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Love and Death Embrace	By : addielogan Category: > Buffy/Spike(William) > Buffy/Spike(William) Views: 4146 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer (BtVS), nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 17
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Drusilla�

The whispered
word broke Buffy�s heart, and she wondered why she hadn�t foreseen this. Of
course he�d want Drusilla� She was his wife, his love, the reason why he�d
set out to find Angelus in the first place. And now, she was his sire � and
that was a bond Buffy understood all too well.

Everything came
crashing down on her, her exhaustion, the emotional strain, it was all too
much. She collapsed in on herself, sobbing. Broken�

She felt Spike
shifting on the bed, sitting up. �Buffy?� he asked,
his voice hoarse and confused. �Buffy? What�s happening? I� I thought I saw
Drusilla, and then� What�s happening to me, luv? Why are you crying?�

Buffy looked up
and met his eyes. She saw something there, something
she didn�t think could be there. Not after everything� �You did see
Drusilla,� Buffy said in between soft, choked sobs.
�She� She�s a vampire now, and she turned you.�

Buffy didn�t
quite know what she had expected his response to be, but she didn�t think it would
be the one he gave.

�Oh.�

Simple,
devoid of emotion. Buffy frowned,
her brow furrowing. �Oh?�

�Is there much
else I can say right now?� he asked, running his hand through his hair.

�No, I guess
not,� Buffy conceded. She sniffled, trying to gain control over herself again,
even if nothing was making sense anymore. �I�m sorry, Spike. I�I shouldn�t have
let this happen. I should�ve been faster, or smarter. I sat here while you
were�asleep�and I thought it all out in my head, how I could�ve been
better. What I should�ve done. I should�ve saved you.�

Spike moved to
her then, pulling her against his chest. �Hush now, lamb. It�s all right. It�s
not your fault.�

�But it is,
Spike. I never should�ve let this happen. You didn�t want this��

He brought her
back from him then, though he kept his hands on her arms as he looked into her
eyes. �Yes, Buffy, I did. I told you this morning, remember?�

�Actually, that
was three days ago, but�� She shook her head. �You didn�t know what you were
asking for, Spike.�

�I most certainly
did!� Spike said, the sudden raise in his voice making Buffy flinch. �I know
vampires, Buffy. In order to fight something, really fight it you�ve got
to understand it. And I saw what I fought up close, knew all the darkness, and
I wanted it. It�s been ten years since I�ve know peace, ten years since
I�ve known anything but torment. To lose that�to finally be free of the
torture of breathing� Yeah, Buffy. I wanted
it.�

�But you fought
our kind. You hated vampires��

�I had to hate
something,� Spike replied. �It was either that or hate
myself so much I�d waste away into nothing.� He swallowed hard, his eyes cast
downwards.

�But, Spike��

His eyes shot up
again, and his words came as almost a growl. �I wanted it, Buffy. I
spent so long staring into the darkness, that I wanted
to be a part of it. I needed to be a part of it. Nothing felt right
anymore, but this�this feels right.� He cupped her face in his hands, forcing
her to look at him. �I feel right with you. Like this is how things were always
supposed to be.�

She was crying,
her eyes haunted, and Spike felt a sudden rush of fear. �You still love me like
this, don�t you, Buffy? Tell me you do, please, tell me you do��

�Of course I love
you,� she assured him, though her tears fell harder. �I�ll always love you,
Spike. Always.�

�Then it�ll be
okay, kitten � because we have always now.�

Buffy collapsed
on him then, sobbing again, and Spike gathered her into his arms, holding her
close against his chest. �It�s all right, luv. It�s all going to be all right
now. You�ll see.�

She said nothing,
only cried until she was too exhausted to cry anymore. When she was asleep in
his arms, he brought them back against the mattress, holding her tightly
against him.

Together they
lay, still and unbreathing.

*** *** ***

Buffy was still
asleep, but Spike had slept long enough. For days apparently�

He brushed a soft
kiss against her brow before he rolled her off his chest, grateful when it
didn�t seem to disturb her. He was hungry, though he didn�t want to go out and
feed. Not because it felt wrong � he hadn�t carried that over with him into
death. He saw the world with new eyes now and knew he and humans were on
different links of the food chain.

No, he wasn�t
going to hunt because he wanted his first time to be with her�

He walked away
from the bed, only to turn around and smile at his sleeping lover. He knew she
was distraught over this, and he could certainly understand why, but he knew it
would be okay. He didn�t love her any less than he had before. If anything the
new understanding he�d gained of what she was made him love her more.

Nothing could
break them apart now. Spike felt strong, invincible. He and Buffy could
take on the world, live a life where they never had to answer to anyone or
anything. They�d be legends, their love epic. He could see their future spread
out in front of them, stretching endlessly. And he knew Buffy would see it that
way, too, once things were calmer and she realized how much better it was like
this.

And once they
truly had Angelus out of the way�

Spike had no
doubt he could take on the older vampire now. He�d come so close with human strength.
As a vampire, he�d be unstoppable. And with Buffy at his side�

He looked her
over again, his demon rumbling for something other than blood, though it was
tempered by the man�s desire to let her have her rest. He knew the past few
days had to be hell for her, and he�d let her sleep. He�d satisfy his desire
for blood now and wait for her to wake to sate his deeper lusts.

