipation; the desperate need to be in his arms. She met him halfway into the room.
She threw her arms around his neck, clinging desperately. Spike wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her body against his.
He picked her up gently, as if to carry her across the threshold, and walked slowly over to the bed. He laid her down, never brng eng eye contact.
Spike crawled into bed with her and wrapped his arms securely around her. “Spike?”
“Yeah Luv.”
“Aren’t we going to…I mean you haven’t even kissed me…”
Spike leaned over her and kissed her softly, tenderly, as if she were the most important thing in the world. To him, she was. He pulled back and looked into her eyes. “Goodnight Luv.”
“Good night.”
Spike held her, when she moved around in her sleep; his body molded itself to hers.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“What did she say?”
“She’s not coming home tonight. She said she’d see us in the morning.”
“Where is she staying.”
“Out. She wants to tell you herself.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Buffy awoke in the morning curled on her side, Spike was wrapped around her from behind, his body flush against hers. She could feel his hardness pressed into her back. His arm was around her, the palm of his hand flat against her stomach, nose buried in her hair. She could feel his cool breath against her skin.
Buffy ran her fingers over his arm and down to his hand cupping her stomach. She laced her fingers with his and smiled.
“You awake?” He whispered.
“Yeah. I just woke up.” She pressed back, more firmly against him.
“You ok? No regrets?”
“Only one.” She felt him stiffen, his body going rigid. He wasn’t expecting her next words. “That it took me so damn long to realize what an amazing man you are, and how loved I feel when I’m in your arms.”
She felt bod body relax against her. “I’m sorry Spike. I’m so sorry…I should have realized…but I didn’t and I am so glad it’s not to late…I’m glad you are willing to give me another chance at making this work…”
“We are going to be amazing together Luv. Wait and see, we’ll be unstoppable.”
“We already were, and then I had to go and hurt you…” She rolled over and looked into his eyes. “I don’t ever want to do that again.” She leaned forward and brushed her lips against his.
Spike pulled back and looked into her eyes. “All I want… all I want is to make you happy Buffy…”
“Make love to me…” She whispered reaching for him.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Please let me know if you enjoyed this chapter…