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What a Mother Wouldn't Do	By : QueenB Category: -Buffy the Vampire Slayer > Het - Male/Female > Buffy/Giles Views: 5213 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer (BtVS), nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 10
- 11
Of course there were explanations to be made. As soon as Buffy got her strength back, she asked what Giles had done.
“Buffy, please. You’ve just been through a traumatic experience--”
“Yeah, that was a week ago. This Slayer is all over that. Got kidnapped, got baby, got rested. Super Slayer healing, remember? I want to know what you did, Rupert. Now.” Buffy crossed her arms and stared him down.
“Buffy, you have to understand. Given the urgency of the situation, the fact that we all had to leave in such a hurry…”
“Stalling not impressing this Slayer. Less blah blah. More info.”
“I burnt the Green Lady and her child. Torched them, to be exact, until nothing was left but ashes. Then I flushed the residue down the toilet.”
Buffy blanched. “No. Y-you didn’t.”
“Dearest--”
“Don’t ‘dearest’ me! Giles, that was, that was… how could you DO something like that!? To an innocent baby?”
“Buffy, it was a demon.”
“A helpless child!”
“Who would have grown up, if it was possible, to be exactly like its mother.”
“We don’t know that! Giles, you promised me--”
“I made no promises about the child’s wellbeing. I only asked you to trust me, trust me to do the right thing.”
“You mean what you thought was right under the circumstances. Without consulting me, I might point out.” Buffy threw up her hands in exasperated rage. “God, why do the men in my life always do this?! I would have thought being your wife counted for something!”
“It must certainly does. That’s why I had to do this.”
“Giles, it was a child, don’t you get that? A child just like our Theora.”
His gaze hardened. “No, Buffy. It was in no way like Theora. Do you think Theora will grow up to drain the life out of human babies to sustain her own existence?”
“This is the Hellmouth. You never know what could happen. She could become a vampire. What then? Would you kill her the way you would have with Angelus?”
“If I had to.”
Buffy backed away from him. “God, I can’t believe you’d be so cold. Then again, why should I be surprised? You wanted me to kill Dawn,” she spat.
“I would do it to save innocents, to save the world if need be--as you ultimately did when you sent Angelus to hell.”
“No, Giles. I sent Angel to hell. Angelus got trapped back in his little box and Angel went to hell along with him for the ride. And that was so wrong. Angel didn’t commit any of Angelus’s crimes. It was so beyond unfair what I did to him. I didn’t even get to explain why I had to…” Her voice choked off. Then she continued quietly. “I can’t imagine what that did to him.”
“But I know exactly what that did to you. You disappeared and I thought you were dead. Then you came back. You never spoke of your grief, of how devastated you must have been to do that to somebody you loved. But I could see it in your eyes when the careful façade you cultivated in front of the others would slip. I knew when Angel came back and I realized you’d hidden his reappearance for days, possibly months, without telling anyone--”
“Giles, about that…”
He held up a hand. “I’m not condemning you. If you had come back under such circumstances after I’d--dispatched you for the sake of the world, I might have committed the same actions. Actually, that’s exactly what I did do since I didn’t tell of your second death to the Watchers Council. I judge your feelings by what I know of you. By my own, if that doesn’t sound too arrogant.
“So, yes, I would kill our child if she were to suffer such a cruel fate. Because I know what it would do to you if you were called upon to do it.”
There was an extended silence while Buffy bent her head. Giles stared at her anxiously, willing her to understand. “Giles, I can’t think this was the right thing to do.”
“I know. But it was necessary. Believe me.”
“I do. I just wish we could have found another way.”
“As do I.” It didn’t escape his notice that she had said “we.” Right or wrong she didn’t divorce herself from his decision. Whether it was a good thing or bad that she chose to share equal culpability in his decision was something he didn’t want to consider for this moment. What was important was that she accepted that he’d done it out of necessity and not willful spite.
