Adult-FanFiction.org : Buffy

Darkening of the Light	By : addielogan Category: > Buffy/Spike(William) > Buffy/Spike(William) Views: 6344 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer (BtVS), nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 15
- 16
- 17
Standing alone at
the gates of a cemetery in Sunnydale after dark, Giles couldn't help but feel
nervous, even with the stake he gripped tightly in his sweaty palm. The whole
situation had him on edge, for the obvious reasons as well as all the other
ones he'd managed to come up with between Spike's visit to the library the
night before and now.
He knew Spike
would be less than happy to see him showing up armed, but Giles wasn't about to
take the chance it would be to come without the stake in his hand or the second
stake and the dagger he had concealed inside his coat. Not only could any
number of things attack him while he was waiting, but he still didn't trust
Spike, not by a long shot.� For all he
knew, the vampire had set this up as part of some elaborate plan that would not
end well for the Watcher.
Granted, from what
he'd seen of Spike's style prior to the fight with Buffy that had incapacitated
him for some time, the blonde vampire was not one for elaborate plans�at least
not ones that ended anyway like he had wanted. But that knowledge didn't put
Giles any at ease. Not when there were so many things to make him uneasy.
Suddenly, he
realized he wasn't alone, and Giles jumped slightly, gasping as his eyes met
Spike's cool blue gaze. The vampire grinned, flashing white teeth. "A
little jumpy there, Jeeves?"
"You do know
it's common courtesy to let someone know you're approaching before you just�pop
up."
Spike's tongue
curled behind his teeth as he rocked slightly on his heels. "Yeah, but
that wouldn't be nearly as amusing, now would it?" As quickly as it
appeared, his sense of mirth was gone, his expression growing deadly serious.
"That stake wouldn't be for her now, would it?"
Giles shook his
head. "No. I have no intention of hurting her. But you can't honestly
expect me to stand alone in a cemetery on the Hellmouth unarmed, now can
you?"
"I suppose
not," Spike relented, even as he looked at Giles slightly askance.
"Still, I'm here now, so you don't need it. Hand it over."
When Giles did as
Spike said, Spike dropped the stake to the ground, then held out his hand. "And whatever you've got in your coat, too, Watcher."
"I
don't�" Giles began, but before he could finish his sentence, Spike had
reached into the coat in question and pulled out both the stake and the dagger.
He dropped the second stake to the ground beside the first, but turned the
dagger over in his hands, inspecting it.
"Now this,
this is nice. Good handiwork on this thing." Spike slipped the dagger into
his duster. "So are we going?"
Giles almost
protested the loss of his weapons, but stopped. What difference did it make?
He'd come out here tonight, arming himself out of habit, forgetting his own existence
meant very little to him any longer. What difference did it make if something
got a taste of him that night?
None at all�
He followed Spike
through the cemetery, the nervousness that had been with him all evening
growing with every step he took. He recognized now that it was not concern for
his life that made him feel this way. It was trepidation at facing his own
failure.
Fear of seeing
what his Slayer had become.
Spike stopped in
front of a crypt and wordlessly pushed the door open. Giles stepped inside,
unable to help the shiver that passed through him as the heavy door shut behind
them.
It was obvious
looking around the crypt that more than the peaceful dead made it their home.
Candles were lit around the perimeter, bathing it in a soft glow. Among the
stone sarcophagi were a worn sofa and a television on one side, while the other
contained an older model refrigerator and a microwave. Looking closely, Giles
caught power cords running along the floor, tapping into some source he
couldn't identify,
"Come on.
She's down stairs."
At Spike's
declaration, Giles almost asked how to get
downstairs before he saw Spike kneel and pull open a trapdoor. The vampire
disappeared into it, and with a reluctant sigh, Giles followed.
This was far from the brightest thing he had done in
his life.
