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Need	By : addielogan Category: > Buffy/Spike(William) > Buffy/Spike(William) Views: 19394 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer (BtVS), nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Buffy sat on her bed, unable to stop the
sobs that wracked her body. She couldn't believe this was happening. Things had
been so good with William�they'd been perfect. Just that morning, they'd been
in each other's arms, and now�
She wished she could bring herself to be
angry at William. Everything would be so much easier if she could hate him now.
But she couldn't. She couldn't even blame him for his reaction. Of course he
didn't want to be with her anymore. He was a baron and she was a drunken slut
with a criminal record.
No, she didn't hate William. She hated
herself.
The knock on her door startled Buffy and she
looked up sharply, wiping at her eyes. "Who is it?"
"It�s Giles. I received a call from
your school today, and I'd like to talk to you about it."
Shit� Buffy thought. Just what she
needed. She'd lost William and now Giles was probably going to send her
back to her parents, who would probably stick her in a convent or something� She
got off the bed and walked towards the door, trying to calm herself so she
could ask Giles rationally to let her stay.
She didn't manage it. As soon as she saw him
her tears started fresh and she began to ramble, her words running together.
"Please�don't make me go�I'm sorry. I'll be good now, and I didn't mean
to, it's just that Cecily was so horrible, and she said and did things, and I
know that probably doesn't matter, but I'm sorry, and I don't want to go back
to my parents because they'll probably make me be a nun, and I don't want to
and�"
"Buffy, slow down," Giles said,
holding up his hand. "I didn't say I was sending you anywhere."
"You're�you're not going to kick me
out?"
"No. I merely wanted to discuss with
you what happened. Would you be willing to go sit in my study with me so we
might talk?"
Buffy nodded, still shaking slightly with
her tears. "Okay."
Giles reached into his pocket and pulled out
his handkerchief, handing it to her. "Come on. It's all right."
Buffy followed him to his study, wiping her
eyes with the handkerchief as she did. When they got into the room, Giles
pulled a chair for Buffy before sitting in one across from her. "Now as I
understand it, you got into a small altercation this afternoon with Cecily
Underwood at school. Can you tell me what happened?" Giles asked.
"Yes," Buffy said with a nod.
"See, William�"
"William from next
door?" Giles interrupted.
"Uh huh."
"And as I understand it, the two of you
have been dating, correct?"
"We were," Buffy said, her face crumpling as she said the words. "I'm
sorry�I'm just�"
"It's all right, dear child. Take your
time, please," Giles said, giving her a soft, warm smile.
"Thank you." Buffy took a deep
breath. "William used to like Cecily, but she shot him down. So then he
started dating me. And she didn't care about him at all until I got with him, and all the sudden she just has to have
him. So she hired a private investigator to dig up all the dirt from my life in
L.A. and then gave it to William, who then got all freaked out about it."
Giles's eyes widened. "Wait�she did what?"
"She hired a private investigator to
get information on me to give to William," Buffy repeated. "She had
everything�tabloid clippings, police reports�"
"Please hold on a moment, Buffy,"
Giles said, rising from his seat. He went over to his desk, flipping through a
thick address book before picking up the telephone and dialing a number.
"Yes, Mrs. Underwood, please." Giles glanced briefly over at Buffy as
he waited on the phone, then turned away as he began
to speak again.
"Yes, Mrs. Underwood, this is Rupert
Giles, the guardian of Miss Buffy Summers. Yes, I am aware of that. No, you listen here, Mrs. Underwood�your
daughter hired an investigator to retrieve private information regarding Miss
Summers that she then distributed to a third party�without either the knowledge
or consent of Miss Summers�with the sole purpose of causing Miss Summers
emotional and personal distress. I highly suggest you speak with your daughter
immediately to curb any of this sort of behavior in
the future, or you will be hearing from my lawyers. I have half a mind to take
you and your daughter into court over what she's done already." Giles
paused for a moment, listening, a small smile tugging at the corner of his
mouth. "I do appreciate it, Mrs. Underwood. I trust there will be no more
trouble of this nature. Yes, of course. Good day."
