Adult-FanFiction.org : Buffy

Heart's Desire	By : PencilNeck Category: -Buffy the Vampire Slayer > FemmeSlash - Female/Female > Buffy/Faith Views: 9582 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 2
Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer (BtVS), nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 34
- 35
A/N:� Thanks to everyone!� I�m indiscriminately thanking EVERYONE!� Step up and get your thanks!� It�s been fun, both to write and to be a part
of this huge and previously invisible (to me) community.� Hope you enjoyed the ride as much as I did.
xo

Chapter
35:� Absolute Beginners

Faith
crouches.� Shoulders hunched, feet in
boots planted firmly on the castle�s stone ledge.� Knees bent, parallel to her shoulders.� She�s a gargoyle.� She stares out at the shadows of trees swaying
gently, the breeze that touches them accelerating swiftly to play in her
hair.� She feels it on her cheek.� Cups her cigarette in her palm, protective.

She
brings it to her lips, deeply inhales.�
It fills her up, hurts her lungs.�
Finely crafted rings push from her lips.�
Smoke curls up, into her nostrils.�
French inhale.� She deftly flips
the white stick through her fingers like an expert drummer.� Flicks the filter with the nail edge of her
thumb to drop the ash.

Faith
knows all the tricks.� Cigarettes have
seen her best and her worst.� Hell, they
were accomplices to her worst.

One
final, exquisite, crackling drag.� The
tip is still red, blazing brighter when the wind hits.� Still weaving the blue-gray wisps she used to
love to watch float gracefully up from her mother�s ashtray.

She
sighs.� Holds out her hand and lets it
go.� It falls, spiraling downward.� Caught by wind and gravity, trailing a line
of red until it disappears from even Faith�s enhanced vision.

Faith
stands, working out the stiffness in her knees and calves.� Her eyes still fixed on the darkness below.

�Whatcha doin�?�� Buffy strolls up behind her.

�Nothing.�� Faith is defensive.� For a moment, she�s angry with Buffy for
interrupting.

�Looks
like something.�� Buffy lays her hand on
Faith�s back.� Peers over to see whatever
Faith�s hiding.

�Just
saying goodbye.�� With that touch, all is
forgiven.� Faith steps down from the
ledge.�

�Should
I be jealous?�� Buffy frowns.� �Is the Marlboro Man a threat?�

�We
had a thing for a while.�� Faith plays
along.� �Turns out he was trying to kill
me the whole time.� Can you believe
that?�

�Totally.�� Buffy likes this game.� �Never trust a man on a horse.�

Faith
rewards her with a short laugh.

�So,
why now?�� Buffy has questions. Well, one
question.

�Feels
like�� I dunno�� I got away with something, you know?�� Faith shrugs.�
�Time served, no strings.� Just a pat on the back and a shove out the
door.� I figure if whatever it is wants
me down here so bad�� Least I could do.�

Buffy
leans into Faith�s body, grinning up at her.

�Plus,
there�s this.�� Faith wraps her arm
around Buffy�s waist.� Gives her a quick
squeeze.� �And what we do��

�You
mean the slaying, right?�� Buffy�s on the
verge of a major blushing episode.� �Not
the� not that it�s not great, because it is� great.�� So, so great...� Amazing, even.� But life-changing?� That�s a whole��

�Relax.�� Faith can�t stop smiling.� For days now.�
�I meant the slaying.�

Buffy
looks both relieved and a little disappointed.�
Faith wonders how she manages it.

�It�s
like�� It�s war.� Every day.��
Faith searches for words.� She
hates words.� �The bad out there.� It wants us gone.� So I�m done giving them a head start.�

�Smoking
is evil.�� Buffy is all-knowing.� �We should make a public service
announcement.�

�Slow
down, B.�� Faith chuckles.� �It�s been two seconds.� Let�s wait a few years before hoppin� on that train.�

�Kay.�� Buffy kisses Faith�s nicotine laced lips.

�Aww.�� Willow opens
the door.� Leans against it, all
sappy-eyed and mocking.� �Xander,
look!� Snuggles!�

�I
don�t snuggle.�� Faith glowers.

�I
know what I saw.�� Xander steps on to the
roof.� �That was a classic example of
snuggles in action.�

Faith
growls in response.� It�s not the best
comeback.

�All
set?�� Buffy changes the subject.

