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Gardens of Oblivion	By : addielogan Category: > Buffy/Spike(William) > Buffy/Spike(William) Views: 12475 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer (BtVS), nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 11
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Buffy sat on her
couch, feeling numb. What had just happened with Spike didn�t seem like it
could even be real; it couldn�t be more than a nightmare.

She still
couldn�t seem to wrap her head around the idea of vampires being real, never
mind anything else. It had seemed beyond farfetched when Anya had brought the
subject up, but now�

She certainly couldn�t
pretend she hadn�t seen Spike�s face change.

So if vampires were
real and she�d spent the past week in bed with one, what did that mean for her?
Was she infected or something now? If she was, was there some sort of treatment?
Should she be taking garlic pills?

To make matters
even more confusing, she still wanted Spike. He�d revealed himself to be a
literal monster and tossed her from his home a second time, and yet her body
was throbbing with need for his touch and his touch alone. What did it mean
that she as desperate for someone who wasn�t even human? Was she sick?

Or maybe it
wasn�t her at all, Buffy realized, her eyes widening as a new thought entered
her mind. Didn�t vampires have like a thrall? Dracula was always putting women
into a trance in the movies. Had Spike done that to her?
It would explain a lot of things � like why she was suddenly hornier than she
had ever been in her life. Spike could have used his vampiric
powers to turn her into some sort of desperate sex kitten.

Which, Buffy had
to admit sounded a bit farfetched, but a week ago she would�ve said the same
thing regarding the idea of sleeping with a vampire at all.

Truth be told,
she had no idea what was going on or how to handle it � and being in the dark
like this wasn�t something Buffy enjoyed.

So she decided to
be proactive, stop moping and find answers instead.

She glanced down
at her dress and amended that.

She�d find
answers as soon as she cleaned herself up.

*** *** ***

Buffy sat on her
living room floor, surveying the piles in front of her. It may have garnered
her a few strange looks from the librarians, but she�d checked out every book
on vampires she could get her hands on, desperate to find something helpful.

So far, she�d
come up empty.

Her subsequent
trip to Blockbuster hadn�t proven anymore fruitful. Every movie she�d put in
seemed to have its own take on what vampires were. And everything seemed to
contradict in at least some way with what she knew about Spike.

A stake to the
heart killed them, secured them to their graves, or did nothing at all. Crosses
burned, repelled, or made them mock you. Sunlight was instant death,
unpleasant, or part of a myth. They had reflections and showed up in
photographs � or they didn�t.

They could only drink
blood. Or other food was okay, too, just not enough.

They were evil.
They were misunderstood.

The list went on
and on, with everything debated from sleeping arrangements to physiology.

The only thing
anyone could seem to agree on was that they drank blood.

Unless
it was a psychic vampire. Then
apparently they fed off human energy.

Buffy growled in
frustration and knocked a pile of books over. With all the dating manuals out
there, couldn�t someone have written a guide for what to do when you
find out the hot guy you pick up at a club is really a hot dead guy with
a blood habit? He�s Just into your Jugular, perhaps?

She turned
sharply towards the door when she heard someone knock. Tentatively, she got up
and went to it, her breath catching when she looked out the peephole and saw it
was Spike.

�Buffy, I just
want to talk,� Spike said from outside. �I promise I won�t lay a finger on
you.�

Buffy chewed her
bottom lip as she debated whether or not to open the door. She knew promises
aside, he could still hurt her. Only if he wanted to, wouldn�t he have
killed her that morning?

Unless he�d
decided since then that now she knew his secret, she must die.

�Look, even if
you open the door, I can�t get to you. I�m forbidden from entering a home
without an invitation.�

Buffy frowned.
She�d read that somewhere, hadn�t she? Although he still could be lying�

She decided to
take the change. If nothing else, she�d risk it in order to get answers to her
questions.

However, to be on
the safe side, she grabbed something else she�d picked up earlier.

Spike�s eyes
widened when Buffy opened the door and he saw what she was holding. �Is that a
wooden stake?�

�Yeah. Do they work?�

Spike swallowed.
�Yes.�

Buffy held his
gaze. �Good to know.�

�It�s not really
necessary right now,� Spike said. He held up his hand, demonstrating the
invisible border that stood between him and her house. �See?�

Buffy lowered the
stake, though she didn�t let it go. �How did you find me anyway? Some sort of
vampire hunting powers?�

�You�re listed in
the phonebook.�

�Oh. Right.�

Spike took a deep
breath, and Buffy wondered why. Did he actually breathe like humans did? Her
research had been inconclusive on that matter as well.

