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Heart's Desire	By : PencilNeck Category: -Buffy the Vampire Slayer > FemmeSlash - Female/Female > Buffy/Faith Views: 9582 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 2
Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer (BtVS), nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 19
- 20
- 21
Chapter 20: The Final Countdown

The pub is usually quiet this
late.� A few locals, some farmers and
sometimes their wives, might be sipping a pint at the bar.� Jawing about the rain, or the sheep, or who�s
died recently.� It�s a small village,
after all.

But tonight, the music pumps out
loud into the streets.� Coloured lights
flash in the windows.� It�s packed and
sweaty and full of chatter.� The locals
have gone elsewhere, seeing the words �Closed for Private Party� taped to the
door.

Buffy stands outside, shifting her
heels in the light snow.� Taking a
breath, she opens the heavy door and slinks in.�
She keeps to the darker areas of the pub, ducking the stray lights from
the makeshift dance floor.� She knows she
can�t really hide.� And she doesn�t want to.� She just doesn�t want to make a big
entrance.� She�s getting tired of the
drama, and her stomach being twisted all the time.

She takes a look around.� Booth upon booth filled with girls laughing
and talking over the heavy guitars and bass.�
Some men, watchers and support staff.�
She can see Willow and
Kennedy, talking awkwardly at the bar.�
Dawn gesturing fervently to Giles and Emma.� Xander looking handsome and eye-patchy, being
dragged onto the dance floor by Renee.�
She scans past them to the pool tables.�
And she sees her.� Faith chalking
her cue, talking to a few girls on her squad.�
Immediately Faith�s eyes find her in the crowd, and she smiles.� Hands her cue to her friend, and starts
moving across the room.

Buffy makes her way silently to the
table covered in gifts and cards and boxes.�
Rummages in her purse and takes out a slim gray envelope.� She hesitates.� Not sure.�
She almost stuffs it back in her bag.�
Then, steeling herself to the mission, she clutches it to her chest.

�Whatcha got there?�� The husky voice comes at her from
behind.�

She turns, smiling in spite of her
nerves.� �I� um, totally crashed your
thing.� But�� She darts her arms out for a self-conscious
half-hug.� �Happy Birthday.�� It�s a relief that they can touch now, without
getting sucked into each other�s thoughts.�

�S�ok.�� Faith grins.�
�More the merrier!�

Buffy looks around at the
chaos.� �This your
idea?�

�Kennedy�s.�� Faith eyes the envelope in Buffy�s hand.� �Is that for me?�� She gets a greedy look.

�Yeah�� Buffy gestures nervously, the envelope
flapping around.

�Gimme!�� Faith grabs at it.� It makes Buffy laugh.� Like, really laugh.� She hides the present behind her back.

�Not yet.� I wanted to apologize first.�� Buffy giggles through it.� �I have a whole speech prepared.��

�Kennedy already�� You�re sorry.�
I get it.�� Faith pouts something
fierce, trying to snatch the prize. ��C�mon, B!�
I wanna know what you got me!��

Buffy twists away
from Faith�s grasping hands.

�You�ve got a whole pile of presents
right here!�� Buffy gestures to the gift
table.� �Mine�s�� It�s not��

�It�s crappy?�� Faith raises her eyebrow.

�I couldn�t think of anything else�
I wanted it to be something you really wanted��
Buffy cringes and gives up the envelope.

Faith starts to tear through
it.� Letting the gray covering fall to
the floor, she examines what looks to be� more paper?

�Couldn�t make it to the mall, huh
B?�� Faith grins and opens the folded
pages.� In the dark, it�s hard to see
that there�s something written there in Buffy�s careful script.

�I��
I�m sorry if it�s not�� Buffy
bites her lip.� But she�s not running
anymore.

Faith isn�t listening.� Faith�s eyes have adjusted.� And she�s finally seeing the gift that
Buffy�s given.�

�Wow.��

Faith mouths the words as she�s
reading� to help her understand.

Faith.