�Yup.�� Willow hauls her overnight bag on to the
roof.

�I
got your stuff, Faith.�� Xander tries to
make nice.� �You sure pack light for a
girl.�

Buffy
has to hold Faith back.

�What�d
I say?�� Xander�s perplexed.� �What?�

�Take
a wild shot in the dark, Xander.�� Willow
rolls her eyes.� �Sheesh.�

�The
girl thing?� But she is a girl!�� Xander defends himself.� His fingers definitively point out the areas
of girliness on Faith�s body.� �I�m a master of �girl�!� I�ve had a lifetime of study.� I can spot �girl� a mile away!�

�Which is exactly how far they should stay away from you.�� Buffy smirks, stepping into the painted red
circle.

�At
least.�� Faith sidles up behind
Buffy.� Drops her backpack on the ground
beside her.

�Renee
is a brave one.�� Willow looks
around.� Kicks the handle of her bag back
into the circle.�

�Or
crazy.�� Faith adds.

�Or
lucky.�� Buffy leans over.� Kisses Xander�s cheek.

�It�s
hard to tell.�� Willow winks at
Xander.� Pushes him just outside the red
line.� Raises her arms.

There�s
a pop.

Xander
is befuddled.� The look on his face
doesn�t leave him.� Not while he stares
at the empty circle.� Not while he turns
and goes inside, down the stairs and back to his room. Not while he showers and
gets ready for bed.

�Deep
thoughts?�� Renee turns to face him.� The sheets pull against her body.

The
look he�s carried slips away so easily.�
Replaced by something soft and needing.

�Nope.�� Xander steps toward her.� He smiles a little.� �I can never seem to get past �girl�.�

********************

There�s
a pop.

Willow
opens her eyes.� Takes in the ornate
room.� Carved pillars, wide windows.� High ceilings adorned with faded frescoes.� She smiles.

Faith
staggers forward.� Unsteady.

Buffy
beds over, holding her stomach.� Fighting
the nausea.

�Greetings
friends!�� Andrew approaches.� �Welcome to Bella Roma!�

Buffy
raises her head.� Sees Andrew.� Pukes on the marble floor.

�Eeeew!�� Andrew
complains, taking a step back.� �I just
had that polished.�

�Sorry
about that.�� Willow apologizes for
Buffy.� �It takes some getting used to.�

�I�m
not good with vomit.�� Andrew takes a
step back.� He looks pale and
uneasy.� �My mom always said I had a
delicate constitution.�

�You?�� Willow smirks.� Snaps her fingers.� The colourful pile of tuna on rye
disappears.� �I don�t believe it.�

�No,
it�s true.� Jonathan used to try to make
me�� Oh, that was sarcasm.�� Andrew shifts his weight.� �Can we maybe move away from the scene of
the��

�Spew?�� Faith inquires.� Trying to look less malicious than she�s
being.� �Retch?� Puke?�

�I
was going to say incident.�� Andrew
swallows some saliva.� He takes a few
steps down the long hallway.

Faith
uses one arm to grab her backpack from the floor.� The other to catch Buffy by the elbow.

�I
got what�s mine.�� Faith nods.� �Lead the way.�

Willow
catches up to Andrew, looking back at Faith.�
Faith grins at her, nodding.

Faith
turns her attentions back to Buffy.�
Hefts her backpack over her shoulder.�
Lets Buffy lean on her as they walk.�
Buffy groans with every step.

�All
those bags you sent earlier� All Buffy�s?��
Andrew whispers to Willow.� Turns
back to inspect Buffy cautiously.� �Does
she look a little green to you, still?�

�She�s
probably fine.�� Willow doesn�t
check.� �She usually only pukes once
after this type of thing.� But this one
time?� She had some bad seafood or
something and she was totally barfing like� like a geyser!� Like Old Faithful, but less predictable and
way more often and just when you thought she had nothing left to give��

�I
have a delicate constitution!�� Andrew
manages that before quickly covering his mouth.�
He runs off down the hall in a panic.

Willow
turns to gloat.� Faith drops her
backpack, raises her hand.� High five.

�Go
team.�� Buffy glares at them.

�It
was just a little fun, Buffy.�� Willow�s
look of triumph fades.

�And
it�s only Andrew.�� Faith backs Willow
up.