She walked away to rest on their couch. Theora lay in a crib not too far from her mother. After the Green Lady had tried to take her child, Buffy had been fanatical about keeping the little babe close to her. Now she reached out and rocked her almost absently.
“You know, Green Gal said the Hellmouth is no place for bringing up kids.”
Giles grimaced and came to rest beside her on the couch. “She may have had a point. But she was an evil creature. Her words aren’t to be considered as gospel.”
“I’m not so sure. I mean, where else would parents be having this kind of discussion about their kid’s future? In other homes, mom and dad are probably arguing and worrying about what pre-school to send the young ‘uns to and here we are, talking about whether we’d slice and dice our own offspring if she grew up to have fangs and ridges.”
“Only on the Hellmouth,” Giles added in his dry tones.
“Yeah. Only on the Hellmouth.”
There was another silence and Giles peered at her face, attempting to gauge her thoughts. During the past week, she had clung to Theora in a way that wasn’t altogether healthy. But at least she seemed to be recuperating. He thought about what Dawn had told him about Buffy’s state of mind and how this must be affecting her behavior. “Buffy, I know you’ve been having doubts.”
Startled green eyes met his. “Doubts? About us? No doubts. No doubting Buffy here. Who said anything about me being a doubter?”
“No, not us. I mean, about our new life, the one we’re trying to forge here on the Hellmouth. You were thinking about leaving this place but you weren’t certain if I wished to do so.”
“Oh yeah. About that. I was thinking--”
“You’re right. We should leave this place.”
“We need to stay.”
They stared at each other. “Buffy, I thought you wanted to leave? This place is dangerous and Dawn told me of your fears.”
“Dawn told you? That brat. I told her to keep her mouth shut,” Buffy scowled.
“We were worried about your safety after your kidnapping and Dawn let it slip that you were uneasy about our future.” Now it was his turn to frown. “So why do you wish to stay? Surely after everything’s that’s happened in the last few months, you must be more anxious than ever to abandon such a perilous place.”
“You’re right, Watcher mine. Given my choice, not wanting to bring up kids on Hell Central. But, while I was strapped down, listening to the Green Lady talk about kicking off the dust that was Sunnydale, I remembered everything you told me about sacred duty.”
“There’s more to life than being a Slayer, Buffy--”
She squeezed his hand. “I know that, Giles. I’ve fought tooth and nail to scratch out a semi-normal existence, to have more than just slaying and duty. You’ve certainly given me much more, more than I ever thought I could get.”
Her face softened a little. But then resolution slid into those green eyes. “But I also thought about Margie and Arnold, about all the parents living here on the Hellmouth. I thought about that Class Protector prize I got in Sunnydale High. If anybody here grows up to a ripe old age, it’s because I do my job, the one that’s more important than flipping burgers or even teaching other women martial arts. I slay. And their children get to live.”
Giles wrapped his arm around Buffy and she leaned her head against his shoulder. “Darling Buffy. Are you entirely sure? Ms. Icqueen wanted to leave the Hellmouth and she was a demon. If she considered this place too high-risk to raise a demonic child, then it must be even more so for a human baby.”
She snorted. “Exactly. Ms. Ick was a demon. She had no sense of responsibility for anything or anybody but her own kid. That’s what all mothers are like. But I’m so much more than that. I have to think about other people’s children, too, not just my own.”
Giles gathered her close. This Buffy was so much more than the girl who’d rejected him her first day in Sunnydale High, the adolescent concerned with nothing more than whether she’d have unfashionable hair. “Sweet girl,” he murmured into her hair. “I’m so proud of you.”
One of her arms snaked around his waist. “Thanks, Jellybelly. That means a lot coming from you.” Buffy tilted her head up to peer in his face. “And how about you? You will stay with me? I-if you have to leave, you’d tell me, right? You wouldn’t just disappear and take off without me?”
“Are you still worried about that?”
She sighed. “Yes. No. Well, I think about the others, Willow, Xander, Anya, Dawn. They’re making new lives for themselves and they can’t be expected to hang around this tiny joint forever. I-I’m just hoping that you’ll stick around. Even if they don’t.”