�Look, I came
here because I couldn�t leave things like they were this morning. I�m sorry for
that. I just� I don�t know what to do about this whole thing. I wasn�t looking
for a relationship � I certainly wasn�t looking for one with a human � but then
here you are, throwing a spanner in the works and making things all sorts of
wonky.�

Buffy crossed her
arms over her chest, the stake still gripped in her hand. �Gee, just what every
girl longs to hear. That she�s a spanner in some guy�s works.�

Spike gave her an
exasperated expression. �That wasn�t my point.�

�Then get
pointy.�

�I wasn�t looking
for anything, but I found it. I�ve been on this earth for over a
century, Buffy. Been dead for most of it, and I�ve felt it, too. Losing
Drusilla, ending up on my own � hasn�t really made immortality much of a party.
But then I met you, and it�s like getting to see the sun again. You make me
feel things, want things, that I�d given up on.
It bloody terrifies me.�

�You�re
terrified. I just found out I�ve been sleeping with a vampire.�

�Yeah, well��
Spike stopped and took another one of those deep breaths, trying to collect his
thoughts. �Look, this is crazy, yeah? Even if I wasn�t a vampire, this whole
thing would be insane. I�ve known you for a week, Buffy. A week.
And already I�m so sodding crazy about you I don�t
even know what end is up anymore. You�re all I bloody think about. And I know I
should just get out of your life. Hell, you�re probably two seconds away from
slamming the door in my face. But I can�t just walk away from this. You�ve
crawled under my skin, gotten into my blood. I�m lost, Buffy. I�m lost.�

Buffy stared at
him, her throat growing tight. That was probably the most romantic thing any
man had ever said to her, especially if she factored in the sincerity she�d
seen in his eyes and heard in his voice. But did it even matter? The fact still
remained that he was a vampire and she was, well, not.

�I can�t, Spike.
I�m sorry. I�I can�t handle this.�

Spike reached for
her, though his hand dropped abruptly as he remembered the barrier. �Buffy, please. We�ll work something out, figure a way to
deal with this, Just give it a chance. Please.�

She shook her
head, not willing to cry.

�No.�

For a moment,
Spike stood watching her, looking helpless, an invisible yet tangible reminder
that they were from two different worlds between them. Buffy couldn�t take
looking at him, couldn�t stand watching her own heartbreak mirrored on his
face. She shut the door, holding off her tears just long enough to get it
between them.

She leaned
against the door, unable to stop herself from crying any longer. Spike was
right � this whole thing was completely insane. But knowing that, knowing everything
didn�t change the wanting, didn�t do away with the raw need to be in his arms.

Buffy realized
then that she didn�t know what scared her more � the idea of falling for a
literal monster or the idea of falling at all.

What would happen
if she let Spike go now? He was all she had. She had no family, no real
friends. For years, her life had become so entwined with Riley�s that it had
been like she hadn�t had a life at all. Now she felt like she was waking up
again, coming back to life, and Spike was a very, very
big part of that. Could she give that up? Could she give up the way Spike made
her feel?

The stake
clattered to the ground as she ran out of the house, chasing Spike into the
yard. He turned just in time for her to launch herself into his arms and kiss
him hard.

When she pulled
away, Spike was looking at her in shock. �Buffy, what��

�I changed my
mind.�

�Seriously? You�re not just fucking with mine?�

She gave him a
small smile. �No.�

Spike�s answering
grin was broad. He scooped her up in the air and kissed her again. Buffy gave
in to the feel of kissing him, pushing everything out of her mind other than
how Spike made her feel. Nothing else needed to matter, not when he was
touching her.

He broke away
from her lips to carry her up to the door, and Buffy clung to him, welcoming
the comforting, solid feel of him against her.