�Either
of you evil masterminds happen to know where we�re
going?�� Buffy asks them both.� �What room?�
What floor?� Which wing?�

Faith
shrugs.� Looks to Willow.� Willow looks back at Faith.� Then they both look down at the floor.

�Seemed
like a good idea at the time.�� Willow
mumbles.

********************

�Finally!�� Buffy groans, falling dramatically on to the
giant four poster bed.�

�We�re
here now.�� Faith drops her
backpack.� �I�ll run you a bath to make
it up to you.�

�You�d
better.�� Buffy leans up.� �That was forty-five minutes of my life I�ll
never get back.�

�I
still say it was worth it.�� Faith calls
back from the bathroom.� �And totally
funny.�

�Maybe
it was a little funny.�� Buffy smiles up
at the carved angels on the ceiling.�
�Just a little.�

�So
you forgive me?�� Faith leans against the
doorframe.� The sound of water hitting
ceramic resonates behind her.

�Depends
on if there�s bubbles.�� Buffy looks skeptical.� �There are bubbles, right?�

�Just
a sec.�� Faith quickly disappears,
looking a little panicked.� Struts back,
her old confidence returning with her.�
�Yep.� Bubbles.�

�Nice
moves.�� Buffy giggles.� �Very smooth.��

�I
get the feeling you�re making fun of me.��
Faith raises a brow.� Steps
closer.�

�Me?�� Buffy creeps back on the bed.� �Never.�
I�m in awe of your moves.� You
have excellent moves.�

�I
do, don�t I?�� Faith grins.� Crawls over Buffy�s body, catlike.� Hovers over her, only inches away.

�This
one�s looking pretty good.�� Buffy�s
breathless.� �Move-wise.�

�Aw,
gross.�� Dawn walks through the open
door.� �Seriously, guys.� Leave me some tiny shred of sanity.�

Buffy
groans.� Pushes Faith off.� Faith rolls to the side of the bed, almost
giggling.

�Your
timing sucks, as always.�� Buffy hops to
her feet.� Gives Dawn a heartfelt, extra
long hug.

�And
you still don�t know how to close a door.��
Dawn returns the favour.�

�D.�� Faith nods, getting up reluctantly from the
bed.� �Nice tan.�

�Oh,
you can tell?�� Dawn spins in a circle.

�You�re
practically toasted.�� Faith wanders back
to the bathroom.� �B, your bath�s ready.�

Buffy
makes an apologetic face.

�It�s
cool, go.�� Dawn gestures to the
bathroom.� �I just came to make sure you
were all tucked in. Wasn�t planning a big family reunion.�

�Love
you.�� Buffy kisses Dawn on the
cheek.� Walks to the bathroom door,
stopping to give Faith a quick peck.�
�You too.�

The
bathroom door closes with Buffy behind it.

Faith
wanders over to a large armchair.� Gets
comfortable.

Dawn
hovers by the door.

�How�s
life?�� Faith starts.

�Same
old.�� Dawn leans against the frame.� �I�m still working.� Still training.� Still losing sleep over old books written by
dead people in dead languages.�

�But
you�re good.�� Faith wants to know.� �You�re better.�

�I
think so.�� Dawn shrugs.� �A little.�

�Good.�� Faith nods.�
�Andrew treating you okay?�

�He�s
kinda over-protective.� Like a little Mini-Buffy.�� Dawn furrows her brow.� �It�s weird.�

Faith
smiles a bit.

�Like, weird for him.��
Dawn clarifies.� �I scraped my
knee last week, and he totally freaked.�
Ran screaming for a friggin� medic!� And he kept mumbling something under his
breath.� Sounded like �chain of pain�?�

Faith
laughs out loud.

�What?�� Dawn looks frustrated.� Then she glares.� �Did you say something?�

�Wasn�t
just me.�� Faith explains.� �We all explained a few things.� Didn�t think he�d take it to heart.�

�Oh
my god.�� Dawn is aghast.� �You guys��

�Are
making sure you stay out of trouble.��
Faith tilts her head.� Changes the
subject.� �Speaking of trouble, you heard
from Colin?�

�Not
lately.�� Dawn looks down and away.