I
don�t know what else I can give to you.�
Stuff is just stuff.� I know!� Me saying that.� Alternate universe.� But this is the only thing you�ve ever asked me
for, so here goes.

You�re
right, I lie.� I�m a big dumb liar.� I�ve been doing it ever since� ever, I
guess.� I lie to myself and to everyone
else, especially to you.� Or about you,
or on the subject of you.� It�s all still
a little hard to put into words.� The
little balls of paper on my floor will back me up on that.� But you deserve to know.� So my gift to you, out here in the real
world:� the truth� about everything.

I�ll
start with the easy stuff.�� Yes, I
do.� And non-fat yogurt is hopeless for
taking the edge off�

�I knew it.�� She mumbles it, chuckling quietly.� Reading on, slowly taking in each word.� Re-reading parts to make sure.�

Willow says I�m selfish.� Kennedy says I�m a nutcase.� I don�t know who�s right.� All I know is that I feel�� You mess me up, Faith.� I don�t know what I think I know when you�re
around.� You push me, you argue with me,
and you grate on my last nerve sometimes.�
And when you�re not around, everything goes back to safe and easy.� And boring, and stupid and lonely.

Turning the pages, open
mouthed.��

�I know what I did.� I can remember every second of it.� I can�t take it back, no matter how much I
want to.� I can�t ever make it better.� There�s nothing...� So I won�t say sorry.� I�m not doing this so you�ll forgive me.� This is about truth.� What happened, why I left.� So I�ll just tell you�

Buffy stands there impatiently,
watching and waiting as Faith�s face contorts and shifts with every
reaction.� But it�s her
own fault.� It�s a long, long
letter.

�maybe
that�s why we�re always trying to kill each other.� Maybe it�s not really about the slayer
thing.� Maybe it�s just us.� Maybe it�s just too strong and we fight it by
fighting each other, because we know it won�t end� until WE do�� Did any of that make sense?

I
hope I didn�t forget anything.

Happy
Birthday, Faith.

�B�

Finally, Faith stops reading.� Carefully, she bends down to pick up the
scraps of the envelope.� Folds the letter
back along its creases, and tucks the white sheets back inside the gray, making
sure the pages don�t rip.� She keeps it,
trapped between clutching fingers.�
Doesn�t want to let it go just yet.

She�s quiet, absorbing and
thinking.� Lost in words.

�Faith?�� Buffy�s still standing there, her face a
weird mix of terrified and teary-eyed.

�Musta been hard for you,
huh?�� The beginning of something starts
on Faith�s face.

�The hardest.�� Buffy�s lowers her head.��

�Hey�� A light touch.� Two fingers gently raise Buffy�s head.� Forcing her eyes to see the widest, dimpliest
grin ever.

�So� You�re not mad?�� Buffy�s eyelids lower, and she�s forced to
look up at Faith from under them.�

Faith steps directly into Buffy�s
personal space, still with the idiot grin on her face.�

�No�� With her eyes sparkling like that, Faith�s
grin is less silly and more sappy.� �Definitely not mad.�

��So, good present?�� Buffy bounces on her feet, a hopeful smile
peeking out.

�Yeah.�� Faith leans in and gives Buffy a real hug. A
two-armed, wrap-around, squeeze-the-air-out-of-your-lungs,
lift-you-off-the-floor-and-shake-you-a-little-bit kind
of hug. ��Great present.�

Buffy�s feet find the floor
again.� Her arms stay wrapped around
Faith�s neck.� Her head stays gently
pressed into Faith�s neck.� She breathes
her in.� Dazed by a mix of cigarettes,
whisky, leather and soap.� It kills her
restraint, buoys her courage.� She opens
her eyes to the delicate silky skin below Faith�s ear.� And almost reaches it with her lips.� Stops for a second to exhale.��

As Buffy�s warm breath tickles the
fine hairs at her neck, Faith pulls back.�
Removing Buffy�s hands.�

�I didn�t�� It wasn�t��

�Shhh.� It�s OK.�
But this�� Faith holds up the
envelope.� �This is� a lot.� I mean��
She looks to Buffy for understanding.�
�It�s enough.��

Buffy gets it.� She stops pushing.� Biting her lip with the self-control she�s
pulling out of thin air.