“No, I shall never leave you. You’re stuck with me, Buffy. Me and my mushy peas.”
She snorted and then burst into a giggle. “And your old Bay City Roller albums.”
“And my singing in the bathtub.”
“And you’re stuck with me and Mr. Gordo.”
“We’re stuck with Mr. Gordo.” He looked down into the crib. After having been carefully washed, the pink stuffed pig had been passed down to Theora and now occupied a place of honor in her crib. Theora had become attached to it at once, clutching the pig with a baby’s tenacious grip even when she was asleep.
As if on cue, Theora let out a grumbling whine and began fussing in her crib. “Uh oh. I know what that sound means.” Buffy bent and lifted the precious bundle out and unfastened her blouse. Theora latched with greedy lips onto her nipple and began sucking, gazing up at her mother with sparkling eyes. Giles and Buffy had argued whether the green in them came from her or him but decided, in the end, that it didn’t matter.
She glanced down at the baby. “I think she’s full now, Giles. Wanna burp her?”
“Gladly.”
That adorable Buffy wrinkle creased her nose. “Liar. I’ll carry up the crib and you can hold her.” She trudged up ahead of him on the stairs and he watched her butt twitching in appreciation. The doctor said they had to wait six weeks after the birth before normal sexual relations could be resumed. But then again he wasn’t married to a normal woman…
__________
Theora was full but it would take more than that to send her to sleep. Fortunately, Giles had learned the quickest way to lull his newborn. Doing this as much for his wife as his child, Giles bent his head and began singing.

“Goodnight my angel time to close your eyes
And save these questions for another day
I think I know what you’ve been asking me
I think you know what I’ve been trying to say
I promised I would never leave you
And you should always know
Wherever you may go
No matter where you are
I will never be far away.
Goodnight my angel now it’s time to sleep
And still so many things I want to say
Remember all the songs you sang for me
When we went sailing on an emerald bay
And like a boat out on the ocean
I’m rocking you to sleep
The water’s dark and deep
Inside this ancient heart;
You’ll always be a part of me.
Goodnight my angel now it’s time to dream
And dream how wonderful your life will be
Someday your child may cry
And if you sing this lullabye
Then in your heart
There will always be a part of me
Someday we’ll all be gone
But lullabyes go on and on;
They never die…
That’s how you and I will be.”
The two parents stared down at the tiny infant nestled in the crib. Giles thought he’d never seen anything so wonderful. In the confusion and terror of her birth, there hadn’t been time to linger over her delicate body and perfectly formed fingers and toes. If Ms. Icqueen had felt anything like this towards her own child, it was no wonder she’d continued to care for him throughout all the lengthy stretch of their mutual existences.
Buffy sighed, leaning her head back against Giles’ shoulder. “You still have to sing for me in the Espresso Pump, you know.”
“I think Theora’s just a little young for that type of outing.”
“You’re not gonna use that excuse. We’ll get Dawn to baby sit. Goodness knows she’s got enough practice.” She turned towards him and pulled his head down to hers. Tender warm lips slid against his and he sighed happily when a probing tongue slid between his lips.
The next moment he pulled back. “Buffy, are you sure? The doctor said…”
“The doctor didn’t know he was dealing with a Slayer.” Hazel eyes deepened to green peeked at him from under her eyelashes. “If you’re afraid of waking the baby, we could always have sex on the couch again.”
He rolled his eyes. “Spare me. Trust me, I can have quiet sex. I’m not so sure about you.”
The comment was punished with a smack. “I can be quiet. I can be super quiet.”
“Not according to Dawn.”
That got a Slayer glare. “Has she been talking about me again? I swear, when I get my hands on that--”
Whatever threat she was going to make against her little sister was cut off when Giles swiftly locked lips with her again.
Time to put that Slayer healing to the test.

Finis
- 10
- 11
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What a Mother Wouldn't Do