�You
will.�� Faith leans back.� �Boy�s a goner.�

�As
in gone.�� Dawn has her hurt face
on.� �He emailed every day since I got
here, for like three whole months.� I
asked him to visit.� He said he
would.� But I haven�t heard from him in
weeks.�

�I�m
sure he�s just busy.�� Faith isn�t really
sure.� There just can�t be any other
explanation.� �Guys can suck like that.�

Dawn
shrugs.� Her fingers tremble as they
trace down her cheek.� Following the path
of her scar.

Faith
stands up.� In a blink she�s caught
Dawn�s hand in hers.

�Don�t.�� Faith holds it tight.

�I
should have let Willow fix it.�� Dawn�s
voice catches.� �I should have let her��

�No.�� Faith pulls Dawn to the mirror.� �Not if it means something.�

Faith
turns Dawn to face herself.�

�I�m
ugly.�� Dawn tries to look away.

�You�re
you.�� Faith pulls up her shirt.� �And I�m me.�

Dawn
looks down to Faith�s stomach.� Sees it
for the first time, the scar there.� It�s
longer, deeper than she�d imagined.

�This
is me, Dawn.�� Faith grabs her hand.� Touches it to the raised white mark.� �This is who I was, who I am.� It�s a line I crossed.� This scar� it� God, I suck at this stuff.�

Dawn
follows the edge of it with the tips of her fingers.� Delicately.�

�Everything
that made this scar�� Faith takes a
breath, starts again.� �It happened.� It means something.� And it�s mine.�

Faith
huffs in frustration.� �You get what I�m
trying to say?�

Dawn
reaches the end of the road.� Stands up,
meeting Faith�s eyes.�

Gently,
she takes Faith�s hand.� Raises it to her
cheek.� Allows Faith to travel the thin
red range with her fingertips.

�Everything
that made this scar.�� Dawn repeats in a
wavering voice.� �It happened.� I-It means something...�

Faith
waits.� Her hand moving away from the
stripe on Dawn�s cheek.� Stopping on
Dawn�s shoulder.

�And
it�s mine.�� Dawn exhales heavily.

�And
if Colin can�t see past it to the hotness of you?�� Faith pulls her in.� �Then he�s a douche.�

Dawn
snorts.� Pulls back, giving Faith a wry
smile.

�You
don�t suck at this stuff as much as you think.��

�Well,
don�t go telling everybody.�� Faith
sniffs.� Takes a step back.� �I�m not advice-guy, or whatever.�

�Gotcha.�� Dawn goes for the door.� �Wouldn�t want people to know that you�re
smart, or kind, or insightful��

�Start
with that again, and you�ll be dealing with the old me.�� Faith throws a pillow at her.� �You got that?�

�Yipe!�� Dawn dodges
the pillow, barely.� �I�ll behave!�

�You�d
better.�� Faith stares her down.

Dawn
giggles.� Closes the door behind her.

�You
did good.��
Buffy makes her presence known.

�Heard
that?�� Faith looks uncomfortable.

�Hard
not to.�� Buffy wraps the towel tight
around her chest.� Steps up to
Faith.� �Thank you.�

�Didn�t
do anything.�� Faith stiffens.� Buffy�s arms close around her.� Buffy�s head falls against her chest.� Buffy�s breath warms the skin at her
neck.� Buffy�s body, not pulling away,
not leaving her.

In
time, there�s a change.� For a moment,
Faith�s mind lets go of some past hurts, some little defenses.� Her body relaxes.� Her breath slows.� Her arms reach out, hands longing to touch
Buffy�s skin.� Her head bows, resting
against Buffy�s cheek.�

�Thank
you.�� Buffy repeats.� She knows Faith didn�t hear it the first
time.� Didn�t really understand.

Faith
leans into the comfort of Buffy�s arms, Buffy�s body.� And it�s safe, for just this moment, to
accept gratitude without fear of it being stolen away or twisted into
blame.� Faith nuzzles into Buffy�s neck,
mumbling.� But Buffy hears it.

�You�re
welcome.�

********************

Willow
opens the door to her room.� Looks
around, inspecting the walls and tabletops.�
No signs of Kennedy.� With a sigh,
she opens the closet door.� Hangers sway,
empty on the rail.� She heaves her bag on
to the bed.� Unzips it and starts to
unpack.