Giles hung up the phone and turned back to
Buffy. "You were saying?"
Even feeling as badly as she did, Buffy
couldn't help smiling a little. "Thank you for that."
"It was my pleasure. I've never cared
one bit for the Underwoods. Ghastly people, the lot
of them," Giles replied, sitting back down. "Now, what happened with
William?"
Buffy looked down at her hands, twisting the
handkerchief. "I think we broke up."
"You think?"
Buffy sighed. "I don't know. It was
just all so sudden. We were fine and then Cecily stepped in, and screwed it all
up."
"I'm terribly sorry, Buffy. I know this
sort of thing can be quite difficult."
"It hurts so much. I know we hadn't
been together very long, but I really, really liked him," Buffy said,
finding herself unable to keep from pouring her heart out. "He wasn't like
other guys I've dated. He was actually�nice to me. He respected me, but now I
guess that's shot all to hell." She sniffled.
Giles cleared his throat. "Well, I
can't say I know much about teenage girls, never having been one myself, but I
do believe that this sort of thing requires some type of ice cream with a
ridiculous amount of chocolate in it. I have some in the freezer if you'd like
to continue this discussion accompanied by it."
Buffy looked up. "I'd like that."
"Good." They both stood and Giles
looked at her for a moment before reaching out, placing his hand on her
shoulder. "Your parents needn't know about your suspension, Buffy. It can
stay between us. And as for going back to live with them�my home is always open
to you. Even when the school year has ended."
Buffy's eyes widened. "You�you actually
mean that?"
"Yes. As I'm sure you
have noticed, I never married. I am�seeing someone, but she has already
done all the child rearing she wishes to do, and has
no intention of remarrying in the near future�not that it's particularly something
I want myself. But I have longed to have someone in my life that I can look on
in a paternal sort of way, and as I see it, you are in as much need of a parent
as I am of a daughter. I believe some sort of arrangement can be made."
Buffy felt her tears starting again,
although this time for an entirely different reason. She tried to speak, but
found herself unsure of what to say. Instead, she threw her arms around Giles, embracing
him tightly. He hesitated for a moment, unused to such a gesture, before hugging
her back. "Thank you," Buffy whispered against him. "Thank you
so much."
"It is my pleasure to look upon you as
family, my dear." Buffy pulled away and Giles smiled softly at her,
brushing her tears from her cheeks. "Now, how about that
ice cream, hmm?"

***
*** ***
William sat alone in his room, the lights
off. He couldn't quite wrap his head around what had happened only a few hours
earlier. Had he honestly just broken up with Buffy?
Being without her was the last thing he
wanted. All he had wanted was a little time to process seeing those pictures
before they talked. Seeing her with other men had hit him hard, bringing out
the jealous boyfriend in him, and he hadn't wanted to take that out on Buffy. He
hadn't wanted to fight with her.
And hadn't that just blown up in his face? He
felt like an idiot, cursing himself for his complete lack of relationship
knowledge. He didn't know how to handle these things, didn't know what he was
supposed to say or do. Then Buffy had taken everything the wrong way, thinking
he judged her for things she'd done before they'd gotten together. He didn't.
He couldn't. He loved her too much to
look at her that way. It had been a shock, but she was still the same person
she'd been that morning, and he loved her just as much as ever.
Buffy, on the other hand, obviously believed
he did judge her. She'd accused him of thinking of her as his whore and of
wanting to break up with her because of his title. How could she think he'd do
those things? Hadn't he shown her that she meant the world to him? He'd tried.