There�s a moment.� Like they�re all alone, and it�s quiet.� Just them and the almost foot of air between
them.� It�s more than Buffy�s newfound
restraint can take.

�Hey!� I�m hogging the Birthday Girl!�� Buffy steps back a bit.� �You should get back to your game.�

�You�re not getting off that
easy!�� Faith grabs her hand, dragging
her away from the dark corner.� Secretly
sliding the letter down into her bra.�
It�ll be safe there, tucked tightly over her heart.

�No� Faith.�� Buffy struggles lightly.� �You should have fun with your friends.�

Faith stops.� Gives Buffy her confused look.� Then grins wide,
pushing Buffy onto the dance floor.� �I
am!�

Buffy squints as the light from the
disco ball hits her eyes.�

Xander bumps into her from behind,
then turns with a grin.� �Hey
Buffster!� Didn�t see you come in!�

Buffy shouts over the music.� �I was sneaky!�

Faith puts her arm around Buffy�s
shoulder, tossing a look over to Xander.�
�Mind your girl there, hot stuff��
Looks like she�s gettin� a better offer.�

�Oh, she�s not my girl.� We�re��
I mean she was�� But now�� Xander turns back to see Renee dancing with a
random guy in the crowd.� �Hey!� Go shake your groove thing somewhere else,
mister!�

Faith and Buffy watch Xander�s
attempt to reclaim Renee�s attention.�
Once the fun is over, their gaze is back on each other.

�So?�� Faith�s brows jump to the beat.�

�You don�t have to�� Buffy feels shy.

Faith starts swaying to the
music.� Her hips sliding back and forth
in a crazy eight.� She lifts her hands
over her head, running them through her hair on the way up.�

�Dance!�� Faith commands Buffy with a smile.� The real dimply smile from before, but with
mischief behind it.�

�I��
I should go.�� Buffy stands on the
dance floor, conspicuously still amongst the flailing bodies.� �I only��

�It�s my birthday!� There�s a rule.�� It doesn�t seem possible, but Faith manages
to look even more suggestively at Buffy. ��I get whatever I want.��

Buffy can feel it.� She�s gonna cave.� Her lips smile.� Her eyebrows rise up.� Her hips start to grind out the rhythm of the
song.� She catches Faith�s hand in the
air, pulling her closer to the spotlight.�
Stealing some of Faith�s confident happiness for herself, she purrs into
her ear.

�Let�s show �em
how it�s done.�

***********************************************

�Again!�

The girls groan, but start the
routine from the beginning.� Kick, punch,
block.� Block, throw, punch.� Kick, kick, roll.� Fifty girls in rows of ten, battling
invisible enemies under the critical eye of their leader.�

�That�s better.� Now, break off into groups of two.�� Vi paces at the
head.� �Swords.�

***********************************************

The girls are packed in tight.� Body to body, standing and sitting and leaning
wherever they can.� All crowding to get a
good view.� A new girl, pretty and
tanned, presses play on the remote.�

�Good morning, Slayers.�� Andrew pops up on the widescreen, looking
overdressed and fidgety.� He pauses,
waiting for an answer.

�Good morning, Andrew.�� A few giggling voices reply, feeling very
Charlie�s Angels.

�Greetings from beautiful
Roma.� Although I can�t be with you on
this very special mission�� Andrew sighs
dramatically.� �I�m sending a special
treat along with some of the girls.��
Andrew stands, stepping in and out of the frame.� �My Christmas present to you all� unless
Christmas isn�t your pizza margherita��
Then it�s��

He hits the microphone with
something, muffling his skillful recovery.�
The camera rocks dangerously, and tumbles over.� He�s still talking though.