Spike paused at
the door, and Buffy looked up at him, her brow wrinkled. �Why are you
stopping?�

�You have to
invite me in, luv.�

�Oh, right.�
Buffy swallowed, reminded again that the man holding her was something other
than human. Common sense told her that inviting vampires into your home was a
very bad thing to do. It had been the precursor to gruesome deaths in the
movies she�d half-watched earlier. But this was Spike, and despite his
insistence earlier that he could lose control, he really hadn�t.

Besides, the bed
was inside.

�Come in, Spike,�
she said hoping that was enough, that there weren�t some special
vampire-inviting magic words she didn�t know.

Apparently, it
was enough, because as soon as she spoke, Spike carried her into the house,
kicking the door shut behind him.

�Bedroom�s the
second one on the left.�

Spike carried her
into the room and dropped her on the bed, shucking his long, leather coat
before he was on her, kissing her. She writhed beneath him, moaning into his
mouth.

A stray thought
popped into her head, and Buffy smirked against Spike�s lips. He felt it and
pulled back to look at her. �What?�

�I was just
thinking it would be nice to actually have good sex in this bed for
once.�

Spike smirked at
that as well. �Getting a kick out of me fucking you in the bed you shared with
your husband, are you?�

�Little bit,
yeah.�

�Vindictive
bitch,� Spike said in a teasing tone as he kissed the tip of her nose. She
giggled and the sound made Spike smile. �I missed you today. So bloody much.�

�Did you?�

�Yeah. I regretted it all as soon as you left, but it was nine o�clock in the morning. I couldn�t go after you for hours. Drove me up the sodding wall.�

�So daylight and
vampires really aren�t big with the mixing?�

�No. Direct
sunlight makes me burst into flames.�

�Ouch.�

�Oh
yeah.�

�Well, we can work
around that,� Buffy said, her hand against his cheek.

�I�m glad you
want to.�

�I�m glad you do,
too.�

�Doesn�t
feel like I have much of a choice.�
Spike shook his head. �I don�t know how you managed to do this to me, luv, but I feel like I need you more than I need blood. My
body craves you constantly.�

�I don�t want to
try to figure out why anymore,� Buffy told him. �I don�t want to think at all.
I just want to feel.�

Spike pressed his
denim-covered cock against the apex of Buffy�s thighs. �I can make you feel,
baby. I can make you feel all sorts of things.�

Buffy reached
between them, her fingers tugging at his belt. She growled in frustration when
she fumbled. Spike chuckled, amused. �Want something,
kitten?�

Her hand slid down
and gripped the bulge in his jeans. �That. I want that.�

�How
convenient. He wants you, too.�

Buffy smiled at
him, feeling her nervousness lessen. Spike was acting like himself again, or at
least how he had acted before he�d freaked out on her. She liked this, liked
how comfortable it made her feel around him when he was being playful and sexy
at the same time. Things were normal again, like that other
thing hadn�t happened at all.

�So can I have
him then?�

�You know, you
have absolutely no patience at all.�

Buffy pouted.
�But I�m all empty��

Spike shivered,
her words and that irresistible little pout of hers making him rock hard. �And
you want me to fill you up?� he asked, his voice dropping and covering her with
goosebumps.

�Only you can.�

Spike�s eyes grew
darker with lust, a low growl rumbling through him before he pulled her face to
his and kissed her. They both lost the need to speak, communicating with their
bodies instead, rolling on the bed with hands pulling desperately at clothing,
a unifying desire between them to remove the barrier.

They ended up
with Spike on his back and Buffy straddling his hips. She sank down on his
cock, crying out in relief when she was indeed full again. He rested his hands
on her hips, letting her set the pace, have control � something she couldn�t
remember having happened in that particular bed before.

She felt better
now, and not just from the sex itself. She felt as if she was exorcising what
remained of Riley while moving on to something new with Spike. For the first
time in years, she had a real future, something to look forward to. She was
starting over, heading into something that was fresh, without the monotony her
life with her husband had been.

Buffy looked down
at Spike, finding it had to believe he was, in fact, dead. He seemed more alive
than anyone else she knew, his eyes so bright and vibrant. The words came
before she fully thought about them. �You feel alive to me.�

He blinked, then smiled softly. �With you, I am.�

*** *** ***

Thanks to all of
you for the huge response I got for the last chapter. It was so nice to see so
many people are really getting into this story. It makes me want to write it
even more�
- 11
- 12
- 13
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Gardens of Oblivion