Adult-FanFiction.org : Buffy

Fond	By : pepperlandgirl Category: Angel the Series > Het - Male/Female Views: 2185 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Angel: The Series, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Notes: Set Post Carpe Noctem

�Who�s Buffy,� Fred asked Cordelia quietly.

�She�s�the love of his life.�

�And she was dead?�

Cordelia nodded. �For the second time.�

�But she got better, huh?�

Angel was listening intently on the phone, his face alternately shocked and elated. He looked up and caught their eyes, smiled slightly, and returned his attention to the ph
�Is he talking to her now?�

Cordelia shook her head. �No, he�s talking to Willow. She�s giving him all the details before�she wants him to be prepared.� Cordelia faced Fred. �Did you and him talk?�

Fred nodded and looked down. �Yeah. I think�I think I�m going up to my room. I�m pretty tired.�

�Hey, Fred�I know that this probably isn�t easy��

Fred backed away, putting space between her and Cordelia. �No, don�t feel sorry for me. It was just a stupid, little crush. I�m already over it. See?� She smiled so hard that she thought it would crack her face in two. But Cordy seemed to buy it. She smiled back and nodded, then walked over to Angel.

Fred took the stairs slowly, too exhausted and drained to move with any speed. If Buffy was alive, what did that mean? Did that mean she�d be coming to Los Angeles? Did that mean they�d be getting back together? What was the nature of their relationship, exactly? Fred thought this Buffy must have been pretty special�

�More special than me, anyway,� she muttered as she opened her bedroom door. She fell on the bed without undressing and stared up at the ceiling. She understood, of course. What Cordelia had told her made perfect sense. Angel was fond of her. Angel was her friend. Angel d ned never be more than because Angel was cursed. And even if he wasn�t, he had a True Love, just like in the fairy tales.

Fred sighed and rolled onto her side. She curled into a fetal position and stared out the window. The view wasn�t that spectacular. The bright lights of the city were impersonal and cold, and it never really felt like home to her anyway. She picked this room because of the view though�it looked out to the mountains, away from the city. And it was high. It maer fer feel like a princess in a tower�sometimes�in her more whimsical moods.

And she thought maybe Angel would be her prince. He had rescued her, after all�and he was what a prince should be.

While she was trapped in Pylea, what imagination she had died. She never fantasized about being rescued. She forgot that princes existed. She didn�t remember the stories, and she wouldn�t have called herself a damsel in distress. There wasn�t time for that. She needed to find a safe place to hide, she needed to find food, she needed to be smart and quick, and if there were parts of her that still longed to be just a girl, she silenced them.

But now, she didn�t need to hide. She didn�t need to hunt for food. She didn�t need to watch what she said and what she did. And it would be fine, natural, a relief, to indulge in a little fantasy, to have a few dreams, to long for companionship�to think about what it would feel like to be held in somebody�s arms, to be caressed and stroked, to be safe and loved and warm�

And inevitably, it was Angel her thoughts turned to.

But now, Buffy was back and Angel was fond of her, but it would never be more than that, and there shouldn�t be romance in the office, especially not when a curse was in effect. Sorry for the misunderstanding.

Fred thought the curse was a handy excuse. If it wasn�t the curse, it would be something else. She was just good ol� Fred. Good ol� Fred with her books and her theories and her equations. Good ol� Fred, always a super friend, but never much more than that.

Some nights she was so lonely she couldn�t stand it. Some nights, it was so dark despite the city lights, she longed to start a fire in the middle of her room for heat and light. Watch the familiar dancing flames and hug herself. Of course she never did that because burning down the hotel was not a good way to keep friends.

Her stomach growled. She tried to ignore it, she didn�t want to leave the sanctuary of her room, but all the food she bought was down in the kitchen. To get from her room to the kitchen, she�d have to walk right through the lobby. And maybe right past Angel. She glanced at the clock�but then, maybe not. He usually went out this time of night.

Cheered slightly by the prospect of ice cream covered in hot chocolate sauce, sprinkles, and nuts with a side of peanut butter, she made her way down to the kin. Sn. She ignored the stab of disappointment when she noted that the entire lower floor of the hotel was completely silent. Angel had left and�it occurred to her that Angel probably went to Sunnydale. Which meant that not only would she not see him again for days, when he came back, it�d probably be with Buffy in tow.

Fred didn�t think she wanted to be around for that. Talk about adding insult to injury.

She grabbed a large mixing bowl, bypassing the smaller cereal bowls entirely. That evening she had gone to the store, at Cordelia�s urging, and bought all her favorite comfort foods. If the ice cream didn�t help make her feel better, she�d go out to the Taco Bell around the corner for tacos. They were open late. Angel didn�t like her going out late by herself, but sometimes, a girl has to have her tacos.

�If you eat all that, you�ll make yourself sick.�

Fred spun around, clutching her bowl protectively. Her heart jumped to her throat. She just wanted to eat her ice cream in peace and lick her wounds. Because he was fond of her, and there were no hard feelings, right? �Angel. I�I thought you were out.�

He shrugged. �I�ll be going, soon.�

�To Buffy?�

�We have some things to talk about.�

Fred nodded. �I�m sure you do. A lot of important things to say�and do�will you be staying with her for awhile? I imagine she�ll want you there. Maybe for a long time. You�ll call if you plan on being away for awhile right? Because last time you were gone, well, you were gone for a long time, and not that you have to check in with me or anything, but you know, I might worry�well, we�d all worry�and I��

�I�ll be back by tomorrow,� he interrupted softly.