�You carry the fate of us all,
little ones.� And your paths will be
rocky.� Riddled with fire and ash and
dust.�� The camera wobbles again.� Goes blurry.�
�But like the Spartans, who held off the Persian armies despite being
vastly outnumbered� I�m sure you will emerge victorious!��

�Um.� Andrew?��
A whispered voice off camera. Female, harsh and extremely
sarcastic.� �They all died��

�Thank you to my lovely assistant
Iris for pointing out that slight� possible� mix up.�� Andrew�s forehead becomes sharp and clear and
huge.� He steps back with a sigh,
revealing a white dry-erase board.� He
pulls a big marker out from somewhere.�
�But onward!� After conferring
with experts in the field, I have taken the liberty of providing each of
you�� He pauses to write down �experts
in the field�.� ��with something to
assist on your latest, most dangerous quest against evil.�

He waits expectantly.� Nothing happens.� He looks off camera.� Nods his head sideways, grimacing and
insisting with his eyes.

A woman walks reluctantly beside
him.� She�s clad in what seems to be a
rubber bodysuit, and she�s carrying a helmet.�

�A form fitting yet fashionable new
outfit, you say?�� Andrew nods his head
wisely.� �Ah, yes.� And so much more.��

Iris rolls her eyes.�

�Each of you will be equipped with
a suit, tailored to your measurements.�
My friend Massimo?� He knows
everything about fabrics and designers� and he�s got a Vespa.� He�s the coolest.�� He writes down �Massimo: cool�.� �Except that I wanted the helmets to be more
Boba Fett, and he said it�d be too bulky.�
But what�s more streamlined and efficient than an interstellar bounty
hunter?�� Still obviously sulking about
it, he writes down �Boba Fett, NOT bulky.��

�Oh for God�s sake!�� The lovely assistant is getting
restless.� �Enough with the Star
Wars!��

�Retract the claws, Catwoman!�
Andrew snaps back in his screechy voice.�
He then turns to the camera with warm, condescending eyes.� �Ah, the impulsiveness of youth.�

�I�m gonna get impulsive on your
weenie little butt in a second��

Andrew flinches, his eyes
widening.� He takes a breath.

�Okay then�� Andrew recovers.� �The suits are made of a temperature
resistant rubber, which can withstand extreme heat or cold. �They�re self sealing�� He nods to the model, clicking a button on
the remote in his hand.� The camera zooms
in on Iris� shoulder.

With a sigh, she holds a knife to
the fabric and cuts through it.�
Immediately, a black tar-like substance fills the cut.� She tugs on it for effect.

The camera zooms back quickly.� It�s jarring.�
Andrew has written �self sealing� on the board.

��and embedded with Kevlar
padding.�� Andrew nods approvingly as
Iris points to her shins and knees, chest, shoulders, elbows and back.�

�I feel like a damned flight
attendant.�� She grumbles.

�The helmet�� Andrew waits.�
She puts it on.� �The helmet is
totally cool.� It seals itself into the suit,
wrapping you up in an airtight little cocoon.�
And don�t you think that Steve Guttenberg was underrated?� He had a quiet charm�� A sort of boyish Peter Pan thing going on��

Iris struggles with the neck of the
helmet.� She pulls it off with a gasp,
and throws it forcefully at Andrew.� He
leaps back as it narrowly misses his head.

�I quit!�� She tugs at the zipper, pulling it down to
her cleavage.� �You nearly killed me for
your stupid little fashion show.�� She
storms off.� He watches her go, mouth
agape.

�Ahem.�� Andrew turns to face the camera.� �Please remember to attach the oxygen before
you seal the helmet��

The girls watching the video giggle
and point at Andrew�s red face.� He
continues to extol the virtues of his battle ensemble.

About twenty minutes later the
white board is full of random phrases; including visor, harness attachment,
bathroom, stretchy, VERY IMPORTANT, and some scribbling about Timothy
Dalton.� Andrew says his elaborate
goodbyes, and the screen goes black.

The group files out of the
entertainment room, chattering and excited to try their new gear.� Andrew may be a little strange, but the suit
is just damned cool.

A new assembly crowds in right
after them.� Taking up the space.� Filling the air with their gossip and
breathing.�

The screen flickers.