�There
you go, lonely tee-shirt.�� Willow pats it, smoothing it over the
hanger.� �There�ll be more clothes to
keep you company in a minute.� That�s
more than I can say for little old me.��
She reaches into her bag.�
�See?� A nice friendly
sweater!� You guys can hang out!� Get it?�
Hang?�

�Talking
to yourself?��
Kennedy smirks at the doorway.�
�You are in serious need of a good fu-unh!��

At
the sound of Kennedy�s voice, Willow leaps the space from the closet to her
girlfriend�s arms.� �Missed you.�

�Me
too.�� Kennedy lifts Willow up, whirling
her around.�

�Wooo, dizzy!�� Willow
cautions.

Kennedy
puts her down.� Backs up a step, just to
look into Willow�s eyes.� She had really
missed those eyes.

�Why
aren�t I in your room?�� Willow swats
away the sappy look on Kennedy�s face.�
�I got all excited coming here, and then I got all sad when I got here!� You know I can�t deal with big emotional
roller coasters!� I�m not even good with
real roller coasters� except for the kiddie
ones�� But then I get made fun of because
�ooh, the big scary powerful witch likes the baby coasters�, and that�s just
not very nice, you�� You!�

�This
is my room, doof.��
Kennedy smiles.� But it�s more
than just that.� She glows.� �I�m just here on a mission.�� She pulls her bag out from under the
bed.� �I don�t have permanent digs.�

�Oh,
okay.�� Willow smiles, her rant
forgotten.� �Is it a cool mission?�

�I
think so.�� Kennedy reaches for Willow�s
hand.� �I have to find a girl.� Bring her in for training.�

�I
could help.�� Willow remarks
casually.� �I could do a spell or
something.�

�Um,
yeah.� You could.�� Kennedy tries to be tactful.� �But��

�But
obviously you have everything under control.��
Willow pedals furiously backward. ��And this is something you need to do for
yourself, and by yourself.� So I should
maybe let you do your thing and if you need my help you�ll ask for it?�

�Something
like that.��
Kennedy brushes some stray hair from Willow�s cheek.� �But I do.�
Need your help.� Just not with
this.�

�What
is it, baby?�� Willow looks
concerned.� �What�s wrong?�

�I�ve
got this ache�� Kennedy whispers the
rest into Willow�s ear.�

Willow
listens to Kennedy�s murmured and explicit invitation.� It doesn�t make her whimper, or blush.� She doesn�t stammer.� Doesn�t get weak at the knees.

Instead
she turns to her lover, a strange and sexy smile on her face.� She kisses Kennedy roughly.� Pushes her down on the bed with a strength
that catches her slayer off guard.�

�I
think I can manage that.�� Willow�s voice
comes out low.� She leers down at a prone
and wide-eyed Kennedy.� She licks her
lips.� Makes her approach.

Surprising
herself, she growls.

********************

�I
think this might qualify for Best Day Ever!��
Buffy skips in, arms brimming with bags and parcels.�

�Still
think you should let me have the Pucci dress.�� Dawn doesn�t look too upset by it.� She lays her not insignificant amount of bags
on the floor.� �It looked way better on
me.�

�Did
not!�� Buffy drops her bags.�

�Did
so!�� Dawn kicks off her shoes.� Mutters.�
�At least I filled it out.�

�Well,
I saw it first.�� Buffy invokes the First
Law of Shopping.� Case closed.

�Lucky.�� Dawn pouts.�
But then she feels better.�� I�ll
just borrow it.�

�Not
in this lifetime.�� Buffy takes off her
jacket.� Throws it on a chair.�

�How
was your day, ladies?�� Andrew steps
in.� His eyes bulge at the sight.� Such a mess.�
�Successful, I see.�

�Oh,
it was awesome.� We went to Sabatini�s
for lunch and then went into like, every store in Rome!� Dawn chatters.� �And I picked something up for you!�

�Really?�� Andrew�s taken aback.� �You got me a present?�

�You
got him a present?�� Buffy doesn�t
remember Dawn buying anything un-frilly.

�It�s
in one of these bags�� Dawn rifles
through it all.� �A-ha!�

She
pulls out a small box.� Hands it over.

Andrew
opens it.� Pulls up the tissue
paper.�

�Oh,
Dawn!�� Andrew reverently holds up his
prize.� His eyes water.� �You shouldn�t have!� It�s just��

�I
thought you�d like it.�� Dawn moves to
give him a light hug.� �And I��

�I�m
overcome!�� Andrew throws himself at her,
gripping hard and weeping.� �You�re the
nicest person I�ve ever met!�

Dawn
looks at Buffy over Andrew�s shoulder.�
Begging for help.

