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What Was I Thinking!?!	By : MrsMuir Category: > Buffy/Spike(William) > Buffy/Spike(William) Views: 7784 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer (BtVS), nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 3
- 4
- 5
Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Buffy took a deep breath
before bounding down the back steps to meet her father. He was climbing out of
his patrol car with an eye toward the barn. It was just what everybody needed, her
father finding the alcohol and marijuana that some of the kids had brought.
Thankful that she hadn�t been indulging, she picked up speed as he started
walking toward the party.

�Daddy,� Buffy called. �What
are you doing here?�

�Came to check on you and
this party that the MacDonald kids are throwing,� Sheriff Hank Summers said.
His gaze swung from Buffy to the barn and back.

�Everything is fine,� Buffy
said, standing between him and her friends.

�That�s not what I heard.�

Father and daughter stared
at each other for a moment. Buffy was glaring more than staring. Why did her
father always feel that he had to do this? Checking up on her, asking endless
questions of where she�d been, never trusting her to do the right thing. She
was always trying but somehow it was never enough. His head tilted and then he
cupped her cheek turning her face to the side.

�And it seems that what I
heard was right,� Hank said, dropping his hand with a look of disgust on his
face.

�Hi there,� Lindsey said
from behind Buffy.

She turned gratefully to her
friends that were coming towards them. Cordelia was right beside her brother.
Her face clearly showed her displeasure at being checked up on.

�Everything all right?� Lindsey asked.

The back door slammed shut
and everyone turned to watch Spike as he came to join them. Buffy almost smiled
when she saw that he had put on a button down shirt that hung freely. Spike met
her gaze before turning to her father. He put his hand out.

�Hello, I�m William,� Spike
said, his English accent even more pronounced than before.

Hank stared at his hand for
a moment then tentatively shook it.

�Are you this Spike
character I heard about?�

�Yes, sir, my nickname is
Spike.�

Buffy was proud of him. He
was acting every bit a gentlemen with her father. It impressed her that he
would take the time and effort to try to make friends with her dad.

�Are you in a gang or
something back in LA?� Hank questioned, as his stance changed. His feet widened
a bit and his hands rested on his utility belt. He was in typical cop mode but that
didn�t faze Spike at all.

�No, I�m not,� Spike said
with a smile. �I got the nickname when I was twelve and was playing at being in
a gang with a bunch of neighborhood kids back in London. The worst thing we got into was letting a mouse
loose in Mrs. Crockett�s kitchen.�

Lindsey snickered behind
them. Buffy shot him a dirty look but he only grinned at her. Obviously he knew
more about Spike�s activities and judging by his reaction, Spike wasn�t as innocent
as he was pretending to be.

�I got a call from Riley,�
Hank said, turning to look at his daughter. �He said your friend beat him up.�

�Daddy�,� Buffy whined.

�Sir,� Spike interrupted
her. He waited until Hank was looking at him again. �I admit that I did hit
Riley but it was only in defense of your daughter. He called her a name that no
woman should ever be called.�

�Yeah, he told me what he
called her and why,� Hank said. �And from the look of her neck and the other
stories I�ve heard tonight, I�d say he was right.�

Buffy�s view of her father
was suddenly blocked by Spike. He had stepped between them. Her stomach lurched
in fear that her father would decide to arrest Spike for some trumped up charge
of assault or something.

�I apologize, sir,� Spike
said. His voice however had dropped to a dangerous level. Lindsey�s hand went
to his arm as if to hold him back. �But my mother always taught me to treat
women like ladies and Buffy hasn�t done anything to deserve to be called a
slut.�

�You listen here, kid,� Hank
snarled, stepping closer to Spike. �That�s my daughter and if she wouldn�t act
like a common tramp then she wouldn�t be called names. Now, move before I move
you.�

�Stop it,� Buffy said,
moving out from behind Spike. �I haven�t done anything. I�m still one of the
few damn virgins left in school. So, don�t call me names.� She took a deep
breath. She had no idea where the courage was coming from. Usually she just
took her father�s tirades then avoided him until he had calmed down. Maybe
after eighteen years of trying to please him and always falling short, she was
just tired of it. �And furthermore I�m eighteen so if I want to have sex with
him I will. It�s no one�s business.�

�Get your stuff,� Hank said,
grabbing her arm and pushing her toward the house. �You�re going home.�

�No, I�m not,� Buffy
shouted. �I�m staying here. There�s nothing you can do except kick me out of
the house. What�s that going to prove? Only that you�re a failure of a father
because your daughter had to drop out of school two months before graduation.
That I couldn�t go to college because I was supporting myself down at the diner
like your little�� She�d gone too far and she ducked when her father went to
slap her. She was sobbing when she stood back up. Spike�s arm came around her
as she stared at her father.

Three years ago she had
caught her father having an affair with a waitress. She was certain it was her
fault that her parents were having troubles. For a while she acted pretty wild
with a boy she�d been infatuated with. There had been some trouble but she
straightened up rather quickly when he had been sent away to juvenile
detention. Her parents were fighting a lot around that time. Then she had
discovered her father�s indiscretions. So, in order to make things better, she
had doubled her efforts to be the kind of daughter they wanted.

Looking at her father now,
she realized that no matter what she did, she would always be a disappointment
to him. Dawn, her little sister, though, would always be the apple of her
parents� eyes. She loved her sister in spite of it. It wasn�t the kid�s fault
that she was perfect in every way. It just made Buffy even more determined to
meet her goals to get out of town. Once she was gone, she was never going to
look back.

