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Reviews for Breaking Faith

By : ToughLove

From MTL on April 30, 2008
You were right, I loved this chapter. I especially loved Rona trying to out do Vi when it came to fucking Faith and the DP. Also loved Faith becoming Rona's little white bitch, that was hot. The cop scenario also worked very well in my opinion.

For me, Willow's powerful, but not all-powerful and certainly not powerful enough to take down Buffy. The younger slayers yes, Faith maybe (your story offers a convincing scenario that she could) but, in my opinion, not Buffy.

I had a feeling from your Buffy/Dawn chapter that you prefer Dawn, but hotter than Buffy? Maybe as hot. But then again I can't force you to like Buffy and we're all entitled to our own opinions. There are after all plenty of great stories featuring Buffy if I want to read about Buffy. Although I am happy to hear Dawn will be reappearing, I have to agree she's hot, although there are a lot of hot women on this show and I'm not sure I could pick a favourite.

I was wondering if this story was going to have an end or if it was just going to continue until you ran out of ideas. Although obviously it's sad to think that this great story is coming to an end I'm rather intrigued how you plan on ending this and greatly look forward to reading the end when it finally comes.

I hope the story goes out with a bang.
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From Merlinius on April 19, 2008
I liked the secretary theme, but not the dad giving intructions. I also thought Wes was dead. If Wes was going to be used, I would've liked a 1 on 1, cus of their history.
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From MTL on April 18, 2008
Nice little update. Good to see Wesley included, he was a fun character, and as stated in the chapter Faith owed that family. As a matter of fact perhaps Faith got off a bit lightly considering she tortured Wesley, but then again if I were Wesley I'd definitely prefer this type of revenge lol.

I didn't mean to be too overly critical of your story, I was just speaking my mind. I hope I didn't offend you, and I hope I won't offend you by speaking my mind again.

I understand in this reality Willow was never 'saved' by Xander and all, and in some ways I like Willow as a Dom (I liked her clothing and attitude in season 3 and 6), it's just that unfortunately for me personally every time I read a story where Willow is a Dom I can't help think of the end of season 6 and it kind of spoils it a little for me. But don't get me wrong I understand just because that's how I feel doesn't mean that's how everyone feels and I'm not trying to say that there is no way Willow could be a Dom, I'm just saying I find it a little hard to believe she could enslaves someone like Faith when she herself has many self-esteem issues. I could possibly see her dominating Tara, and Kennedy who in my opinion deserves a spanking much more than Faith, and other characters, but a slayer?

As for Faith, I can see her being a Dom because of her outward attitude or a Sub because as you say she has self-esteem issues, and the concept of her being broken and turned into somebody's bitch is great which is why I kept coming back to the story but as stated for me personally I just had issues with Willow being the one to break Faith, however as I believe I've already said these issues are more to do with me than they are to do with your great story.

As for Kennedy I would have rather Willow break her and have two Toys instead of sharing her pet but again that's just my opinion and I'm sure there are probably many people out there that would like to see Kennedy as a Dom. And although I didn't like her character I will admit she was hot.

My criticism of the immortal stands.

I can understand your reluctance to use the Illyria character, and have to agree there is no way Willow could control Illyria, although in my opinion Willow could watch Illyria as she plays with Faith just to make sure her bitch doesn't come to any real harm, but it's your story I'm just making suggestions.

I hope you consider including other Angel characters like the girl with the lightning powers (I can't remember her name), the werewolf girl (again can't remember her name, and can't remember if you've used her yet or not, I remember there being a character or two I didn't recognise a while back) and Kate the cop (I may have just accidentally guessed who will show up in the next chapter, but then again I could be wrong).

And hey, I'd love to read a Buffy/Angel reunion chapter or maybe even a Buffy/Angel/Spike reunion chapter where the reuniting characters use Faith as their slave. I mean surely Buffy and Angel owe Faith pain for trying to break them up in season 3, and I'm pretty sure Spike wouldn't have a problem with punishing Faith, either for winding him up in season 4 or for that little disagreement they had in season 7 or for just being mean to Buffy. Speaking of Buffy it surprises me she isn't featured much in this story given the fact that Buffy has a lot more issues with Faith then Willow does.

Anyway, keep up the good work and if I ever review this again I'll try not to mention once again my small critical problems with your awesome story.
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From ANON - anonymous on April 18, 2008
What about Connor? Or Illyria? She seems Dom even on a good day.
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From Merlinius on April 05, 2008
I loved the last 2 chapters. Any Slayer on Slayer stuff is near gold. I say near because the pee play is not my thing.
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From MTL on April 04, 2008
This is one of my favourite stories, not just on this website, but in the entire world.

It is very well written and contains my favourite thing in the world to write/read about, women dominating other women.

The original breaking and training of Faith is very well done, and I love chapters 4 and 10.

However I find some of the characters you have chosen to feature in the story a little weird.