�Good morning, Slayers.�

***********************************************

Buffy rushes down the stairs,
taking them two at a time.� She�s late,
again.� But she keeps forgetting the
stupid helmet.

She reaches the landing for the
first floor.� One to go.� She barrels around the corner, and runs smack
into�

�Faith! �Hey!��
Buffy puffs.

�Late again?�� Faith moves out of her way.�

�Always.�� Buffy grins, but she doesn�t run off.� �Haven�t seen you��

�I know.�� Faith twists around Buffy, taking the top
step.� Looking down at her.� �I�ve been taking my team out.� Rappelling drills today.�

�Ugh.� I�ve got climbing.�� Buffy makes a face.� �I�m feeling much too soldiery these days.�

�Maybe not soldiery enough?�� Faith looks at her, as sternly as she
can.� �I am your C.O. remember?� And here you are slackin� right in front of
me.�

�Right!�� Buffy�s tinged a little pink.� �Sorry!��
She starts to jog down the steps.

�What?� No salute?��
Faith holds her smirk in.

Buffy flips Faith�s salute over her
shoulder.�

***********************************************

The dining hall is loud.� Loud with chatter and music.� Dawn tries to keep hold of Emma�s hand,
weaving her way to their table.�

�Dawn!� Emma!�
You�re so late!�� Willow
smiles up at them.� �It�s almost time!� Y�know?� For the yelling and the numbers!�� She giggles at something in her head.� �Like Bingo!�
Except with booze.� Oooh!� Is there Bingo with booze?� Cos that might be a little thorny, with the
coloured dabbers and all.�

�Don�t mind her.�� Kennedy kicks out a chair.� �She barely looked at the champagne and she�s
this sloppy.�

�Is there any left?�� Emma sits in the seat Kennedy�s offered
up.� �Lord knows I could stand to get a
little sloppy.�

�You look hot, by the way.�� Kennedy grins up at Dawn.� Quirks a brow at Emma, passing her the
bottle.� �Both of you.�

�Because I like you, I won�t tell
Buffy about you checking out her sister.��
Emma chugs her champagne because she�s very thirsty.� That�s the only reason.� �Where is she by the way?�

�Her team�s late getting
back.�� Kennedy shrugs.� �One of the choppers conked out.�

�That�s lame.�� Dawn stops searching the crowd, and flops
onto the seat beside Emma.� Takes the
glass she�s offered.

�Totally.�� Willow
seems to be agreeing.� She sighs, and
rests her head on Kennedy�s shoulder.

The crowd erupts.� Noisemakers and yelling and the squeaks of
those little paper horn things.� �FIVE!�

Emma turns to watch the crowd bring
in the New Year.� Smiling, relaxed
faces.� Some obviously drunken
faces.� And Faith, leaning against the
wall near the entrance, scanning the crowd too.�
Neither smiling nor relaxed.

�FOUR!�

�There�s Faith!� We should call her over.�� Emma shouts it over the din.

�THREE!�

�Where?�� Willow
pops her head up.� Sees her, and starts
waving frantically.� �Faith!�

�TWO!�

Faith doesn�t move.� Can�t see, can�t hear.�

�Well, that�s just rude.�� Willow�s
head falls back down into its comfy spot.

�ONE!�

Emma keeps her eyes on Faith.� Still hoping she�ll catch her eye.� Get her to come over.� Nobody should be alone�

�HAPPY NEW YEAR!�

She watches as Faith slowly pushes
off the wall.� Takes a few steps into the
party.� Auld Lang Syne starts playing,
and everyone sings along to the few words they know.� She gets a few friendly pecks.� A few of them a little too friendly.� She smiles, gives them a very polite brush
off and wanders away.� Emma loses her in
the crowd.

�What is this song about
anyway?�� Kennedy places a small kiss on Willow�s
temple.� Ignoring the fact that Willow�s
passed out, and drooling a little on Kennedy�s shirt.

�I don�t know.�� Dawn takes a moment to plant a chaste kiss on
Emma�s cheek.� �I could look it up.�� She doesn�t hear Emma squeak her surprise.