There were
scattered candles in the downstairs, too, yet fewer than the upper level of the
crypt, and it took the Watcher's eyes a moment to adjust. Though the floors
down there were made of dirt, a variety of expensive-looking rugs had been lain
about. Several other pieces of furniture had made their way down there as well,
including an antique armoire and a few chairs. The centerpiece of the room,
however, was a large, black canopy bed, covered in sheets of blood red silk.
On the center of
the bed, sat Buffy. She was pale, so different from the tan California girl
Giles was used to, and he knew her lack of color was due to more than her
recent change.
As soon as she
spotted Giles, Buffy's eyes grew wide, and she scrambled backwards on the bed
until she reached the headboard. There, she pulled her knees to her chin and
looked down before she began to shake her head violently, her unkempt blonde
hair waving in front of her face.
"No�he can't
be here�can't see�no�no�"
In a flash, Spike
was with her, pulling her into his arms and speaking with a tenderness that
surprised the Watcher. Spike stroked her hair as he moved to calm her.
"Shh�baby, it's okay. He's here to help you, is all. It's all right."
"He can't
see�can't see," Buffy said again, shaking in Spike's arms. "So bad
now�can't see. Disgusting�"
As he watched the
scene in front of him, Giles felt a pang in his heart. He knew that this Buffy
was not the same girl he'd known before. Soul or not, she was a vampire now,
and he knew of the things she'd done since her turning. None of them stopped
him from hurting for the girl he'd loved as a daughter.
"Buffy?"
Giles said softly as he took a tentative step towards the bed. "Buffy,
it's all right. You're not disgusting."
Buffy looked up, her
large green eyes filled with tears as her lip trembled. "I am�I am."
She turned away from Giles again, yelling as she did. "Don't look at
me!"
Giles moved closer
regardless, hesitating before he put a hand on Spike's shoulder to catch his
attention. Spike looked up, met the Watcher's eyes, and though he hesitated for
a moment, he soon got up and let the other man take his place. After all, he'd
brought him here so he could be the one to speak to Buffy.
Giles sat down on
the bed where Spike had been and ran his hand over Buffy's hair. She flinched,
but Giles didn't pull away from her. "You could never be disgusting to me,
Buffy."
Buffy looked up
and sniffled. "I am. I'm a�I'm�" She stopped, unable to say the word
in front of Giles.
For his part,
Giles was doing all he could not to cry with her, though it was impossible to
stop all the tears from slipping onto his cheeks. "I know, but it's okay.
I promise you, it's okay." How could he blame her for what she had become
when she was what she was because of him?
"Why did you
come here?" Buffy asked, her voice small, weak. Then, in almost a whisper,
she added, "I didn't want you to see�"
"I came
because Spike told me you needed me," Giles answered truthfully, keeping
his voice slow and steady. He could tell Buffy's mental state was teetering on
the edge, and he wanted nothing more than to help her from falling over into
that chasm. He had already failed her once. Perhaps he could make some level of
amends for that by helping her regain a part of herself now.
"He shouldn't
have done that," Buffy said, shaking her head in denial again. "He
should've known I didn't want you to see."
"Spike was
only worried about you, Buffy. He doesn't want you to be hurting like this, and
he thought I could help." Giles paused for a moment before he added,
"He loves you."
For the first time
since his arrival at the crypt, Buffy looked into Giles's eyes. "He�he
does?"
In all honesty,
Giles didn't understand the nature of a vampire's emotions. With all the things
he had learned about them during his training as a Watcher, that had never been
something they'd bothered to put in the texts. However, he had seen the obvious
concern Spike held for the girl, and he knew Buffy needed something now to keep
herself from slipping into full-blown insanity. Spike could be that in a way
Giles knew he himself never could. "Yes, he does."
"I didn't
think he could," Buffy replied, her voice barely above a whisper as her
eyes dropped again. "Not after�not without�I didn't think he could."
"He
does," Giles assured her softly. As much as he wished he could take her
someplace where he could keep her safe, he was an intelligent enough man to
recognize that Buffy's only real chance now was feeling like she could belong
with at least one member of her own kind. While Angel had been content to be a
loner when he'd been cursed, Giles realized that would never do for Buffy.