But he wasn't very good at these sorts of things at all�
He'd thought that Buffy had enjoyed all the
time they'd spent together in bed, but what if she hadn't? What if she felt
like he was pushing for it too much, that it was all he wanted out of her? Was
that what had driven her to accuse him of thinking of her as a whore? If that were the case� William grew pale, feeling suddenly
ill. Had he made Buffy feel that way? He knew he shouldn't have given into his
body's desires the way he had. He hadn't shown Buffy enough respect. That had
to be why she felt this way about him.
And what could he say to her now? Would she
believe that he was willing to treat her the way a gentleman should? Of course
she wouldn't. She was probably glad to be rid of him, grateful to no longer have
to serve his every base desire. She'd wanted someone who didn't treat her the way those men in the pictures had, and William had
shown himself to be no better than them. He had
treated her as a whore, not as the love she was.
He wanted to find some way to apologize, but
knew there was none. He'd been so incredibly foolish and ruined the best thing
that had ever happened to him. He ached all over, his chest clenching, but he
didn't try to push away the pain. He deserved it after the way he'd treated
Buffy.
William looked over towards her bedroom,
seeing it dark with the blinds closed. He wondered where she was, and if she
was hurting, too. He knew she probably was, thinking of the horrible way he'd
behaved towards her, and he hated himself. Buffy didn't deserve what he'd done
to her. She had so much pain in her life already with her parents, and the last
thing she needed was him adding to it.
He turned his gaze back to the ceiling,
sighing heavily. "You're a stupid git, Will," he said aloud. "A stupid, pathetic git."
All he could do was hope Buffy would someday
move past what he'd done to her and find someone who wasn't too much of an
idiot to treat her right.

***
*** ***
Buffy woke the next morning feeling off. Her
body ached and something just felt wrong.
And then it hit her in a rush.
She'd broken up with William�
A minute into her day and she was already
sobbing. She was grateful for her suspension. There was no way she could face
Cecily today.
"Buffy? Are you awake?" she heard
Giles call through her door, tapping lightly.
Buffy sniffled, wiping at her eyes. "Yeah."
"May I come in?"
"Sure," Buffy said, sitting up in
bed.
Giles opened the door, giving her a
sympathetic look. "I thought I heard you crying."
"I just started," Buffy said.
"Granted, I've only been awake for like two minutes�"
"Which do you think would help you
more, Buffy? Staying in and keeping to yourself or going out and trying to keep
your mind off of it? Perhaps some shopping?"
Buffy looked at him incredulously.
"Giles, are you offering to take me shopping? 'Cause
that's a scary endeavor�"
Giles took off his glasses, polishing them
on the edge of his shirt. "Yes, well, if it would help you to feel better,
I would risk it."
"I appreciate it. I really do. But I
think this is going to be a curl up in the bed and feel sorry for myself sort
of day," Buffy replied.
"All right then. But if you change your
mind, do let me know. I'll be in the study. If you need anything at all, ring
for me and I'll be here."
Buffy gave him a tiny smile. "Thank
you. No one's ever treated me like this before. It's almost like having someone
care about me."
"I do care about you, Buffy,"
Giles replied. "I meant what I said last night. No one should have to feel
alone in this world. Be they seventeen year old girls or�very old men."
Buffy snorted. "You're not very old. I mean, you don't have to gum
all your food or anything."
Giles chuckled. "Thank you. I do
appreciate that." He reached out, squeezing Buffy's shoulder. "Do let
me know if you need anything at all. Would you like me to bring some movies up
here for you to watch?"
"Ooh, would you? I think I have The Princess Bride downstairs."
"Of course. I'll be back in a moment."
Buffy wiped at her eyes, feeling somewhat
better even though the hole in her heart that William had left still ached. But
at least she wasn't suffering in solitude. For the first time in her life she
felt like there was someone who really cared for her.

***
*** ***
I did warn about angst�repeatedly in fact.
So if you've gotten this far, you really don't have that much room to complain
because it's not like I just threw it in out of the blue� But like I said
before, I won't drag it on for a really long time.
Please review!
- 18
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