�I�m sorry, Daddy,� Buffy
whispered raggedly. �But I haven�t done anything I should be sorry for. I�m not
coming home and if you want to kick me out, then do it. I�ll talk to you
tomorrow.�

It was all she could do. She
turned and ran toward the field that led to the small pond on the back of the
ranch. Everything had fallen apart. She really liked being with Spike. No one
had ever made her feel so pretty, wanted, or liked. He would know now what a
fuck up she was and he wouldn�t want anything to do with her. Her sobs only
grew in intensity the further away she ran.

~~~~~~~

Spike was stunned. He hadn�t
figured on a family drama like this when he had come out of the back door. It
was supposed to just be him being a good boy, garnering the father�s like then
he could get back to seducing the girl. He turned to watch Buffy running before
returning his gaze to her father.

�You have a very precious
daughter,� Spike said truthfully. �She�s sweet, smart, a hard worker and she
tries. Yeah, I like her and yeah, we fooled around a little but she didn�t
deserve that or what Riley said to her.�

He didn�t wait to hear what
Hank said in reply. He turned to follow Buffy. She was out there, upset and
alone, and he wanted to comfort her. He did hear Cordelia�s comment about being
wrong about him though. It made him smile as he started to run through the field.

The night sky was clear with
a moon that helped to guide him. The further he moved away from the barn, the clearer
the soft sounds of her sobs became. It tore at him that this girl that he
thought was all sunshine fluff was really hiding such a broken heart. He cursed
himself for his earlier desire to just use her for a distraction from his own
pain. It would have made him no better than most of the men he knew. Men he
didn�t want to be like. A man like her father was.

The pond was just up ahead
but he slowed down the closer he came. He needed to get his own emotions in
control before he tried to tackle hers. She was sitting with her arms around
her legs and her face buried in her knees, as she cried.

�Buffy,� he called softly
when he got close to her. She didn�t even look up at him but only muffled
something about leaving her alone. He wasn�t about to do that. He sat behind
her with a bent leg on each side of her. His arms wrapped around her. There
wasn�t any need for words just yet. She needed to get everything out but she
turned to him, kissing his neck while her hands dived under his shirt. He
grabbed them. �Not so fast, kitten.�

�Spike, please,� Buffy
pleaded, still kissing along his jaw.

�I just ended a relationship
with a girl who was with me for a thousand reasons other than loving me,� Spike
said, refusing to let his body give in. �She wanted a boyfriend, she wanted sex
on demand, she wanted me to be whatever she needed me to be as long as she
didn�t have to love me back.�

Buffy stopped, pulling back
to look up at him. �You think I�m a selfish bitch, don�t you?�

�Yeah, but an adorable
bitch,� Spike said, with a smile. He tucked her hair behind her ear. �Look, I
really like you and I do want you but when we make love, I want it to be just the
two of us. Not a check on a list, a grudge against an old boyfriend, to get
back at Daddy or just to feel better. I�d prefer you to only be thinking of
me.�

�I�m not usually this bad,�
Buffy said, turning to face the pond again. �No one�s ever made me feel like I
do when you�re holding me.� She chuckled softly. �Nothing else seems to matter
when I�m kissing you.� She was silent for a moment then she whispered, �You did
say when, right?�

�Yeah,� Spike said, laughing
himself. �I said when because I really do plan on making love to you.�

�I�m not sticking around
after graduation,� Buffy said, her hands covering his that were around her
waist. �I�ve been accepted at Texas State University.�

�Why Texas?�

�Don�t laugh,� Buffy said.
�Promise?�

�Okay, I promise.� But he
was already grinning.

�One of the things on my
list is to be a Cowboy�s cheerleader,� Buffy said. �I�ve been a fan of theirs
for years. So, I figured being in Texas was the place to be.�

�What about being a Lakers�
girl?�

�That�s Cordelia�s dream,�
Buffy said. �We chose different states so there�s less chance of losing our
friendship over competition to be on the same squad. Besides the further away I
am from here the better off I�ll be.�

Spike kissed the top of her
head. �I understand. We can have a fling but don�t get my hopes up because
you�ll walk over my heart to wear blue and white.�

�Make me sound cold and
totally heartless, why don�t you?� Buffy squirmed around again so she could
look at him. �I have to get out of here. I can�t be one of those women that
never leave, marry some local boy and have a hundred kids.�

�Like your mom?�

�She gave up everything for
my Dad and I think she�s miserable because of it.�

�Can we be friends at least,
pet?� Spike asked. �Hang out this week, see what happens and try to have fun? I
promise I won�t try to hold you down even though I�m not a local boy that wants
to keep you barefoot and pregnant.�

�Okay, city boy,� Buffy
said, smiling up at him. �Make fun of the local yokels. It�s not nice. We might
have to initiate you.�

�Don�t think I�d like that.�

�Nope, you wouldn�t,� Buffy
said, kissing the corner of his mouth. �I guess we should get back up to the
house. Help Lindsey clean up and take care of the animals.�

�Animals?�

�Yeah, you know, the cows
and horses that have to put back in the barn,� Buffy said, standing. She
reached down and pulled him to his feet. �You do like cows and horses, don�t
you?�

Her grin was wicked as she
led him back. Spike had a feeling he was going to get initiated anyway. Buffy
would be leading the pack and he could only hope that she wouldn�t be too cruel
to him. He had a feeling by the time he got back to Los Angeles he would be ready to kiss the dirty sidewalks just for
being back in civilization. But then he remembered Buffy wouldn�t be there with
him. He decided that maybe if he prayed real hard this week would last forever.

to be continued�
- 3
- 4
- 5
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