For example in the case of the latest update you included the character of the Immortal, a character who was only used in one episode of Angel and then quickly written out in the official season eight comics. I could be wrong but I think that was because nobody liked the idea of the Immortal, I know I certainly didn't. So it seems odd to me to include the Immortal as Buffy's boyfriend when it is made clear that a decoy Buffy was dating the Immortal and not the real Buffy. That being said it's your story and I'm aware you are free to do as you wish. All I'm saying is it's a little weird to include the Immortal and not someone like Illyria who was a much more interesting character in my opinion and had a dominating attitude which would probably work very well in the context of your story. In fact there are a lot of Angel characters which could be very easily recruited by the Council or even just allies of Buffy who Faith could be pimped out too.

My only other problem with the story is that personally I just can't imagine Willow as a Dom. Don't get me wrong, I like Willow, she was a great character, and I loved it when she turned evil and originally I started to really by into her as a badass (and a Dom) but then that was ruined for me at the end of season six of Buffy. I mean one minute Willow was acting really cool and badassy and then all of a sudden she breaks down and cries because Xandre loves her no matter what, which was the worst ending of a season they've done in my opinion, not including that weird drugged up dream episode at the end of season four.

Then again my problem with Willow as a Dom comes from the TV series, and not this great story you've written.

In fact if anything could ever convince me that Willow could be a Dom it's this story.

As for Kennedy I just find her to be a bit of a brat and I really can't see her dominating anyone.

I've always been a big Faith fan, and although I think she's far more suited to the role of mistress than Willow or Kennedy reading about her acting so submissive and out of character is extremely erotic.

As I said this is a great story and my petty and over explained problems with it aside, I hope you keep it up with the same quality of the previous chapters.

I would love to see Faith doing role-play as a waitress or maid (complete with French maids outfit) or some other subservient role, possibly serving a party of guests.

I'd also like to see Faith get gang banged by a group of girls wearing strap on's, either a collection of the other female cast members or perhaps a group of the slayers.

Or even just an intimate night alone for Faith and her owners.
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From Merlinius on March 11, 2008
Loved the cheer theme. Please the Star Wars theme I suggested next!
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From Merlinius on February 23, 2008
I love the milk play in this chapter. Kudos!
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From Oric13 on February 13, 2008
Chapter 18 - Toy Shopping (1/2): I always enjoy the chapters in which Toy is publicly degraded and this was no exception. I especially love that the masochistic little slut is now actually enjoying the incredibly humiliating things her Mistresses have her do -- this somehow makes it even more degrading.
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From Oric13 on February 04, 2008
Chapter 17 - All At Sea: Not sure what to say... I didn't dislike this chapter, but it's certainly not amongst my favourites. The lesbian sex was good (it usually is), but the pirate role-playing didn't really make much sense and I'm not sure why you included it. Is it simply your plan to include some random role-playing scenario with whatever random Buffy/Angelverse character you've selected to fuck Faith? Because it's starting to feel like you're drifting away from whatever storyline this series used to have. And personally, I do like some plot with my fanfic porn.

My advice: come up with a good ending and gradually work towards it with every new chapter. If you don't I fear this story will soon turn into another boring plotless out-of-character fuckfest, thereby ruining the great potential this story had when you started it.
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From Merlinius on January 15, 2008
You lost me after Willow said Faith was gonna screw an old guy. The kitchen play was great, but this was the first chapter I had no desire to finish. Thanks for thinking about my suggestions. :-)
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From Oric13 on January 13, 2008
Chapter 16 - Waiting for Service: I have to admit that I cringed slightly when I read that this chapter would feature Wesley's dad, but somehow you've managed to make it work. I liked this chapter better than the one before (even though I'm normally more into lezzie dom than plain ole hetero).

Good characterization. And I'm very happy that you explained Willow's reasoning for lending out Toy (aside from getting off on seeing Faith volunteeringly debase herself): Willow glared down at her, ?he?s another person you wronged before you learnt your place. You have a lot to make up for.?.

I kinda expected this one to be more kinky, though. I was especially surprised that there wasn't any spanking with Wesley's dad being an English authority figure (perhaps you considered it TOO obvious?).

Still, overall a good chapter. And I really liked the intro with Toy tied spread-eagled on the kitchen table getting fisted.
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From Merlinius on January 03, 2008
More naked workouts please:) But like Oric13 said, Amy made no sense with no real backstory. I'd love to see more andrew with some kind of Star Wars kink, and a more detailed Cordy scene.
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From ANON - steve on January 03, 2008
fantastic
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From Oric13 on January 03, 2008
Chapter 14 - Toy Examination: I really enjoyed the new version of this chapter -- big improvement!

Chapter 15 - Lessons In Lust: I liked the beginning with Toy working out naked in the gym. The whole roleplaying thing with Amy Madison was a bit confusing, mostly because in season 8 of BtVS (comic) Amy is an enemy of Willow, so it felt weird to see her playing with Willow's Toy. Also, you didn't explain why Amy got to play with Toy and what her current "connection" to Willow is. Is she really a principal now and is Faith playing the naughty schoolgirl for her, or are they both playing the part?

I think you should put in some kind of explanation/exposition before getting to the roleplaying parts. Like what is Willow/Kennedy's motive for lending out their Toy. You explained this very well with Andrew and I really hope you'll continue to do so, instead of randomly picking out Buffyverse characters and letting them fuck Faith.

Other then that the sex was still hot, so good job there :)
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