�Really?�

Angel nodded.

�Oh, Well�I�ll just be going upstairs now.�

�Fred�have you been crying?�

She put a hand to her face, startled. She felt the warm dampness beneath her cold fingers. She didn�t remember crying. She sniffed and rubbed her face self-consciously. �No,� she lied lamely.

�Fred, don�t lie to me. Is it because of what Cordelia�what I told you?�

�About us? Of course not. I already said I understood completely, and I do. The curse, right. But you�re fond of me, and that�s something, I suppose. My ice cream�s melting.�

Angel stepped towards her, and Fred instinctively wanted to step back, but shrcedrced herself not to move. She didn�t want to let him know that he had upset her. She just wanted to make her escape.

�Fred�I didn�t really want to have that conversation with you��
�I know. Cordelia said as much. But we already had it, so you�re off the hook. Say hi to Buffy for me�� She tried to walk past him, but he grabbed her arm and stopped her.

�I don�t like to see you upset Fred.� He gently brushed her cheek with the back of his hand, and his fingers lingered on her face. She blushed intensely at the contact. She felt so hot she knew her skin must be burning his fingers. She could feel the blush spread throughout her body, and despite the heat, she felt cold too. Chills everywhere.

She turned her face slightly. His thumb brushed against her lips so lightly that it tickled. Her mouth felt dry, and she hoped he wouldn�t stop touching her. But of course he would because he was only fond of her and he had to go meet the Love of His Life �, and this was just a friendly touch�nothing more.

Angel cupped her cheek with his other hand and she looked up, startled. He seemed very big, very tall, very broad. Impossibly big. She was so short. She felt as light and small as a fairy, like she could just float away, like he could smash her under his foot, and he could smash her so easily. Angel was always careful, always wary of his own strength, but did he know what he was doing now?

She opened her mouth slightly, words lurking just behind her lips. Another attempt to break away. Or something. He didn�t give her a chance to find out exactly what she wanted to say. He bent his head and kissed her lips so delicately, so gently, that she almost didn�t feel it.

Except she felt it everywhere.

His lips were cool but vibrant against hers. The tip of his tongue brushed hers slightly and pulled back shyly. His hands were still on her face, and she grabbed his shoulder with her free hand. She stepped in closer, and he felt so solid. And real. He was really kissing her. And it felt so good, so needed. Like when she finally figured a problem out after weeks and weeks of thinking and writing and it went click and she knew, and she thought it clicked now.

Angel pulled back and the world tilted wildly and then righted itself. Her legs shook, her hands were trembling. Angel gently took the bowl of melting ice cream out of her nerveless fingers and set it aside.

�I�� Fred started, but she didn�t know what to say. I what? I really needed that? I want more? I want so much more?

�I�m sorry,� Angel said. �I shouldn�t have done that.�

�No! No, I mean, no, don�t apologize. Please I�well�I guess I wanted you to.�

�I know�that�s why I shouldn�t have.�

�Oh.�

But he didn�t move at all, didn�t step back. He still crowded her personal space and made her feel so very vulnerable beneath the weight of his stare.

�I�m not a prince, Fred.�

Startled, she looked up. Had he been reading her mind? Had she been so obvious? She blushed again, but this time from acute embarrassment.

�I never said��

�I know you never said I was�but I get the feeling that�s what you think of me.�

�I don�t,� she whispered.

�I�m not, Fred. I don�t want you to get some idea of me in your head that�s not��

�I know who you are.�

Angel shook his head. �No, no you don�t.�

�So you�re not going to let me get close enough to find out?�

�Do you want to get that close?� He asked.

Fred�s heart thumped in his ears, her blood thrummed through her body. She understood that Angel was giving her a chance, an opening, and whatever future she had with him depended on her answer. She gravely nodded her head.

Angel kissed her again, and this time, she kissed him back as much as she dared. She opened her mouth slightly, and he took the invitation. He deepened the kiss and she clutched him desperately so she wouldn�t fall. Her ears were buzzing, buzzing, her body was buzzing, and she felt intoxicated. She clutched him to her until she ran out of breath and was forced to break the kiss.

Much to her disappointment, he took a step back. Away from her. She let her arms fall to her side.

�I do have to go.�

She nodded. �I know.�

�I will be back tomorrow.�

�Ok.�

�We�ll talk more than,� he promised. He sealed the promise with a kiss to the forehead, and she wanted to grab him again and make him stay.

�I�ll be here.�

Angel smiled at her. The warmth was back. Flooding her body down to her toes. He turned and disappeared, through the shadows and out the back door. She smiled slightly and grabbed her ice cream. She could still taste him on her lips, still feel his body�she drifted up the stairs to her room and suddenly, the city outside her window didn�t seem quite so cold, quite so impersonal.

Angel was fond of her. Maybe there�d be more than that.
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