�Take the night off, please?�� Emma begs, recovering.� �If you go all Research-Girl, then I�ll have
to sidekick��

�Hey!�� Buffy rushes up, breathless.�

�What�d I miss?�

***********************************************

Vvvvt! Thwick!�

The bolt hits the target dead
centre.

�That�s what you�ll need to
do.�� Renee brings the crossbow down,
resting it on her thigh.� She steps behind
the line.� �Every time.� No mistakes, no almost.�

The squadron raises their weapons
as one.�

***********************************************

�What are we gonna do?�� Xander asks.�
He feels helpless.

�We are regretfully
ill-prepared.�� Giles� voice is gloomy.

�Five days.�� Dawn agrees.�
�Not enough time to pull anything off, really.�

�Maybe she�ll understand.�� Xander feels panic rising.� �And it�s not like��

�We�re not just gonna ignore
it!�� Faith shuts him down.�

�No, but perhaps something small.�� Giles ponders that.� �An intimate gathering.� Friends and family.�

�She�ll like that better
anyway.�� Willow
chimes in.� �Less chance of disaster.�

�No.� Same chance of disaster.�� Dawn deadpans.� �Less chance of casualties.�

�Fine.�� Faith takes charge.� �But it can�t be lame.�

�It won�t be.�� Willow
reassures her.� �It�ll be great.�

�Yeah!�� Xander swaggers a bit.� �You take care of the tunes; I�ll get the
munchies, and Will does the fancy streamer
magicks�� He pauses.

�She won�t know what hit her.�

***********************************************

Buffy opens her eyes.� It�s bright.�
She pushes her fists into her eyes, trying to force them to adjust.

�Hey, B�� Faith slings an arm around her shoulder.� �Ever get the feeling��

�We�ve d�j��d this vu?�� Buffy nods her agreement.

They walk to the picnic blanket,
not bothering with the food.� Just
standing, watching.� Waiting.

�So whaddya think this is all
about?�� Faith basks in the dream sun.

�The PTB want me to get the tan I
so richly deserve?�� Buffy hopes that�s
true.� She looks at her pale arms,
frowning.

The sun hides behind an ever
growing blue-black cloud.��

�Guess not.��

Faith takes a few steps away from
the picnic.� Her eyes on the
horizon.�

�Check it out.�� She points, holding her hair back with her
other hand.� The wind has picked up.

Buffy squints, crossing her arms
against the chill.� Rain starts tapping
against her skin.

The hills, far in the distance, are
dark.� Darker than they were.� The cloud that�s taking over the sky started
from there.

�I�m going to go out on a limb, and
say this is not going to end well.��
Buffy shivers as the rain seeps through her clothes, her skin.� Her hair plastered to her face and scalp.�

�Close your eyes.�� Faith whispers, shutting her own lids.

Buffy squeezes her eyes shut,
covering her ears with her hands instinctively.�
The flash lights up her skull in red.�
The crack reverberates in her ears.

She opens her eyes to shadows.� Everything in shades of grey and black.�� Faith�s outline barely visible a few feet in
front.�

Except for the hills.� The hills glow red.�

As Faith reaches for her hand,
Buffy hears it.� It crows twice.

�Did you��

�Uh-huh.�

She squeezes Faith�s hand tight,
pulling her closer.�

�Aren�t we supposed to wake up
now?�� She whispers through her
chattering teeth.

�I�m sorry.� I know you hate the cold.�� Faith wraps her arms around her.

Faith�s face is inches away from
hers.� Still not fully visible in the
sheer blanket of dark that surrounds them.

�I�m always cold.�� Buffy leans in.

�Me too.�� Faith closes the space between them.

Buffy feels a soft brush of warm
against her lips.� She opens her mouth,
pushing herself closer to that warmth.��
It feels like she�s coming apart.

�It�s time.�� A broken whisper in the dark.� A strange voice.� Foreign.

A flash of white.

�Damnit!�� Buffy wakes up swearing.� Never a good thing.