�What�d
she get you?�� Buffy asks.� She sucks at helping.

Andrew
manages to hold out the gift between sobs.�

Buffy
peers at the small bracelet over in her hand.�
Its thick silver chain meets a smooth solid piece at the centre.� It�s very pretty.� A little chunky for a girl.� She turns it over.� The inscription reads, �To my Obi Wan:� The Force will be with you, always.� Your Leia.

Buffy
smiles.� Looks up to see Dawn still
trying to extricate herself from a clingy Andrew.�

�Andrew.�� Buffy uses her hard voice.� �Get off my sister, please.�

Immediately,
Andrew jumps back.� Wiping his eyes and
sniffling.� Buffy hands him back his
chain.

�Can
you maybe take care of our stuff?�� Buffy
has urgent business.� �Dawn and I��

�Have
to talk.�� Dawn finishes.� �Sister stuff.�

�Ah,
I understand.�� Andrew nods, looking
wistful.� �Go on!� I�ll just be��

Buffy
tugs Dawn away.

�Here.�� Andrew picks
up a few bags.� Tries to take too
much.� Puts it all back down.� Stares at it.�
Sighs petulantly.� Grabs the
handles of three bags.� Starts walking to
the stairs, mumbling.� �A real Jedi would
just float it all up to their rooms.�

�So,
you�re buying him jewelry?�� Buffy
interrogates.� Pulling her out of
earshot.� �We�re at the jewelry stage?�

�Stage
of wha� Oh! You don�t think�� Dawn makes a very unpleasant face.� �Buffy, give me some credit!� I may be rejected and disfigured, but I do
have standards!�

�But�
jewelry!�� Buffy adds up the
evidence.� �And you with the moving
here!� And cute, geeky love notes!� And jewelry!��
She pauses for breath.� �And he
said he loves you.�

�Of
course he does.�� Dawn is
exasperated.� �I let him talk.�

�See,
that�s not helping your case.�

�Look.�� Dawn crosses her arms.� �Andrew is my friend.� Yeah, he�s a freak.� But he�s a smart, loyal, nice freak.� And under all the stupid crap he talks
about?� He�s lonely.� I get that.�
So I bought him a present, and I let him talk.�

Buffy
tilts her head. Inspects Dawn, like it�s the first time they�ve met.� Shakes her head, a low smile.

�You
really are the nicest person he�s met.��
Buffy ruffles Dawn�s hair.� It�s
just long enough to muss.

�And
isn�t that the most heartbreaking thing ever?��
Dawn makes sad face.

�Kinda�� Buffy thinks
about it.� �Yeah.�

********************

�We�re
gonna be late.��
Buffy pulls away from Faith�s groping hands.� Reaching for the new dress she�s laid out.

�Nobody�ll notice.��
Faith lunges for Buffy, grinning.�

�We�re
the guests of honour.�� Buffy gives Faith
a look.

�But
I haven�t seen you all day!�� Faith
argues.� �While you were out seeing the
sights, I was stuck here with Kennedy��

�I�d
feel bad about that if I didn�t know you.��
Buffy chides her.� �You had a
blast.� Some sparring.� Probably a stupid amount of anti-cultural
fast food after that.� Then some
chest-beating, and a nice graphic debate about which of you is better in the
sack?�

�Sorta.�� Faith gives
her that.� And a hand planted firmly on
Buffy�s behind.� �Although, it was about
you and Willow.� Performance wise.�

�Really.�� Buffy twists away.� Throws a pile of denim at Faith.� �Put your pants on, Tarzan.�

�You
won, by the way.�� Faith smirks, but
Buffy�s not looking.� �I don�t want to
wear those.�

�Then
pick something.�� Buffy pulls up the
straps of her dress.� Fiddles with
something at the collar.� �It�s just a
reception.� A couple of hours.� Meet the girls, eat some food.� No big.�

�Then
what?�� Faith roots through her
dresser.� Finds a clean-ish pair of black jeans.�
�You wanna celebrate your victory?�

�First
of all, bragging to Kennedy about my �skills� isn�t gonna
get you anything but a trip to the couch.��
Buffy has a list.� It�s short and
to the point.� �Second, if you�re not
dressed and ready to go in two minutes I�m��
I�ll��

�Leave
without me?�� Faith looks hopeful.

