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The Truth Behind His Life	By : Strailo Category: BtVS Crossovers > Misc - General Views: 13914 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own BTVS or Bleach. I make no money off of this and mean no copyright infringement.

Chapter List
- 13
- 14
- 15
Title: The Truth Behind His Life
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Batman
Part: 14
Characters: Joker, Harley, Xander
Word count: 1,189
AN: Another Chapter, another Friday. I hope that everyone had a wonderful holiday!
*~*~*~*
Stepping from his bed room, rubber chicken filled with crumbled brick held at the ready, the Joker sneered at the thought of someone daring to break into their lair. ‘The balls this guy must have,’ he thought to himself as he came around the hallway corner and into the kitchen.
“Oh sweet Goddess! I’ve seen parental dick!” The scream of horror followed by a swish of skirt made the Joker pause before blinking and taking in the turned body of his wayward child.
“Alexander?” he asked in surprise, the dark head nodding. “What the fuck are you doing here?”
“Trying to make coffee, but apparently I’m being blinded by your state of undress,” Xander whined, not turning around. “Can you please go get dressed and maybe wake Harley? I came to chat,” he continued, reaching out to pick up a can of coffee, waving it.
“Yeah, sure, kid,” Joker snicker, whistling as he headed back to the bedroom. “Harley, baby! Get dressed! The child of my loin’s came to visit!”

“Really, sugar?” Harley squealed as she jumped out of bed. Joker had to pause and enjoy the lush curves and strong muscles of his lover’s body that was usually hidden by her costume. “Come on, Joker, stop leerin’ and get dressed,” she laughed, pulling on a plain work out shirt and a pair of sweat pants, not even bothering with her blond hair. Skipping out, she squealed wordlessly and pulled a bewildered Xander into a tight hug before pulling away and looking him over with a critical eye.
“Hello. You’re Harley, right?” Xander asked in greeting, getting a beaming smile.
“That I am. And you, my dear, are much to skinny,” she stated, shoving him out of the living room where Joker was already sitting and smiling at them. “You and puddin’ talk while I make something to eat,” Harley ordered, leaving the two blinking after her.
“My coffee,” Xander pouted, Harley coming out with a tray full of sugar, creamers and two large cups of coffee. “Thank you,” he chirped, finally sitting down with his cup after adding a bit of sugar. Harley was quick to disappear into the kitchen once more, leaving them alone.
“So why did you come by and break in?” Joker drawled, gazing over the rim of his coffee cup at Xander. The young man gazed back and stirred his own drink, eyes dark, watchful. They reminded the criminal of Selena’s eyes when she was watching, waiting for the right moment to strike.
“I came to speak with you,” Xander finally said, placing the cup aside, lacing his fingers together to rest on his lap. “I’m sure that you know just who I am, beyond the fact that I’m your child with one Selena Kyle.”
“Harley does some amazing research,” Joker confirmed, nodding his head. “But a lot came from Selena herself.”
“Yeah, I heard that part,” Xander said as he crossed his legs. At the man’s look, he just smiled sweetly and said, “Having one of the Bat family on speed dial comes in handy.”
“Sneaky,” Joker chuckled, his child still smiling at him in return. “So what exactly are you here for?” he asked.
“I’m here to give you the low down before I go and tell Selena all about my life,” Xander replied, leaning his chin onto one fist.
“Gonna let me ask all my questions?” His answer was a quick nod which he returned. “So, begin my dear child, while my mind holds out for you.”
“It’ll always hold out for me,” Xander stated. “Now then, my story starts when the Harris’ adopted me from the orphanage that you two dropped me off at. From my memories, I was treated well. Or as well as those two could treat a kid working so often. I think in those first 8 years, I saw a babysitter more then I saw them and I preferred the babysitter to the coolness that I got from them.”
“Why the hell did they adopt you if all they would do with you is what they did?” Harley asked as she came in with a large tray of finger foods. Xander raised an eyebrow at the speediness of her before shaking his head, braid swaying.
“Because a child was a status symbol amongst their co-workers at the Mayors office,” Xander drawled, reaching forward and plucking a slice of melon off of the tray. “They worked at the Mayors office up until I turned 9 and then they were transferred to a lower office. That’s about the time their descent into the bottle started.”
“So they were alcoholics,” Joker stated. Xander nodded as he bit into the piece of fruit. “Did they ever hit you?”
“They tried, but the threat of all of their drinks turning into cats piss stopped them rather fast,” Xander said, eyes wide and innocent. “That was entirely accidental by the way, at least if it was me. I never quite figured out how that happened.”
“Sounds like you were well protected in that town,” Joker mused, the younger male nodding. “So what happened during your sophomore year?”
“Buffy came to town and brought with her all sorts of problems,” Xander stated. “She set off a damn prophecy, setting the Master loose. She then fucked me and several people over by fucking a cursed vampire, which set a psychotic master vampire demon loose. And then she didn’t go after him, leaving him loose and able to kill a few people. Of course, this was all during the time that we were supposed to be planning for the Mayors attack, not that I knew a whole lot since she decided that I should be on the fray,” he finished.
“Why is that important? And remember, I have very little information to work from,” Joker said.
“I was possessed by the oba of a hyena pack and a solider during Halloween due to a chaos sorcerer,” Xander stated.
“Please don’t tell me you’re the only one with any tactician knowledge,” Joker groaned before letting loose a howl of pain at the smirk on Xander’s lips.
“What’s up pudding’?” Harley asked, coming out with a spoon in one hand and a pot in another.
“He just found out how idiotic some of my friends could be,” Xander said, eyeing the pot. “Cassarole?”
“Yep. Chicken with some nice cheddar,” Harley replied, smiling brightly. “You can take the leftovers home with ya when ya leave.”
“Thank you, Harley,” Xander said as she once more disappeared into the kitchen with a bounce. “I also lost my best friend and crush at the time, Jesse, to the stake bait bitch, Darla.”
“Is she dead?” Joker asked, perking up, eyes bright as he rubbed his hands together. Xander just eyed him and popped a piece of cheese into his mouth.
“Yep. And you want to know what’s ironic?” he asked, waving another piece of fruit at his father.
“What?” Joker asked, smirking at the mischievous look on his child’s face.
“She created the one who staked her and he’s now a good friend,” he snickered, sending Joker into peals of laughter.
- 13
- 14
- 15
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The Truth Behind His Life