�Buffy?�� Willow�s
sleepy voice visits from the other side of the room.�

�Sorry.�� Buffy grumbles, pulling on some sweats.� �Just got a wake up call from Samosa.�

�You mean Sraosa?�� Willow
rubs her eyes.�

�Whatever, he just gave me his best
Chicken Little impression.�� Buffy finds
her sneakers.

�The sky is falling.�� Willow
looks on the floor for her slacks.� �Good
reference.�

�And also, because of the
chicken.�� Buffy looks proud.

�Are you hungry or something?�� Willow
laughs, pulling a sweater over her camisole.

Buffy checks.� Yes.�
Yes she is.

�That�s not the point.�� She nods to the door.� �Let�s go wake up Giles.�

Willow
smiles feebly.� Waking up Giles is always
entertaining.� She�s making her way to
Buffy�s side when she�s struck by something terrible.

�But Buffy!�� Willow
gasps.� �Tomorrow�s your��

�Don�t say it, Will.�� Buffy holds up her hand to stop the
words.� �Just don�t.�

Willow
talks to the air, sounding completely deflated.

�But there was gonna be cake.�

***********************************************

�It�s confirmed.�� Giles walks swiftly through the hall.� �Reports of volcanic activity in Columbia.�

�Columbia?�� Xander keeps up.� �That�s like� far?�

�South America.�� Giles mourns the state of the U.S.
education system.� �I�ve sent the
helicopters ahead, with a small team.�
They�ll set up a base camp, and be ready when we get there.�

They stop at the double doors.� Both needing their breath.� They spare each other a glance.

�Ready?�� Xander asks.

�Not hardly.�

They push through the doors,
bracing themselves for the days ahead.

***********************************************

�Alright people, you know what to
do.�� Xander finishes giving his final
orders.� �Get it done.��

He scans the crowd.� It seems strange that they can actually fit
this many people in a room.� Granted it�s
a gigantic room.� But still.� Five-hundred and� seventy-four at his last count.�

�Med teams?�� Giles waves his hands over his head.� �Follow Dawn please.� Stay with your groups!�

Xander walks purposefully across
the room, eyes locked on his goal.� Waits
to be noticed.�

�Hey.�� Renee smiles up at him.�

�Hey.�� Xander indicates that he wants to talk
privately.� They start moving toward a
moderately quiet corner.� �There�s not a
lot of time, so��

�Don�t you dare say goodbye.�

�Never.� It�s just��
Xander looks serious.�
Earnest.� �The women in my life.� They have an annoying habit of dying.� Sure, they pretend it�s some crazy heroic
trying to save the world thing.�� He�s
trying to wave it off.� Get it out there
without really saying it.� �It�s giving
me a complex.�

�Uh-huh.�� Renee knows him.� �I�m not that desperate to get away from
you.� Yet.�

�Ah.� Here I was hoping you�d be the one to break
the vicious cycle.�� Xander is
charming.� Funny and charming.

Renee only smiles.�

�So�� Basically, what I�m saying here�� Xander wraps his lanky frame around her.

�I know.�� Renee hugs him back.� It�s not goodbye.� Even though it feels like it.

�Teams Omega through Zeta!�� Giles� voice is thin.� But loud.�
�Boarding O through Z!�

�That�s me�� Renee hides in Xander�s sweater.� �I should��

�No.� None of us should.�� He pulls her back from him.� Wants to see her face.� �But we do it anyway.�

�There�s a word for people like
that.�� Renee sniffs.� Smiling despite herself.

�Moron?�� Xander tries for a better one.� �Nope.�
I got moron.�

Renee pulls her hands from his
back.� Touches his face, feeling the
traces of stubble on his chin.� She lifts
up on her toes, placing a light peck on his cheek.� Her lips hover by his ear.� She whispers.

�Hero.�� She falls back on her heels.� Gives him a last look, and then runs off to
join her squad.�

Xander blinks, caught
off-guard.� He�s feeling a little
floaty.� In a manly way of course.� But also sad, and a tiny bit turned on.

�All in all�� Xander makes his way back to the head of the
class.� �I�d say that went well.�
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Heart's Desire