�I�m
thinking.�� Buffy pouts.�

�Take
your time.�� Faith leans back on the
bed.� �I got nowhere to be��

�I�ll
tell Andrew about your comic collection!�

�You
wouldn�t!�� Faith looks a little alarmed.

�And
your high score on Dance Dance Revolution.�� Buffy threatens.

�No!�� Faith leaps up, frantically wriggling into
her jeans.� �Look!� I�m getting ready!�

�And
that you watched the whole Babylon Five series with Xander last month.�� Buffy deals the final blow.

Faith
grabs the shirt she was wearing all day and pulls it hard over her head.� �Done!�
Let�s go!�

�No.�� Buffy walks calmly to Faith�s dresser.� Pulls out a cleaner, dressier, less black
shirt.� �Wear this.�

�But�� Faith protests.

�Babylon
Five, Faith.�� Buffy throws the shirt at
her.� Crosses her arms.� �Babylon.�
Five.�

Faith
looks at the shirt.� Looks at Buffy.�

Picks
up the new shirt.

********************

�In
the final battle between good and evil��
Andrew pauses.� Looks around at
his captive audience.� Returns to his
tale, his voice attempting to sound deep and dramatic.� �There will be no victory.� A small but battle-hardened group of warriors
must make the journey into the bowels of the earth.� There, they will face the unknown forces of
the enemy� and destroy them.� Or die
trying.�

Andrew
looks up from the pages in front of him.�
He hadn�t really been reading from them, he already knows the story by
heart.� He just wants to do it justice.

�Some
of you were there.� Some of you might
think I�m wrong to tell this tale.� But
without storytellers, the deeds of these few, the brave and noble sacrifices of
dear friends may be lost in the mists of time.��
Andrew looks nervously to his left.�
Willow and Kennedy nod at him.�
Dawn just sits, eyes closed.�
Andrew waits for her to give the smallest of signs.� She does; a minimal bow of her head.

�Then
we should begin at the beginning.��

Andrew
takes a breath.

********************

�The
weary few that returned did not find a paradise awaiting them.� Oh no, kind listeners.� Just the mundane responsibilities of survival
and recovery.�� Andrew stops for a moment.� A new ending comes to him like a flash,
lighting up his brain and filling him with the sorrow of it.

�There
can be no happily ever after for these soldiers of light.� For evil and its ambassadors� they are always
working to destroy our world.� And our
champions will always be called upon to fight, and sometimes to die protecting
those that can�t fight for themselves.�
Because it�s their calling.�

Andrew
looks at the rapt faces of the few new arrivals.�

�Because
they�re Slayers.�

The
silence that follows is deafening.�

Andrew
shifts uncomfortably.

�Kinda bleak.�� Faith
turns to Buffy.� Takes a step into the
room.

�Tragic.�� Buffy agrees, straightening out of her
resting place against the wall.� �I�d go
with something like ��and then they had ice cream and watched Gilmore Girls.�,
but yours was good too��

�Oh,
good evening Buffy!�� Andrew stands.� Smoothes out his jacket.� �Faith.�
I didn�t see you come in.�

�We
didn�t want to interrupt.�� Buffy smiles
at him.� �Everyone seemed so into it.�

�You
think?�� Andrew is happy with the
praise.� Like a puppy.� �Really?�

�Really.�� Buffy finds a place amongst her friends.� Hugs Dawn to her.

Faith
steps awkwardly around the bodies seated on the floor.� Pushes someone off the edge of the couch and
claims it.

�Go
ahead.�� Faith sits.

�Don�t
stop on our account.�� Buffy gives the
reins back to Andrew.�

A
girl in the front raises her hand.