Despite the fact that the very nature of the Slayer was to be alone, Buffy had
always fought against that, surrounding herself with friends and loved ones.
Giles couldn't imagine her being able to survive any differently now, nor could
be imagine that she would be content to be around only humans.
She'd had a hard
enough time dealing with the ways being the Slayer had made her different from
others. To live a life in the dark when everyone around her was in the light
would be too much for her to handle.
Whether it was
truly something one could call "love," Giles didn't know, though he
would be hard pressed to come up with any other word for what he'd seen in
Spike's eyes when the vampire spoke of Buffy. Furthermore, had Spike not cared
deeply for the girl, wouldn't she be no more than a pile of dust now�or at the
very least, abandoned in this crypt, left to slip further and further into
insanity?
Instead, Spike had
stayed by Buffy's side, even going as far as to seek out Giles in order to try
to help her when he felt he wasn't getting through to her on his own. Giles
doubted Buffy was in much of a shape to be either a hunting partner or a lover
to the male vampire which, according to the Council's texts, were the only
reasons vampires traveled in pairs or groups. Spike continuing to see to
Buffy's care and well-being went against all Giles had ever been taught.
Yet, even with all
his love for his books, he knew that things you saw with your own eyes often
times carried much more credence than what was written on a page.
"I feel so
lost, Giles," Buffy said as she looked up again, the feeling she'd just
admitted to so clear in her eyes. "It hurts, and I�I don't know what to do
anymore."
Looking at her
now, Giles knew he could never truly help her. She was beyond him now, beyond
his help.
As much as Giles
didn't like it, all she had was Spike. Spike had gotten him to help Buffy, but
Giles knew that the vampire was the one who could truly give Buffy the help she
needed.
He'd have to show her to live in the darkness�
"Let Spike
show you, Buffy," Giles replied, the words hurting him to say. He didn't
want to let her go, didn't want to accept the fact he'd truly lost her. And
yet, he knew now, seeing her sitting in this crypt, that
he had.
Her skin was pale
and cold. Blood stains marred the clothes she wore. Buffy was dead. And short
of driving a stake through her heart, there was nothing he could do but let her
be what she was now.
"Is it really
okay, Giles?"
Giles smiled at
her and placed his hand on her shoulder, doing his best to convey authority.
"Yes, Buffy, it's okay. You can let Spike take care of you, and it'll be
all right." He didn't know if he was lying or not, and in all honestly, he
figured he probably was. But she needed something now, something to hold on to,
and this was all he could give her.
Tentatively, Buffy
smiled back, and Giles reached up to tuck her hair behind her ear. She started
to duck her head, to shield herself from his gaze, but Giles wouldn't let her.
"You're as beautiful as ever, Buffy."
"Thank you,
Giles," she replied, emotion choking his voice.
He stood and was
relieved when Buffy didn't try to stop him. Leaving her now was difficult
enough without her making it any harder on him. "Let Spike take care of
you, Buffy," Giles told her one more time. "He'll make things
okay."
Buffy's only
response was a small nod, and at that, Giles returned to the ladder and climbed
back to the upper part of the crypt. He heard Spike come up after him, but
didn't turn around to face him until he was almost at the door.
"I told her
you'd take care of her. Don't make a liar out of me."
"I won't,
Watcher. Thank you."
With nothing left
to say, Giles left the crypt.

*** *** ***
I know it's been a
couple weeks since I updated, but it's been fairly hectic for me lately.
However, even though I wasn't posting, I have been writing when I can, and I've
managed to finish this story�at least in rough draft form�so the rest of it
should come without any more long breaks.
For any of you
also reading Oedipus Calling, I reluctantly admitted to myself that I can only
work on one story at a time these days and put it on hold until I got this one
out of the way. Hopefully, I can start it back up in the next few weeks.
Please review.
- 15
- 16
- 17
You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.
Report Story

Darkening of the Light