Spike opened the
fridge and pulled out one of the packets of blood he�d stolen from the
hospital. He knew it was probably less than fresh by now, but he needed something.
He tossed it in the microwave, warming it up before letting his fangs descend
and ripping into the packet. He moaned, the taste of the blood more delicious
than anything he�d ever known before, savoring the feel of it on his tongue.

�Spike?�

Her voice was
soft, weak, and Spike tossed the now-empty blood packet into the sink as he
walked back to the bed. �Yeah, baby?� he said as he sat beside her.

�Why weren�t you
with me?�

�I was hungry,�
he replied, brushing her hair away from her eyes. �I got some blood out of the
fridge.�

Buffy�s eyes
widened, and she scrambled to get out of the bed. �Oh god, Spike, I�m so sorry!
Of course you�re hungry. I�I should�ve taken you out as soon as you woke up.
That�s what a sire�s supposed to do, and I know I�m not really your sire, but
she�s not here, and��

�Shh� Kitten, it�s all right,� Spike told her as he leaned
in to kiss her forehead. �I�m fine. You�re upset, and you need to rest. It�s
okay. We�ll go out later, yeah?�

�I need to make
sure you�re taken care of��

�I�m fine,
sweetheart. All I need is to take care of you, okay? When�s the last time you
fed?�

�Before you�� She
stopped and swallowed hard. �Before.�

�I�m going to
heat you up some blood, and then I want you to sleep more, all right?� He
stroked her long, golden hair, a soft, smile on his face that made her forget
he�d changed at all. �You�ve been through so much, lamb. You need to rest.�

Buffy nodded,
wrapping the comforter tighter around her as she waited for Spike to come back
with blood. She sat up when he was there again, and took the mug he�d fixed for
her in her shaking hands. �Thank you.�

�Anything for
you, pigeon,� he assured her, tucking her hair behind her ear.

Buffy sipped
slowly from the mug, needing the blood even though she was too emotionally
drained to savor it. She looked at Spike, noting the change in his face,
relearning familiar features.

�Your bumpies are sexy,� she said after a long moment.

�Huh?� Spike
asked with a frown.

�Your forehead bumpies,� Buffy said, touching her own brow. �They�re sexy.
Usually, I think other vampires look kinda ugly, but you�re�� She looked down
shyly. �Yours are really hot.�

He grinned. �I�m
glad you like them, kitten. I�ve always been a fan of yours, too.�

�Yeah?�

�Oh,
yeah.� He licked his lips, a
predatory gleam in his eye, and Buffy trembled, wanting to be his prey.

She slid into
game face, letting Spike see her demon for the first time since he�d been
turned. He reached out for her mug, cupping his hand around it. �Are you done
with this?�

She nodded. �Yeah.�

�Can I shag you
now?� Spike asked bluntly.

�I was kinda
hoping you would.�

�Kinda?� Spike asked, the scar against his brow stretching.

She lay back on
the bed and crooked her finger at him, beckoning him to her. She needed to feel
him inside, to know without question that he was the same man she�d fallen in
love with. She had no doubt that as soon as he was inside of her, she�d know
for certain.

Spike set the mug
down on the floor before he was on top of her, growling against her throat as
he thrust against her, his erection hard and needy against the buttons of his
jeans.

�No foreplay
tonight,� Buffy said with a growl, her hands tangling in the blonde curls at
the nape of his neck. �I want you inside.�

Spike groaned,
lowering his head and scraping his fangs against her neck. Suddenly, he
understood exactly why she�d always been drawn to bite him during lovemaking�

They wasted no
time in getting rid of their clothes, wanting nothing between them. She raised
her legs to his hips, grabbed his cock, and pulled him inside without preamble.
Spike bucked, cried out in surprised pleasure, but Buffy sighed softly.

She knew now. She
knew�

She kept her
hands in his hair as she pulled his face to him, peppering his features with
kisses, feeling the ridges of his brow with her lips and tongue. Spike moaned, pumping in and out of her, his arms hooked under her
knees, keeping her close to him.

�Buffy, I love
you,� he panted, breathing once again, not caring if it was needed when he was
so deep inside of her. �I love you so bloody much��

�I know, Spike,�
she whispered in response. �Oh god, I know. I know��

Already they were
both close, the intensity of the moment not allowing for a drawn out coupling.
Buffy pitched her hips up, urging him on, and Spike moaned her name over and
over again, his thrusts growing in speed, proving he was something other than
human now.

Buffy was close�so
close�and she looked up at him, her body on the edge as her eyes centered
in on his neck, Drusilla�s marks still red and angry against his skin. She
growled, her demon rebelling at the fact that any
other woman would dare to taste what was hers.

Spike came the
moment her fangs were in his neck, roaring her name in animalistic pleasure as
she erased the remnants of Drusilla from his flesh. He was hers, only hers. Forever
hers�

Still coming
inside of her, Spike�s fangs closed in over Angelus�s
marks, and Buffy fell with him, stars bursting in front of her eyes. She was
complete, whole, and she knew in that moment he was right.

Things were as
they should be�

*** *** ***

Of course Spike
still loves her � we all already know what vampire Spike is like. If I made him
anyone but who he is on the show, he�d be OOC.

Reviews would be
very nice. And see, I left you with a happy end to a chapter this time! Don�t I
get points for that?
- 17
- 18
- 19
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Love and Death Embrace