�The
story�s over�� Andrew frantically tries
to think.� He gingerly sits back
down.� �I don�t know what else��

�You
gonna get that?��
Faith asks Andrew, pointing at the now waving arm.�

�Oh.�� Andrew points to the girl.� �Question from the floor?�

�You
weren�t even there, so how come you know so much about what happened?�� The girl looks around her.� �We�ve got real actual survivors here.� Why aren�t they telling the story?�

�Because�� Andrew tries to work out an answer that isn�t
lame.� �Unh� Because it�s rude to ask a
soldier about their time in battle.� And
I know what happened because I have this.�

Andrew
holds up the sheets of paper from his lap.�

�Xander
wrote it.� In pen.� You can see what he crossed out and what he added, and you can see here where he cried on the paper so
it has to be true because Xander is brave and honest and totally the sweetest
guy...�

�Andrew.�� Dawn reminds him.� �Digressing.��

�Right.�� Andrew takes a breath.� �Sorry.�

�And
he�s right.�� Buffy has her quiet voice
on.� �We were there.� Some of it��
It�s still too hard.�

�Like
when you died.�� Another girl speaks
without raising her hand.

�Not
hard for me.�� Buffy makes a joke.� �I�m used to it.� But for the others��

�It
sucked.�� Faith grabs at Buffy�s
hand.�

�There�s
something I don�t understand.�� A girl
with brownish hair speaks directly to Faith and Buffy.� �That demon bloke you shagged� that started
all this.� He made you act like Faith,
right?� So what was the��

�Brigitte!�� Kennedy growls.� �Shut.�
Up.�

Buffy
turns to look at Faith.� A look of guilt
and fear, regret and sadness.� A flash of
real pain.

�Buffy... No� I can�t.� �

�Buffy?� Please!�

Faith
shakes her head.� Brushes the look away
with her palm.� Finds Buffy�s hand again.

�The
demon.� It granted people their heart�s
desire.�� Dawn speaks up.� �Their deepest wish.� But twisted it, made it dark and wrong.�

�But
what was it?�� Brigitte is un-deterred.

�She
just wanted a piece of me.�� Faith covers
for Buffy.� Tells jokes.� �But who can blame her.� I�m smokin�.�

Willow
bores into Buffy�s skull with her eyes.�
Buffy feels it.� Turns to meet
Willow�s gaze.

Buffy
nods.�

�Actually,
I wanted Faith�s heart.�� Buffy
clarifies.� She stops for a moment,
frowning.� �In hindsight I could have
probably phrased that better.�

�Yeah.� You could have ended up with it wrapped in a
bow on your doorstep.�� Kennedy grimaces.

�In
that case,� Buffy ponders, �I definitely should have been more specific.�

********************

Faith opens her eyes with a
start.� Looking into Buffy�s eyes.� And they are Buffy�s eyes.� Still captured by the threads passing between
them, she can see.� She can see
everything.� Knowing that Buffy can see
her too.� Can see her pain, her shame,
her fear.� It�s too much.�

But Faith can�t close her
eyes.� Can�t stop feeling the
connection.� The threads of light.� Buffy�s soul threaded with her own.� It�s so pure.�
So clean.� She never knew.�

She�s deeper now.� She can see Buffy�s dreams, her fears, her heart.� Heart�s
desire.� The secret thought.� The question that lingers there.�

�Has it always been for
me?�� Buffy�s raw need is hard to
feel.� �Is it mine?�

********************

They don�t talk about it.� At least not to each other.�� They don�t need to.

There are looks.�
Long and lingering.�
Meaningful.� And there are casual
touches.� Fingers entwined.� A soft hand against a soft cheek.�

And there are smiles.� Some brief and slight.� Private.�
And some that spill out joy, painting everything around them with
reflected light.

There are nights.�
And when it�s not enough�because it�s never enough� and they want to
just be closer� just be inside each other�s skin...� they can be.

They don�t fight.�
They don�t have stupid misunderstandings and sulk for a while so that
they can make up later.� There�s no more
storming off, no more tears.

They�re not children.�

They�re Slayers.�
The Chosen Two.� They save the world.� Sometimes it takes them away from each
other.� Sometimes they fight side by
side.� They know that one day, one or the
other or both just won�t come back.� Just
won�t be strong enough or fast enough.�
Won�t be lucky enough to beat the other guy.

They don�t talk about that either.

They don�t do the relationship talk.� They don�t make promises, or waste time
agonizing and defining and worrying.�

Because there�ll be no picket fences.� No suburban dream.� No forever.��

They just take the days that are given to them.� Spend them as wisely as they can.�

They are what they are.� They have what they have.

�Is it mine?�

The answer that lies in her
own heart.� Always there for Buffy to
see.

�Till death.

********************

THE END

********************
- 34
- 35
You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.
Report Story

Heart's Desire