Twenty-Five | By : Prophecy Category: -Buffy the Vampire Slayer > FemmeSlash - Female/Female > Buffy/Faith Views: 2595 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer (BtVS), nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story. |
The woods. My heart is pounding. Oh god oh god. They're going to catch me. It hurts to even think that, because I'm 25, and I always thought I might be the one Slayer in history to live past it. And now I've made it, it's my 25th birthday, and they're going to kill me. It's all going to be over.. I can't fight them off this time, I know it..
Dawn came back from college to celebrate with me-just us. We watched Titanic and ate chocolate frosting out of the can, the way we used to when we were younger-before we found out she wasn't real. This was such a big birthday.. and it was just us. Xander and Anya moved away. Willow and Tara moved to LA. Giles.. god. I can't even think about Giles.. the way he was laying when I found him.. alcohol poisoning. Too much scotch, too often. They found the last bottle he ever drank from half spilled on the carpet, alongside three other bottles.
That was a month ago. If I didn't know better I'd say he knew. Actually, I don't know better. Maybe he did know. He was my Watcher, after all.
Anyway, it was just me and Dawn. And I shouldn't have left, but I had to patrol.. The rumors.. But now I see the reason for the rumors.. There was no vampire cult. They had started the rumors, these monsters..
My leg is cramping up, but I can't move.. I have to stay in this bush.. They'll find me. God, it's pretty much sooner or later, not now or never, and I hate the thought that no matter how much I fight they're going to win this time, because I'm twenty-five and they've done this before.
I think about the smell of grass. Fresh cut, damp with morning dew. Rolling on it as a child, my mother's daughter, playing at grandma's house with my cousins. So innocent. The leaves in fall.. Uncle Paul raking them into big piles and smiling as we jumped in them. Raking them up again and cursing because we jumped again. But he wasn't really angry, and he'd start up the grill..
Hamburgers. Big juicy ones, grease running down our chins and staining our shirts. Ketchup falling in blobs everywhere, Cecilia and I squeezing it from the bottle onto each individual French fry. My Mom, nursing Dawn and laughing at something my dad said. Grandpa always smelled like old, old books.. The way Giles did..
It's funny what you remember, in your last moments. Because these are my last moments. They're so close that I can practically feel them. And I remember Faith-a child, that's all, just a little girl, used, abused, and oversexed. I remember her telling me what they did to her-ten years old, held down at the wrists.. I wanted to kill them all, I wanted to save her from her life, and now I'll never get a second chance.
I hope Dawn warns her.. but how would she know? I hope Faith doesn't have the same delusions as me, I hope she doesn't believe that she'll live past twenty-five because she's in prison. I don't want to think of her heart being broken again-I shouldn't have done that to her, and god if I could go back..
Things are starting to get fuzzy. I'm tired, and they're not, and there are so many of them, and they're all after me.. I want to think about Faith more, the way she felt to me-so soft and warm, and how we made love night after night. And how scared I was when we killed Allan, and how I blamed her, and broke her heart after I'd vowed not to..
All my fault. All my fault. I'm so sorry, Faith. I want to say it out loud, I want to say it to you, but you're not here and I'll never see you again. Please take care of Dawn, I want to tell her, and run away. Stop time if you can, don't ever be twenty-five. Don't be like me, crouched in the night holding your breath, heart pounding, listening for echoing footsteps like a man on death row.
Oh please oh please oh please..
I need to see Angel find redemption, I need to make things up with Faith, I need to see Dawn get married, I need to hold Xander and Anya's daughter, I need to visit Giles' grave again.. Oh god, oh please.. Silent tears stream down my face and I wish I'd ended it myself long ago.. Died on my terms.. Done everything I had to do..
I don't want to die like this, I don't want to be alone in the woods in the night where no one will hear me scream and they'll never find my body.. I don't want Dawn to live the rest of her life wondering what happened to me.. I want to scream for them to let me do it myself, that I'll gladly die a thousand times over, but please, please don't kill me like this, crying and lost in the woods like a baby animal.
I'll never see Dawn graduate.
"Over here! I hear her.."
It's coming. I want to think of Dawn, of Faith, of Giles, Angel, my mom.. But all I can think is how horrible it is to die this way.
That's when someone grabs my collar and stands me up. "Found 'er!"
"Nooo.." I sound inhuman.. but it doesn't matter, because I was never human and that's why I can't die like one. That's why I'm going to die this way.
The one holding me flings me to the ground in the middle of a circle. There must be ten of them.. more maybe.. I wish Faith were here, I wish we could die together, then someone else would know, someone besides Giles, and I wouldn't be alone and scared.
"Pity you made us chase you so long. It could 'ave all been over so quick.." A smirk. I want to tear his face off and slice into him the way I'd sliced into Faith-if only I could relive those moments, I would have kissed her like she'd asked.
"Read it."
"Do I 'ave to?"
"Protocol."
"Right then. You, Buffy Anne Summers, having lived to twenty and five, and thusly becoming too old to properly perform your duties as The Slayer, are hereby sentenced to die on this night, January 18 of the year Two Thousand and Six, by order of the Watchers' Council of England. Have you any last requests?"
I let out a sob. "Please, let me do it myself."
"They always want that," one of them mumbled.
"Request noted and denied. The Council would like to extend its hand in gratitude for your ten years of service. May your soul rest in peace."
I heard a shot from somewhere nearby, and a momentary sharp pain in my head..
And then everything stopped.
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